(listen to First Love/Late Spring for the full experience)
God, what time is it? The sky was too dark to tell; the miscellaneous lights of the city blurred together like a symphony of visual disorientation. Not like it matters anyway... where am I?
The hospital was like a never-ending dream. Half awake, half asleep; medicated daydreams, vivid nightmares; unable to sleep, unable to wake—it was impossible to think at all. Thoughts, violent as a hurricane, crashed into each other until only one had remained.
I want to go home.
The feeling was so overwhelming, it was numbing. It silenced the night. Though each step was unsure of its existence, it did not stop. Not until it reached its destination. Not until it was home.
Home.
Wrapped in the familiar scents of well-worn, weathered leather and long-ago-discontinued cologne, it smelled like memories. Lingering heavy in the air, the mechanical notes of old motor oil, metallic corrosion, and ozone breathed in a comforting nostalgia. It smelled like him, like home.
Home.
Clutched in hands, close to chest—remnant of a child dearly holding onto his favorite toy to safely fall asleep—was a legacy, the suit of Mecha Man. Cradled in between the hollowed space of the collapsed mecha’s limbs, a comparatively smaller figure lay; a softly aged leather jacket covering him, as if a blanket, tucking him into bed for the last time.
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it’s been quite a while since things has changed in the torrance branch of sdn. after the attack, robert took a break to somewhat recover before going back to work. he’s still too injured to use the mecha suit to fight, so he’s been practicing with the new dispatching network built into it. he also has a portable version in the wrist computer of his hero suit. he’s put all of his attention on his work as a distraction to keep himself busy. it’s been relatively the same. it’s same job with the same people but... different enough for him to feel what’s been missing.
mandy had asked robert if having everyone back on the team was too much, as he’s still recovering, but he told her he liked the challenge. it was half true. it was certainly a learning experience, having everyone on the team again. everyone has a different working schedule, too.
phenomaman was assigned back into his old team but regularly joins shifts and hangs out often with the rest of the crew after work. sonar rejoined the pheonix program and is part of the team again, which was nice. malevola tried to play it cool with how much she’s missed him, but it’s been obvious. sonar even more so. royd also helped him fixed up his upgrades after… it stopped working. he definitely kept them just because he thought it looked really cool.
it’s funny, visi’s and chase’s positions has been swapped. er well, courtney and shooting star now. when chase told me that he had picked out a new name for himself, i immediately made fun of him for how corny it is but.. admittedly it’s a nice name. i think it really suits him. mandy says she likes it too.
courtney is now working in the cubical next to me, officially as an apprentice dispatcher under me. she was still recovering, and is currently in physical therapy, so i recommended her to try it. mandy was very supportive of the idea, she probably thought courtney helping me with the z-team would take a load off my plate. in some ways it did, but showing her the ropes has been another set of difficulties in and of itself. courtney seems like she’s been enjoying herself, or at least she’s enjoying talking to everyone. i think she likes actually being a part of the team again, i know i do. things have been easier.
…
but i still miss her.
she quit, a while ago. mandy had told me. even after she let me know, i couldn’t bring myself to try to contact her. royd told me she’s been doing well, that she moved to a nicer place. she still talks to chase sometimes, i think. and the rest of the z-team... they don’t say much about her to me. i probably snapped at them at some point. chase might’ve told them not to say anything to me. or something like that. i can’t remember, the week after i killed shroud.. it was all a blur.
fuck.
i really lost myself that week. talking to her then would’ve made everything worse. i needed time. i needed to fix myself first. still, i could’ve said something when she quit. but then again she must’ve had her own reasons for quitting, she didn’t need me bothering her about it. i still need to sort myself out first anyways. i need to get better. to regain my strength again. i need to be stronger. to earn being called a hero again. to be called mechaman. only then—
SNAP SNAP
robert jolted his chair, his eyes shot open.
“i’ve been calling your name for the past five-fucking-minutes, don’t tell me your damn hearin’ is worse than mine’s?” a familiar voice shouted at him.
“you need a hearing aid or somethin’ already?”
“chase-!” robert sputtered, cracking a smile as his eyes saw chase’s smug expression. he shook his head slowly, breathily laughing, “i’m not that old.” he says while shifting his weight in the seat, crossing his arms.
“unlike a certain someone.” robert added, returning a smugness of his own.
“you sure as hell act like it. what’s up with earlier?”
“oh i was just thinking about..” his words trailing off as he glances to the side.
“just um, a bit lost in thought…” his smile dropping as he looks into the distance.
