As I read more of the EU Iâm just struck by how much Luke needs a break. Where he can (pls go get therapy) rest and be treated as a human being and not a one man Jedi army and be loved for being Luke and not a free intergalactic conflict resolver. Itâs so sad that as the EU progresses Luke is just beat down and hurt over and over again. also my gosh I canât even imagine how he would cope with all that war and the toll it would have on his mental health) (also hope you are doing great!)
lol, in space no one can hear you scream have depression
(I mean, this is true of ALL the heroes tbh but I know youâre focusing on Luke)
Well, this is why so many of us Legends hoes loved that Mara hooked up with him, because she saw and loved the regular guy underneath the Big Damn Heroâą, and she also didnât let him sit around feeling sorry for himself or blaming himself pointlessly for things that werenât his fault, etc.
The Doylist perspective on that masochistic beat-down is that Legends went on too long with increasingly convoluted, grim, nonsensical storylines that just resulted in pummeling the Squadâą like a dead horse because YA CANâT KEEP SELLING BOOKS AND COMICS AND SHIT IF THEM STARS AINâT HAVINâ ANY WARS YA FEEL
So that resulted in Luke and his family losing close to everything and having an excess load of trauma akin to a 70-car pile-up on a blizzard-struck freeway. With that said, however - on the one hand, Luke Skywalker is meant to be an inspirational figure which means he may achieve or reflect things in a less realistic but aspirational way to spur us on (which is...exactly what he did to himself in Mindor, lol, WHAT WOULD LUKE SKYWALKER DO?). On the other...some people really can be that resilient. There are real people in this world who have gone through absolute hell and still clung to their principles and havenât lost their faith and hope and compassion.
It all goes back to Luke having that salt-of-the-earth foundation to his childhood along with his numerous life experiences. Heâs seen the highest highs and lowest lows in terms of what people can be driven to, and heâs brimming with empathy from that. Heâs not made of stone or durasteel, he has his own moments of weakness and grief, but his convictions are steadfast and he knows better than to give up or fight fire with fire, because that only makes things worse and devalues the sacrifices others have made. Thereâs also a lot to be said for a person with strong faith in a higher power - being so deeply connected to the Force, to all living things, the very fabric of the universe, and knowing thereâs something beyond the very difficult life heâs had to slog through (and likely a reunion with lost loved ones) is a continuous source of hope he can never lose.
Would I prefer that he - and everyone else - wouldnât have gone through all that shit? HELL YEAH. Because I didnât find it interesting. If my faves are gonna suffer, at least make it GOOD.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
Hi, hope youâre doing okay! Sending lots of love and positivity! For the prompts, Luke gets Injured during a Jedi mission or something and anakin goes into overprotective dad mode?
(Thanks!)
âDad, itâs just a sprain.âÂ
âThe Doctor said to stay off of it,â Anakin says, as he settles a pillow under his sonâs ankle. âSo youâre staying off of it. Got it?âÂ
As a counterpart to your Leia post, Lukeâs response to his trauma? Hope youâre doing great!
BLESS YOU
link to the post about Leiaâs trauma response here (please heed the tws at the beginning of that post, tho)
Iâll be honest, I havenât thought about Luke as much as Iâve thought about Leia. But here are my thoughts.
Depression
Luke hides it pretty well, but heâs a depressed bean. Itâs more lurking and crawling than bone-crushing, though - is insidious and gnawing. He still smiles, still laughs, still jokes, and actually feels happiness - but beneath it is always, always, always a kernel of sadness. His natural state is not smiling, though to most people it might seem that way.
Determination
Luke throws himself into making sure No One Ever Has To Suffer Like I Did, to an almost obsessive degree. This includes âlosing peopleâ (e.g. his aunt and uncle) as well as âmurdering thousands of people all at onceâ (i.e. destroying the Death Star). This is partly what fuels his (less commonly known) reputation for coldness and objectivity - because heâd rather be the one to deliver the killing blow than make someone else do it. This also feeds into a (again, a lesser known) trait of being willing to kill and make the Hard Choices - because ultimately, Luke will do what is right for the greater good, or for the greater number of people, or to protect a child or someone more innocent than him. Even if that means making a hard or objectively terrible choice that will put blood or pain on his own conscience.
Isolation
Luke has a tendency to isolate, with the exception of Leia and, to a lesser degree, Han - though when heâs particularly depressed (e.g. after Bespin) heâll even isolate from them.Â
Emotional numbness
Luke doesnât actually...feel...negative emotions very well. Or any emotion, actually. Heâs good at presenting a particular persona (i.e. one of joy, of light, of happiness), but underneath it all heâs...really pretty numb. It takes a lot for him to Feel Things. This does lead him to doing Stupid Things sometimes, just so heâll actually feel things. Which leads me to...
Stupid shit
Luke will do incredibly stupid and daring things just to incite an adrenaline rush, or to feel the fear of death, or to feel guilt or excitement or...anything, really. This includes anything from taking on an incredibly risky mission to deciding heâs gonna see if he can survive a jump off a 100 ft. cliff by using the Force.
Empathy
Luke was already an incredibly empathetic person, but Luke responded to his trauma by growing...more empathetic. This is a short bullet point, because I donât really know what else to say here, but...yes. Luke is incredibly empathetic, and part of that is because of his trauma.
Bringing happiness
Luke, because heâs a depressed bean and is surrounded by depressed beans, made it his goal to cheer people up. He was already a natural ray of sunshine before shit hit the fan, but afterwards he made the choice to not let himself harden and be angry and bitter and righteously wrathful with the world. Instead, he wanted to bring happiness and joy to those around him - especially since they all lived such a (relatively) bleak and miserable existence at the time. This seems at odds with his (again, lesser known) qualities as a âsometimes merciless and objective soldier/warrior/Jediâ but...theyâre actually compatible, because Luke will do whatever he deems necessary to bring the most good into the world, even if that includes killing one or two (or a few thousand) people.
Flashbacks
Most of Lukeâs flashbacks are emotional flashbacks - i.e. he experiences the emotions he felt at the time of his trauma, rather than reliving the events themselves. He actually has a lot of these, though he doesnât actually realize them for what they are for a long time.
Avoidance
Luke hates it when people talk about him destroying the Death Star, or if they know about his Aunt and Uncle and bring it up, and to a lesser degree Obi-Wan (though he likes talking about Obi-Wan usually - just not about his death). He will aggressively change the topic if any of those things are brought up, and trains his brain to instinctively think of something else whenever he thinks about one of those things.
Nightmares
Luke doesnât actually dream about the events of his trauma hardly at all, if ever. But he does have nightmares that follow certain themes: losing people he loves, being forced to watch people he loves be hurt or killed, being forced to make impossible decisions that hurt people, etc.
Survivorâs guilt
Yep, Luke has this in spades. Especially as the years in the Rebellion go by, and the number of friends heâs buried mounts - though it absolutely started with his aunt and uncle, and was compounded by everyone but Wedge dying in the Death Star run.
tl;dr Luke has PTSD too guys! Heâs just one of the ones who made an active, conscious choice to take all of his pain and use it to make a better world! A world where others donât have to face the same kinds of things he did, and a world where he can bring light and joy and happiness!! Which is just as valid as the people who break and get angry and bitter and closed off to protect themselves! That also doesnât mean heâs not traumatized, though!!!
Hi! I just read your last fic and it was amazing!! Could you please write more with bipolar mercutio!! (Merc being bipolar has been one of my fave headcannons for the longest time and you write it so well!) thanks! Have a nice day!
âMercutio? You there?â He should be. They had decided to meet there, and Romeo had already checked that he wasnât at any other obvious location. Valentine had made sure he wasnât at their home, Benvolio hadnât seen him, and Juliet had told him that he wasnât skulking about annoying Tybalt. But no one came to the door when he knocked, and when Romeo had tried the handle he found the door locked. The call heâd made went straight to voice-mail.
âMercutio, if youâre in there, Iâm coming it,â Romeo announced loudly as his quickly diminishing patience reached its end. He could only be thankful that Mercutio had given him a copy of his key a long time before because otherwise he would have been forced to break into the apartment some way. He couldnât just walk away; he had to find Mercutio, find out what was wrong. Because he was convinced now that something was wrong, and with what he knew of Mercutioâs varying moods the feeling left him cold.
Inside the apartment was, as usual, shoes to the side and Mercutioâs favorite jacket carelessly thrown on top of them. He often threw it to the side if he had things on his mind when he got home, which Romeo knew by experience was most of the days. Closing the door behind him Romeo removed his own shoes quicklyâMercutio had nagged at him enough times that it was pure instinct by nowâand walked into the apartment proper.
âMercutio?â he called, waiting a moment for an answer. When none came he went to the bedroom, checking into the kitchen and bathroom quickly as he passed, just in case. He was already certain that he wouldnât find Mercutio in either of them, but Benvolio had drilled it into him that it never hurt to look take a look.
The bedroom door was open, but inside it was dark, too dark for Romeo to see clearly. Mercutio had made sure to get curtains that would keep any and all sun out for when he wanted to sleep. Romeo had been there often enough, however, that he didnât hesitate in reaching out and pressing the light switch, immediately bringing the whole room into focus.
âOh,â Romeo breathed out, his heart aching as he slowly walked over to the bed. âMercutio.â
Mercutio didnât react at first when Romeo touched him, just stared at some undefinable point by his hand with an empty look, but when Romeo sat down he closed his eyes and breathed out heavily. He didnât move from the curled up position he lied in, but he did move one of his arms to allow more room for Romeo.
âHow long have you been like this?â Romeo asked gently, rubbing the back of Mercutioâs hand.
âI donât know,â Mercutio murmured back, his voice hoarse. âWhat day is it?â
âThursday.â
âThen two days. I think.â Mercutio breathed out slowly, his voice coming a little stronger as he spoke again. âIt hasnât been like this the whole time. I only lied down sometime last night.â
âItâs in the afternoon now.â Romeo leaned forward and stroked some of Mercutioâs hair behind his ear. âWhen did you last eat?â A shrug. âOkay. Do you think you can move? Can you sit up if I help you?â
It turned out that Mercutio did need help to sit up, most of his body having fallen asleep after lying in one position for so long, but once he was up on his feet he could stand and walk on his own, albeit Romeo still kept one hand around his waist as they slowly made their way into the bathroom.
âTake off your clothes, and Iâll turn on the bath,â Romeo said as he let go. He knew Mercutio wasnât capable of making jokes right then, but a part of him still ached when no amused retort came his way from Mercutio about trying to get him naked.Â
The relieved sigh that escaped Mercutioâs lips as he sank down into the water, however, alleviated whatever ache Romeo was feeling. For just a moment he stayed crouched next to the bathtub, watching Mercutio simply enjoy the warmth. It seemed like he could feel the warmth seep into his own body simply by watching.
âHey, Mercutio?â
âMm?â Mercutio turned half-open eyes to Romeo, though he closed them again when Romeo pressed their lips together. The kiss was soft, gentle, full of affection, and he leaned into Romeoâs hand when it cupped his cheek.
âI love you, you know,â Romeo said when he pulled back, only to rest their foreheads together. He didnât expect a reply, didnât need one, but Mercutioâs small smileâhowever short-livedâwarmed his heart. For a long moment they stayed there, their breaths mingling, Mercutioâs skin warm and alive beneath Romeoâs hand, then Romeo moved away and stood up. âIâll go make something to eat. Donât worry about getting up, Iâll bring it here for you. You okay with that?â
Mercutio nodded slightly, leaning back his head against the wall. âYeah. Iâm fine.â
âThatâs good to hear.â Before he walked away Romeo bent down quickly, pressing his lips against Mercutioâs temple. âIâll be out in the kitchen if you need anything.â
Mercutio only hummed in answer, so Romeo felt good about leaving him there. Momentarily, anyway. It didnât seem like Mercutio had reached the worst point, simply one of plain exhaustion, but Romeo also knew that could change at any moment. He needed to hurry up and make something for Mercutio to eat and drink, and then they would take care of whatever came next. Whatever happened Romeo would make sure to be there.
@demigod756â âMercutio and Escalus with some kind of hurt/comfort and angstâ.
You will also find it here on my AO3 page with more notes.
Can be read as a standalone piece or as the prequel to my other prompt fill âShelterâ (hey @team-mom-wannabeâ you wanted a backstory? Here it is!)
Swearing through gritted teeth and pressing his hand to the wound â not that it was helping any, since it was deep and the bleeding was obviously internal â Bartolomeo couldn't help but feel glad that Valentine had been too busy with his studies to make it to the restaurant for a âScaligatheringâ, as Mercutio had dubbed their small family outing.Â
At least the youngest of his boys was safe and away from trouble.
The eldest, however, was at his side, all huge eyes and shaking hands, staring down at him in fear. The youth had dashed to his help as soon as he saw trouble â but the attacker was faster. One moment, uncle and nephew were walking along the well-lit street, engrossed in conversation â now that Mercutio had moved out, they had much to discuss whenever they met â and the next moment, Escalus was sprawled on the wet pavement, clutching at his side where an angry, agonizing pain was pooling like melted iron. The assailant had instantly fled into the maze of narrow alleys, mercifully having caused no harm to Mercutio â apparently, Escalus had been his only target.
"I would think... my position as judge... called for hiring a sniper, not a brute with a shank," Bartolomeo tried to smile at the panicked boy who was kneeling beside him, but gave up the attempt as soon as he felt a coppery, metallic tang in his mouth.
The situation was not looking good at all.
But if there was one thing Escalus was not planning to do⊠then it was dying and leaving his nephew alone, shocked and frightened. He owed it to his sister, if not to the boy himself. If he had to die, if that wound was going to be the cause of his death â so be it, but the least he could â and had to â do was stay alive and conscious until they got to the hospital and make sure Mercutio was alright. He knew his nephew better than anyone else did, Valentine and Tybalt, Mercutioâs partner, left aside; and was well aware that behind his brave and bright trickster façade, the boy was vulnerable â much like himself. Very few things could strip off the protective layers and strike home⊠but watching someone close to you unexpectedly die in the street was definitely part of the list. And Escalus did not want to think what it would do to his nephew.
Blacking out right there in the empty street was not an option.
âM-maybe they canât afford a sniper,â Mercutio chuckled nervously, pulling his uncleâs hand away from his side and rucking up his shirt to take a look. The wound looked deceptively small and innocuous, but neither the uncle nor the nephew were misled by its seeming harmlessness and the lack of visible bleeding.
Escalus tried to pull himself up, but the movement caused the sharp pain in his side to flare up with renewed force, and Bartolomeo fell back down, biting on his lip to stifle his groan as best as he could to avoid frightening the youth even further.
The burning sensation of red-hot iron in his stomach was all-consuming, and the blood loss left him dizzy and disoriented; but Escalus pushed through the haze that was threatening to swallow him and focused on his nephewâs pale, worried face above him.
âHey, youâre going to be okay, do you hear me? Iâve got you, just let me call the ambulance,â Mercutioâs lips quivered as he spoke, but he was otherwise keeping his panic in check. Desperately trying to smile, he dug out his mobile from the pocket of his jeans and hurriedly dialed the emergency number. Bartolomeo nodded.
âItâs not⊠that bad,â whom was he trying to fool? âBut a⊠an ambulance is a⊠good⊠idea,â he tasted blood on his tongue again and instantly knew he was not getting out of this one â at least not easily. But certainly he could endure until the hospital, could he not?.. Keep it together, Escalus, damn you!..
A wave of nausea hit him, and the coppery tang in his mouth mixed with sour bitterness. His eyes teared up, his throat was burning; violent coughs wracked his entire body, jostling the wound and magnifying the pain until it became almost unbearable. Bartolomeo tried to inhale but failed, choking on blood and bile, there was not enough air, he was going to suffocateâŠ
âŠbut then there were firm hands on his shoulders, and he was being pulled up and pressed against something warm and solid, and the rhythmical sound of a familiar voice was guiding him to calm down and breathe in â breathe out â breathe in â breathe outâŠ
âIâve got you, Iâve got you, just relax and breathe, breathe now, here we go, here we go...â chanted Mercutio, and though it was evident from the strain in his voice that the boy was scared, he still was holding up well. His words were helping, too â soon enough Bartolomeoâs lungs and throat began to obey him once more, bringing back the much-needed control over his injured body. He kept breathing steadily, slowly, following the monotonous rhythm of Mercutioâs voice.
The youth kept speaking â partly because of the calming effect it seemed to have on the wounded man, partly because he had to keep his own growing panic at bay. Incessant talking and chattering was what Mercutio had always been good it, so he clung to it as his best chance to keep his composure. âThe ambulance is on the way, and I called Paris, too, thought he should know, he says he will come directly, I only hope he wonât tell Val anything, but well, Paris is not stupid, he wonât⊠Hey, you with me?â he unconsciously grabbed Bartolomeoâs hand, squeezing it, shaking it slightly. âUncle! Hey! Donât you dare faint on me!â
âWouldnât dream of it,â groaned the elder Scaliger, pretending to be disgruntled but squeezing back. âYou and Valentine never let me rest quietly even in my own home, what chances do I have here in the street? BesidesâŠâ his speech was slurred, and his skin felt cold and clammy â a bad sign â but he stubbornly continued, âbesides, this doesnât really look⊠like my favourite couch, right?â
Mercutio chuckled gratefully at his feeble attempt at humour, and Bartolomeo felt him shift. His own body was sore, the pain still coiled in his side, deep and dangerous, hot and heavy but slowly morphing into a numbing weariness⊠he blinked, and his nephewâs face swam into his field of vision, blocking the bright street lamp, unruly curls falling forward and almost brushing against Bartolomeoâs own forehead. It was getting dark, and the light of the lantern above them was creating a bright halo around the youthâs head. Bartolomeo smiled at his own sentimental thought â angelic attributes definitely were at odds with Mercutioâs trickster image, yet at that moment the halo seemed somehow⊠fitting.
âStay with me,â whispered Mercutio, starting at him intently. âYou hear me?â
The siren of the ambulance howled faintly in the distance.
âStay with me.â
Mercutioâs eyes, shaded by his long hair, were dark and bright at the same time. Was the boy crying?.. Escalus smiled again and reached up to clasp his nephewâs shoulder reassuringly.
âI am not going anywhere. HeyâŠâ the siren was growing louder, closer. âNo need to worry Valentine for now. You willâŠâ
âI will inform Val myself later, donât worry,â Mercutio nodded, smiling through tears. âParis is about as gentle as a brick to the teeth, I know, with that eternal formality of his.â
âHeâs my employee; of course he is formal with you. Besides, havenât you yourself just used âinformâ instead of âtellâ not a moment ago?â teased Bartolomeo, pushing through the grey haze of nothingness once more. âPot and kettleâŠâ
âUncle! Are you saying I sound like an office rat?â Mercutioâs indignation would have sounded almost convincing if not for the tears in his voice. âIâll have you know that I am nothing of the kind!â
Escalus chuckled, genuinely amused.
âNow you sound bookish, nephew mine. IâŠâ
But he did not get to finish the thought, because the pain came back all of a sudden, and then he was coughing violently again, his whole body convulsing, and then there was a siren, and another siren, and people, and many voices, and one of them seemed familiar â was that Paris? Good, he would take care of everything â and about the boys, too â and then the coughing finally subsided, and he was being picked up and placed on the stretcher and carried somewhere â to the ambulance, you old fool, where else? â and Mercutio was at his side again, huge dark eyes full of tears, and Paris was next to him, as stern and thin-lipped as ever, and he was pulling Mercutio away, saying something insistently â but Mercutio wasnât having it.
âPromise me youâll be okay!â and Bartolomeo felt nephewâs cold fingers grasp his hand, the panic in his voice now painfully obvious. âPromise me! Youâve got to be okay! Uncle, please, you must promise!..â
Forcing his eyes open â when had he closed them? â Escalus looked into his nephewâs fear-stricken face and smiled.
He couldnât make such a promise, because there was a strong possibility it would end up broken; for all he knew, his wound could turn out to be very much deadly. But his nephew was asking him to stay alive, his nephew needed him, needed his comfort and reassurance â and Escalus could not deny him that.
âI promise.â
And as the doors of the ambulance slammed shut and the world around him began to descend into a whirlpool of pain and darkness, Bartolomeo della Scala closed his eyes with a peaceful sigh, secure in the knowledge that he would open them once again.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
Hi, I hope youâre doing great!! I had a fun (oops itâs actually kinda angsty) question. How do you think things would have gone had Luke been the one to die instead of Mara Jade in âsacrifice?â How do you think Mara (and Ben, Leia, Han, Jaima) wouldâve reacted? Thanks!
Aaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhmmmmmmm, NOT WELL LOL.
If you thought Luke decapitating Lumiya in what he thought was retaliation for Maraâs death, just imagine Mara on the vengeance warpath for her man.
Side note: neither one of them should have died in this scenario, itâs pure plot contrivance stupidity, both of them are smarter than that - not to mention how soundly Luke kicked Jacenâs ass later on while barely lifting a finger. BUT, for the hypothesisâ sake...
I mean, I donât think thereâs a lot to say beyond it would have been absolutely devastating and possibly destroyed the Skywalker-Solo family, or come close to it, once everybody figured out it was Jacen who killed his own uncle. I donât want to make it sound like killing Mara was secondary or less awful in any way, but itâs pretty damn heinous when family members kill their own blood. I could easily see Han and Leia disowning Jacen over it.
Ben Skywalker was skewed to have a closer relationship with his mother than his father, but it would have still been a traumatizing loss, especially if he had unreconciled feelings toward Luke that heâd never get a chance to talk out.
I think it would have left Mara a wreck. Sheâs resilient as hell and Iâm not saying she couldnât pull out of the tailspin eventually, but she and Luke anchored each other, and it would have not only been an intense struggle for her not to give in to hate and bloodlust in seeking revenge, but to also likely fall back into the abyss of guilt and self-recrimination that she had to grapple with in the wake of the Emperorâs death. If it was a true flip-flop scenario where Luke went off and got his ass killed alone, while Mara would surely resent him for doing that, sheâd also be blaming herself in a million ways for not having gone with him, not being there to fight alongside him and possibly prevent his death, etc. I think itâd be a steep, dark drop for her, and sheâd need a lot of support to climb back out - which could be difficult to come by because all the other members of the SkySolo clan would be grieving and hurting at the same time.
It would also be a huge blow to the Jedi Order, because even though Luke should have stepped away by the end of the NJO series, they were still leaning heavily on him (or he kept interfering, I donât really remember the distinction after all these years of not rereading this drivel). This would either potentially splinter them or serve as a silver lining by forcing them to finally suck it up and organize themselves without him.
If you havenât heard the song âlightâ by âsleeping at last,â you should give it a listen because there are MEGA Luke and Vader/Anakin vibes and itâs so sad and bittersweet