#deity work.

I was raised in a very contentious, high demand sector of the Christian faith. Who, like many of those, targets young ladies to be devoted mothers and tradwives. How I now view my practice is incredibly laxed not to an overarching degree. I think my love for Freyja is more so that She never truly demands things of me but my best efforts and growth. It doesn't mean I don't offer Her items and poetry and writings and more importantly my thoughts. My Norse Heathenry and Celtic path has offered me freedom. That may seem dramatic but when you're raised in practically a cult who, who despises the church from trauma, when a Goddess like Freyja reaches out it is freedom.

In one of my readings with her, about three or four weeks after my dad passed away, She said She was my steadfast companion and that Her protection surrounds me. I have felt it heavily, like fjaðrhamr surrounds me while we talk, when I tell Her my grief or when I just sit and cry to her. A lot of days I can't function, I feel like I'm stuck in knee high mud, trying to walk and trying to function. My grief counselor says that still trying to do chores and work is a process of grief, still doing those things despite how prickly it feels is grieving, is trying.

I felt Her there immediately when the hospital called at 330 AM telling me he passed. Especially when we sat in the lobby of the hospital. I think she didn't want me to see him in such a state because he was gone. That She protected me from seeing him like that, protected me and my mother from seeing him gone. Meanwhile I detested it, I wanted closure, I realized that She was right. She was aware of the downward spiral it would have sent me and for that I am grateful also.

This is just the end of my ramblings, my thoughts, maybe a little sad but to be expected. I just love and appreciate the Goddess, Freyja. My steadfast companion and an absolute companion to many of us.