This takes place during a Modern College AU. Dan has had feelings for Phil for a while but has been too nervous to tell him. Now that he's been dragged to a college party (against his own will), he gets his one chance to tell Phil how he feels. But will he carry through? Maybe a lesson in ballroom dancing will tell. Also, here are Dan and Phil's outfits!
Dan sighed and leaned against the railing of the balcony as he took another sip of his beer. Looking up at the star-studded sky, his mind raced with varying thoughts about the previous day, but they always circled back to one person:
Ever since that one history lecture a month ago, Dan couldn’t keep his mind off of Phil. Dan remembered the scenario like it was yesterday. The lecture had just begun when Phil had bolted through the door, completely out of breath, and apologizing to the professor for being late. Phil made his way over and took a seat next to Dan, not knowing that Dan’s own heart was beating like a kick drum.
As the lecture progressed, Dan couldn’t help but steal glances at Phil, captivated by his every movement as he took in the professor's words, admiring the way his ginger hair fell against his forehead and the way his cerulean eyes lit up in interest. When the class finally ended, Dan, with bated breath, gathered his courage and struck up a conversation with Phil. The two seemed to get along pretty easily, yet Dan still couldn’t look Phil in the face without blushing madly.
With each passing day, Dan found himself looking forward to seeing Phil in class, their various conversations becoming the highlight of his day. The more they spent time together, the more Dan began to realize that what started as a simple infatuation for Phil had blossomed into more than a crush. It was deeper. A love that he never expected to find in his life. Even more, Dan was struggling to accept himself as a closeted gay man. He remembered being bullied for most of his childhood for that same reason. Thankfully over the years, things had changed, and society had become more accepting of the LGBTQ+ community, but Dan continued to keep this secret locked inside his heart. His parents knew he was gay, but very few people outside of his family knew that big secret. And now that he had an actual crush on Phil, his mind raced with a thousand “what ifs,” each one pulling him in a different direction. But deep down, as hard as it was to swallow, the truth was that he knew he couldn’t keep his feelings for Phil hidden forever. The thought of never knowing if Phil felt the same way for him was a burden too heavy to bear.
His thoughts were then interrupted as he saw Phil walk towards the balcony with a small margarita in his hands. Dan’s palms began to sweat, and his heartbeat quickened. Oh god, oh god, oh god! Okay, stay calm! He thought to himself. Just don’t draw any attention to yourself, and everything will be fine. Dan continued to distract himself with another sip of beer, looking up at the stars above. Hopefully, he prayed, Phil would just leave and he wouldn’t have to worry about his increasing heart rate.
“Stars look nice tonight, don’t they?”
Startled, Dan did a spit-take like it was straight out of a cartoon and let out a series of coughs. He put a hand to his chest to gather his bearings and took a deep breath. Unbeknownst to him, Phil turned his head towards him. “Woah, you okay?” He asked, giggling. “Must’ve gone down the wrong way, huh?”
Oh, god, he noticed! Dan thought, his internal voice filled with straight-up anxiety. He wanted to run away, he WANTED to. But he knew that if he stayed silent, Phil was gonna think he was being rude, and he certainly didn’t want to be that way in front of his crush. Dan knew he had no other choice. He had to talk to him.
Dan looked up and gulped as he saw Phil standing before him, wearing a loose red silk shirt that had some cleavage showing a bit of chest hair, and black dress pants. DAMN, he’s hot. Dan thought. Phil gazed at Dan with an inquisitive look on his face, waiting for a response. “U-uh yeah, I’m fine.” He chuckled nervously as he adjusted the collar of his jacket. “I guess I was caught off guard, is all.” Phil laughed as he took another sip of his margarita. “Yeah, sorry about that.” He apologized. “I just saw you on the balcony and wanted to talk with you. I didn’t even know you were gonna be here.”
Dan sighed. “I really didn’t want to, to be honest. My friends kinda made me go. Said I needed more, ‘social interaction.’” He said with finger quotes. Phil laughed. “Yeah, being social isn’t the easiest thing. I have trouble talking to others too. Thankfully, I’m a lot better at it than I was a few years ago. I literally had such bad phone anxiety that I had to get my mom to call the hairdressers to set up an appointment for me because I couldn’t do it myself. It was THAT bad!” The two men laughed at Phil’s statement. “I’m glad we have something in common then.” Dan stated, taking one last sip of his beer before throwing it in a small recycling bin.
A few seconds of awkward silence stood before them. C’mon, make some small talk! Dan’s inner voice encouraged. He cleared his throat and spoke up. “So, how’s the semester been so far?” “It’s been fine,” Phil replied. “Other than the massive amount of homework. But I guess that’s what you get as a linguistics major.” He chuckled. “You’re not alone on that.” Added Dan. “Law school has had me up to my neck in homework. It’s literal hell if you ask me!”
As the music from inside the party room faded in the distance, the two college students continued to converse, talking about life at home, their favorite hobbies, and anything that came to mind. Slowly, Dan saw himself falling more and more in love with Phil. It took every fiber in his body not to grab Phil by the front of his shirt and kiss him passionately. He knew that if he did that, Phil would think he was coming on too strong. Or maybe he didn’t have the same feelings for him. It would only end up embarrassing Dan more.
As Dan looked again at the sky, Phil stared at him with glimmering cerulean eyes, smiling with contempt and infatuation for the man who stood before him. He placed his margarita on a nearby table and held out his hand towards Dan.
Dan’s eyes widened, and he jerked his head towards Phil, who continued to hold out his hand as he walked towards the center of the balcony, smiling warmly at Dan. Dan felt like his heart skipped two beats. He couldn’t believe it; no, this wasn’t real. His own crush, whom he had only known for a month, was asking him to dance! Not only that but he had never been asked to dance with anyone before in his life. The same “what if” scenarios began to plague his mind.
He wanted to; his heart was telling him “YES,” but his mind held him back, and he continued to grip the balcony ledge tightly, so much so that his knuckles began turning white. Phil chuckled as he noticed Dan’s nervous expression. “Well, what do you say?”
“I-I, um…” Dan stuttered as he nervously adjusted his jacket. “A-are you sure?”
Phil smiled sincerely. “Dan, I wouldn’t be standing in the middle of a balcony with my hand out if I didn’t.”
Slowly and trepidatiously, Dan made his way to the center of the balcony. His hand shook violently as he reached out to accept Phil’s hand. Dan let out a silent gasp. Phil’s hands were soft and warm, unlike his own, which were probably dripping with sweat. Hopefully, Phil wouldn’t notice.
All of a sudden, Phil caught Dan off guard and pulled him in, placing a hand on his hip while holding his other hand up. “Don’t worry, it’s just a simple waltz.” He reassured Dan in a soft voice that sent shivers down Dan’s spine. Phil squeezed Dan’s hand tightly and pulled him closer. Dan’s face turned bright red, and he swore Phil could hear his heartbeat pounding inside his chest. “Hey, relax your shoulders. You’re tense. Just take a deep breath, and I’ll lead you.”
Dan swallowed the lump gathering in his throat as Phil led him in a waltz around the balcony. As the duo began to move together, Phil’s gentle guidance became a lifeline for Dan, easing his nerves with each step. There were a few times when Dan stumbled a bit, but Phil patiently encouraged him, his hands firm yet gentle to the touch as he led Dan through the waltz.
With each turn, Dan felt himself become more and more relaxed in the rhythm of the dance. All those fears and worries that ran through his mind before suddenly faded away. As they twirled around underneath the glow of the moonlight, Dan felt his heart swell with a new feeling of joy and confidence. At that moment, he realized it wasn’t about being perfect, but about the connection he shared with Phil. The movement of their bodies in sync with the music spoke volumes without them having to utter a single word. Phil laughed as he gazed at Dan’s brown eyes, making the younger man blush.
As the music drew to a close, Phil chuckled. Dan lifted an eyebrow in confusion. “What-whoah!” Phil caught Dan by surprise and dipped him. Dan shut his eyes and nearly fell to the ground, but Phil placed a firm hand around his waist, keeping him in place. Dan slowly opened his eyes, and his face turned as red as Phil’s shirt when he saw that Phil’s face was mere inches from his own. Dan’s forehead dripped with sweat, making his hair more curlier than it already was.
Phil laughed and winked. “Haha, caught you off guard, didn’t I? Works every time.”
Phil leaned back up and loosened his grip on Dan. Dan stepped back and breathed a sigh of relief. “Well, what did you think?” Phil asked. “Uh, i-it was…great,” Dan replied, though it really was AMAZING, but he couldn’t tell Phil that. “Where did you learn to dance like that?”
“My mum enrolled me in ballroom dancing lessons when I was in secondary school. Looks like they paid off.” Phil chuckled.
“Yeah, well, thanks for teaching me then. I never thought I’d actually get the hang of it.” Dan replied sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck, which he wasn’t sure was sweating due to the intense dancing they just did or his own nerves. At this point, he didn't really care anymore.
A few moments of silence stood between the two. The duo shifted their weight awkwardly from foot to foot, unsure of what to say next. Thankfully, Dan’s phone buzzed in his back pocket. He pulled it out to see it was a text from PJ.
PJ: Hey, me and Chris are gonna head back for the rest of the night. Care to join us?
Dan sighed. Maybe this time, it was too late to tell Phil. He looked back up at the ginger-haired man. “Well, uh, I should probably get going. My friends said they were gonna head back to the dorms for the night.” He made his way towards the doors that led to the main party room. “And again,” he paused. “Thanks for the dance. I had a lot of fun.”
The two men exchanged sincere smiles. “You’re welcome.” Phil replied gladly.
Dan turned around and was about to step inside. “So, yeah, good night then…”
“Huh?” Dan spun around to see Phil standing in front of him, grabbing his hand. Phil spoke breathlessly. “One last thing before you leave. I wanna send you home with this.”
Before Dan could form any words, Phil stepped forwards and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. Dan’s heart skipped a beat or maybe it stopped altogether.
Phil Lester, the man he admired for so long, was kissing him.
Dan’s mind raced, trying to process the suddenness of Phil’s gesture, but all he could focus on was the warmth of Phil’s lips against his own, and the softness of Phil’s touch as he cupped his hand around Dan’s cheek. Dan closed his eyes, fully embracing the kiss, wrapping his arms around Phil's neck.
After a few seconds, the two pulled away for air. Dan’s cheeks flushed a bright pink and Phil’s lips curled into a dazed smile. “Woah…” Dan breathed, his voice barely above a whisper. “W-why did you….”
“I’ve seen the way you’ve looked at me Dan.” Phil admitted, his fingers tangled in the latter’s curly hair. “And I want to let you know I feel the same way. I love you. And I’ve been wanting to do this for a while.” His voice was barely audible over the pounding of Dan’s heart.
Dan’s smile widened as he reached up to clasp Phil’s hand that was resting against his cheek. Tears brimmed the surface of his eyes. "I’m SO glad you did.” He murmured before leaning in to embrace Phil’s lips in a kiss of his own, this time more passionately. As the two stood there, covered in the warmth of each other's embrace, a smile crept across Dan’s lips.
He already knew the response to PJ’s text.
Thanks for reading this! Fun fact-the background song for the kiss scene i made myself and I also made a slight reference to the song "Hearts on Fire" from the Rocky IV movie by using the first four notes from the chorus. Hope you guys like it!