#deerbra

A Real Nigga “Doe”

Hottie in the Headlights

A Modern Deerbra

Bambi Badazz

Femme Fawn

Damn Shorty you fawn as hell .

Fawn in flora.

I was on the highway and a fucking baby

was running on the highway.

Yeah, I know, right? Shit's crazy.

So I get out of the car,

I start chasing the baby.

In my mind, I'm like,

'Why're you running, baby?'

That's what I'm thinking, right?

I'm like, 'What do you do?'

‘Cause I can't just grab the baby and throw

the baby in the car, that's kidnapping.

I fuck around and go to jail.

I got a little butt, I'll get raped.

I know they'll fucking rape me in jail.

I ain't trying to get raped.

So I had to make a decision.

I was like, 'Shit, what do I do?'

So I decided to adopt the baby.

What I did was, I downloaded this app on

my iPhone, this Adopt the Baby app, right?

I put the barcode on the baby head. Boop!

That way the baby knew he was my baby.

I put the baby in the

car, I go to pull off,

I turn around,

a deer was running towards the car.

So I'm like, 'Oh, shit!

This deer is about to eat the baby!'

That's what I'm thinking, right?

But then I looked closer, I noticed

the front part of the deer was a deer,

the back half was a zebra.

It was half deer, half zebra.

So I'm like, 'Oh, shit! It's a deerbra!'

Like, that's what I'm thinking,

'It's a fucking deerbra.'

So I call the zoo, I'm like,

'Yo, there's a fucking deerbra

out here on the highway!'

He was like, 'What's that?'

I was like, 'Half deer, half zebra.'

He was like, 'Did you just make that up?'

I was like, 'I think so.'

Um...

He said, 'Well, bring it down.'

So I get down there, he sees it, he's like,

'Oh, shit, it's half deer, half zebra!'

I said, 'That's what I was trying

to tell you on the phone, it's a deerbra.

He was like, Okay, what do you want?

Do you want money for it?'

I said, No, I don't

have that type of time.

'I gotta get back to the car because

my new son is in the car by hisself.

So I get back to the car, turns out, the

baby that I thought was a baby wasn't a baby.

It was a grown-ass man

with Benjamin Button disease.

Let me tell you how I figured this out.

I figured this out, ' cause

when I got to the car, the baby woke up.

I was like, 'Hey, I'm your new dad.

I've just adopted you.

He was like,

'You ain't my dad, bitch! I'm 65.

I said, 'Goddamn!' He

said, 'I got a disease.

I was like, 'You got

that Benjamin Button.

He was like, 'Where's my deerbra?

(confident face)

I said, 'I knew that was a

fucking deerbra, I knew it was.

I just took it to the zoo.

He was like, 'Well, how the fuck

am I supposed to get home?

(strange face)

I said, 'You ride that motherfucker, man?

Anyway, long story short,

that's why I'm five minutes late for work,

'cause it took a long-ass time for me