#dehumanizing thoughts

Kolt sighed softly to himself. Penelope would be alright. She was honestly lucky she didn't have any squishy bits. She was effectively immortal in a way because of it, though if whatever part of her that connects her to her body remotely were destroyed, that would be the end of her until they could find her real body.

He hated to think it, but it was honestly a very lucky thing that Penelope had been the one who had been shot. Anyone else would have been very, very dead.

But Gale had hurt her. Had tried very hard to kill her, even. Gale likely didn't know that Penelope wasn't human. What if she had been and Kolt had lost a new friend to his old friend? This was serious. Gale might still be in there somewhere. Kolt could still draw him back out, but could Kolt risk the lives of his new friends and allies for that? He didn't know the answer to that yet.

Kolt let his mind drift away from that to memories of Gale when they had first met. That scrawny young man who had swaggered up to him in a night club, declared he knew who Kolt was, and demanded to work with him. Kolt had scoffed at him in his stretched out clothing and blood drying on his knuckles, but Gale had been so persistent. Kolt had to say yes, eventually, because Gale was really good at looking out for Kolt. He had been a fantastic body guard, then a fantastic henchman, and then a fantastic friend.

He had risked everything for Kolt, putting everything aside to put together a new identity to sneak into that lab and rescue Kolt, only to be taken and put in Kolt's place on Dr. LeAnne's operating table.

Kolt missed him. He missed Gale so much that his throat and chest hurt with it.

Still, there was comfort in such memories, in a way. It was the same feeling as pressing a bruise. It hurt, but it reminded you what it was like to be alive.

Morning came eventually, though Kolt didn't sleep. He wasn't sure he would be able to until everyone he cared about was safe or someone put him out of misery and drugged him.

Perhaps he could just settle for Penelope being safe.

Indigo got up, seemingly after a very good four hours of sleep and packed everything up, tidying the area and writing down what supplies they used in the clipboard on the counter. Kolt forgot how well organized the Dragon Gang's safe houses were.

Eventually, dressed in civilian clothing they had found in the closet and walked out into the morning sunlight. It was still cool, though it was starting to get quite hot during the days, and today was looking to be one of those days.

Indigo and Kolt walked side by side down the sidewalk, watching casually for anyone that might be following them.

"Can I ask you a question?" Kolt asked.

"Sure," Indigo said.

"Are you related to Lynx? You, Player, and Orion look a lot like him."

Indigo chuckled. "No, we're not related, but we look like him on purpose. Phoenix decided that Lynx needed some extra protection as his right hand man while he was out and about. He built Shadow Six, our team, as a gift for Lynx, actually. Some of us look like Lynx so it's harder to pick him out and kill him right away in our group."

Kolt whistled softly. "Now that is a tactic."

"Yes. Though... there has been some talk about the Resource program possibly using some sort of genetic manipulation. We all came from the same batch of Resources, Lynx included. Kind of weird so may of us would look so similar."

Kolt nodded thoughtfully. "I think I would have to agree with you."

Indigo shrugged. "Anyway. We don't mind it... Lynx is a good leader."

"So he is," Kolt murmured.

They are quiet for another block or so before Indigo cleared his throat. "Could I ask you a question?"

"Yes."

"That was Gale?"

"Yes," Kolt said.

"How did you escape?"

Kolt sighed. "One of my hallucinations got me out of his hands but he was fairly receptive to me after that. It looks like the scientists attempted to brainwash him. He was confused but he seemed to remember a couple of things. I thought I had almost convinced him to come with me, but then he bolted."

Indigo nodded. "Do you think he is receptive enough to be saved?"

"I think so," Kolt said. "After last night, I don't think the scientists will be able to fully quell the doubts I put in his head, but it will be difficult to get to him again. And I have no idea how long it will be before we see him out in the open again. I get the feeling he is going to be severely punished for how things played out last night."

Indigo winced faintly, though he didn't ask anything else for the rest of the trip, leaving Kolt to think about his interaction with Gale, trying to recall as much detail as he could from the encounter.

.....................................................................................................

Penelope already disliked her existence, in most ways. It wasn't natural, and somewhere, deep down or far away, she knew that. It hurt when she thought about it too long. Like she was trying to think in a format that wasn't supported. Like she had her her flesh crystallized and it was cutting into itself with it's new found sharp angles.

Existing was, understandably, worse than normal. She was scattered across the room in pieces. She could feel where the anchor pieces that kept her within the body were still intact. A hand here, which twitched a little among the remnant pieces of fingers. Her thigh, which was still laying among the pieces yet to be sorted. Her right shoulder, which she didn't think had actually made it all the way here and was laying in a forgotten street corner somewhere. And, of course, her head. Everything else was just an empty ache, occasionally flaring with incomprehensible pain as her systems sent out another set of signals to figure out what was still functioning.

Her head was gently propped up in layers of cushions, what remained of her hair pulled back in a tail to keep it out of her face.

She was trying very hard not to have a meltdown as she watched Terry and Bret sort through the pieces, identifying things and marking them as salvageable or not. The two were holding a conversation, cheerful and gossipy to take Penelope's mind off of what was happening. Off of how ugly and unnatural she felt.

"Say, Penny, have you heard about the drama that Krissy has been involved in?" Bret asked.

Penelope blinked quickly, trying to reach into her storage to find the memory of who Krissy even was. She had a lot of her short term memory storage and bits and pieces of long term storage here and there, but it seemed Krissy was in the missing portions.

"Remind me who Krissy is?" Penelope said, trying to keep her tone light, hoping that it was alright she didn't remember Krissy.

There was a flash of worry on Bret's face and Penelope had to fight off a fresh wave of misery. He covered his slip up with a smile and said, "She works in the cafeteria. She's the one that gives me extra applesauce on the sly and sometimes comes up to chat with us when we're working."

Penny really should have known Krissy, then. She didn't have records of even a single conversation with the woman. Was it all gone? Would she be starting over from scratch with everyone here? What if she had forgotten something important? Why didn't she back up her memory storage when she had the chance? She was going to be useless around here if she had forgotten half of what she knew about criminal organizations. She could only hope she had already sent a large chunk of her memories to Phoenix's servers.

Maybe she had made a backup and she had just forgotten about it?

"So, Krissy has this thing for Chet, right? And a few weeks ago he actually asked her on a date, so they've been going out," Bret said.

"Wait, isn't Chet married?" Terry asked, looking up from the mangled remains of Penny's chest plate.

"Yes! Yes he is," Bret said. "He didn't tell Krissy that, and Krissy had no idea. So they were going out on dates and they got pretty far along. And then Krissy finds out about Chet's wife."

Terry hissed through his teeth and Penelope searched through the memory she had access to desperately for any mention of Krissy. She wanted to be involved like she was supposed to be!

"Exactly! Krissy was telling me her plans for how she's going to deal with him. Full scorched earth. She's getting Phoenix involved at some point."

Penelope felt Bret's words fade as panic set in. She couldn't hyperventilate, she couldn't try and catch her breath as she didn't even have lungs. She felt something whir unhappily in her head as she struggled to control her emotions. She was fine. She was going to be fine.

She was just a singed head among a pile of scraps. She couldn't help herself. She could only sit there and hope that everyone would be gentle with her parts.

She was drawn back into the present as the door opened and Kolt entered wearing civilian clothing and his regular glasses.

Penelope had been told Kolt was fine and would just take a while to reach base, but she was more relieved than she could express upon actually laying eyes on him.

"Kolt," she said.

"Penny!" Kolt gasped, making his way to her and hovering his hand just over her cheek. "Heralines, Penny, I'm so sorry!"

Penelope felt the shame and horror crash into her fully and openly sobbed as he cupped her face, pressing his forehead to hers. She barely paid attention to the reassurances he offered her as she cried herself into shutdown.

Part 37

A.N. - Hello everyone! I'm trying out a new format for posts. I thought this would be more satisfying, I suppose. And I like doing notes at the bottom now so that I can talk about things I liked writing about in the chapter. i was deeply excited about Kolt and Penny meeting up again at the end of this chapter. Their friendship is so cute to me! Thank you for reading and please leave me a comment or reblog if you are so inclined. <3

Crestlen taglist: @looptheloup @kira-the-whump-enthusiast @snakebites-and-ink @starsick1979 @antlerfish