#disability tw

I don’t exactly know how to do this, but here goes.

You haven’t seen me around lately because I’ve been dealing with some pretty serious health issues. Turns out I’ve got this very rare genetic disorder that’s only going to get progressively worse from here on out. It’s called Spinocerebeller Ataxia, if you want to look it up. It attacks my cerebellum causing balance and coordination issues. And, as of right now, there is no cure and no treatment. It’s a terminal diagnosis.

I struggled for a long time trying to decide if I should tell you guys about this or not. Or if I should just slowly fade out of your collective recollections like a happy memory, but then I thought about how nobody in my real life really knows about this wonderful community, and how they wouldn’t know to tell you all once I was gone. And I couldn’t just drop off the face of the planet like that without some kind of explanation. And… well, I just really miss you guys, too

I have no idea how long I’m going to have. This disease is so rare and it affects everyone so differently, but I think doing some gifs and getting back into reblogging whump might help. So I’m going to try and finish up all the requests I have over at my gifs blog and get this blog active again.

I hope it was the right decision to tell you guys. In fact, I may share some of my journey on here if you’d rather unfollow me so you don’t have to read about it. This is heavy and I don’t expect anyone to stick around for it. But I also could have another 5-10 years, depending on how my disease progresses, and I’m going to make the most of it. It’s just going to be very hard fought. I’m disabled now and I need all the love and support I can get as I traverse this new normal. I can still work and I’m still mobile for now, but that’s changing fast. I start physical and speech therapy soon, and hopefully that will help with some of my symptoms.

I love you all so much and I’m happy to answer any of your questions over DM but, please forgive me if I don’t respond to many asks publicly.

Love you always,

If any of you feel appalled by that, you are welcome to unfollow and block me.

Lately I feel extremely intimidated by all these anti AI posts, that completely exclude the usage of AI due to disability. People with dyslexia or even autistic people use AI to help them with syntax etc. I feel like this needs to be acknowledged or else this is just plain ableism and discrimination.

//Slipped while running errands in the rain, fucked up the same foot I sprained a couple weeks ago and was already healed. Maybe it wasn't healed all the way, because WOW IT FUCKING HURT.

My workstation (which I use to write/draw as well because home is work) isn't particularly sprained-ankle friendly, so if I vanish again, my apologies. I'm trying my best.

But the fandom revelling in it makes it horrible. People's excitement that Moash "deserves" to be blind because he's bad (and maybe if he's good he'll be cured! uwu) gets to be witnessed by actual blind fans and fans with other disabilities. It's not a good look.

I'm not blind but I am disabled and people in my real life have told me to my face that I would get better if I would just be a better person.

I was not made disabled as a punishment so that I could learn a lesson.

I can’t speak to much here, but I do know I’ve seen some BBU works where well-meaning family or friends had a Box Boy given to someone with a disability or chronic illness/pain issue to be a caregiver for them and protector along those lines. @redwingedwhump has a story like that, for instance! 

starting small-

CMT is a nerve disease. That’s basically it. It’s a mostly invisible illness that is passed down from generation to generation. there is no cure. 1/2500 people have this disease. most people who have this disease experience pain and numbness in the legs, therefore, we are limited in our athletic abilities.