#december1st2018

Pictures from these days

Bob sent me the band Bonny Doon. Now I’m listening to Ricewine which is equally as chill as the Bonny Doon band. Big News! I found the missing piece to that stupid puzzle. I don’t know exactly where is came from, but it just appeared and I’m happy that puzzle doesn’t have a missing piece now. Pretty excited. but got in clean mode so I swept the entire house and cleaned that fan and mopped a little. Nice to have a clean house. If I just do a little everyday it won’t get bad.

Cont. on 11/22

I have to get a washer and dryer. Maybe that’s what I’ll get with my hopeful bonus. Mild orange was next on youtube and they are solid as well. I have plans to meet up at Dillinger with Tsvet and James and possibly more. I’ll definitely throw on a different shirt and.

I saw you in that chair a look and gaze

Lunch was fun with James and Tsvet as well as Dee and Dennis, and the lady in the corner. I like the Dillinger. I go the Ruben and it was solid and some patron. Man, tequila is so good. I’m going to get a bottle for home. I kind of hope Luna doesn’t come over, but with my luck, she probably will. So just got downtown. She’s going to be a little late so I’ll go get a drink at the bar and pee all . I hope it goes well!

Cont. on 11/21

I can’t believe Luna still won’t text me back. I feel bad for her situation. Like, she has the worst luck. I can’t believe he would just hit, Dalton, and while living together. ridiculous. I may- well if she ever texts me back, then maybe I would consider having her come live here. We could car pool and jam and I think it would be fun. Make some vegan food together and just chill all the time. I don’t think I would mind having her around all the time. I’ve tried and whenever I see her shes always super excited to see me. So maybe I just have to but upfront about it and just be like “Hey, I like you, and u was wandering if you wanted to go on a date some time if you’re interested. If not, no biggy. I’m stoked to just be your friend and I’d be 100% okay with keeping it that way. no hard feelings or anything like that. So yeah, I mean we already know each other. but this would be a way for use to get to know each other ore and on a more deeper level. we can talk about sex and stuff like that and see what we both like. Do drugs together and just have a lot of fun. Could be cool if she ever texted back...

Cont. on 11/20

What do I like about Luna?

She has this like nervous laugh that I find adorable. She’ just comfortable. The right height to fit under my arm. That might have been the highlight of my night. Cuddling right up to her. Only way it could have been better is if she put her arm around me. But the head nuzzle worked just as well. I feel she just seem me as a friend and that’s okay. There’s only one way to find out and it just to ask her. Tomorrow night. I’ll go chill at my folks or maybe find something free to do downtown or I can hit up Evan and see what he’s doing. Or maybe I’ll just go chill and walk around DT a little. Possibilities are almost endless. Definitely maybe won’t hit her up. Are you interested in dating at all. I know you might not be be interested and getting out of your relationship. So I completely understand if you’re not down, and this will be the last we talk about it. I just have developed feeling and I wanted to se if you felt to same way. Nothing to lose really. One of the reasons I went to the show last night was to see her. Mission accomplished. Well see, I probably won’t cause I don’t want to make things awkward. So, that's probably the better option.

Cont. on 11/19

Also, she doesn’t smoke cigs, shes open to drugs, she doesn’t drink much which I would be adamant that I won’t drink when she doesn’t drink. She’d fit right on the back of my bike. One that I’m getting with my bonus. I feel we would have a good relationship and would be happy together. I understand depression, and would want to have an open policy on communication cause that is very very important.

Cont. on 11/16

I don’t know if I’m going to  continue using this pen. It’s a little too much bleed through. It’s not to bad once you write. I thought maybe I would have a hard time reading but it looks okay. I’ll keep using the pen for now. Attempted to make pretzels with the pizza dough. I left and I turned out eggy. I think my water wasn’t hot enough or it was just not that great dough. Oh well. It’ll build a turd. I’ll probably make a BLT later for dinner. but really. I’ve eat plenty for today. Well see. I’ll get a wire brush and get the rest of that just out of there. Get a propane tank and itll be cool. I’ll boil those eggs tonight for sure and that’ll be my b-fast and lunch. Cook all that bacon. I’ll bake it so I don’t have to deal with is in a pan. and I’ll be able to get it nice and crispy! It’ll be delicious. AND she listened to music and likes to go to shows! I wold be the absolute best! So how do you think she sees me? Someone who drinks a ton. She knows all about my touring. I would also be 100% okay with her on tour. no problem with that at all.

Cont. on 11/15

I know I want someone that will help me learn or better me. Okay. Bonus equals home gym stuff and guitar. After this trip I’ll get a desk and get that stuff all set up. I’ll see if she has . I can drop her off in the morning and get her a coffee, then go to the gym to kill time. That does sound like a good plan. Then she can chill there or do something. I’d definitely let her take my car. I can get a ride gone from someone. If she wanted to go out. That might actually be good. Just to get that time alone. I’m down. If it gets. It’s not going to get awkward. It’s not like I’m asking her to be with me forever, I just feel like it could be fun. and if that happens, I will definitely get rid of FB. I feel once I do get a girl, I will just get rid of it and set up - I’ll wait till I get the band page going. Goal - Release 2 albums next year or EP’s whatever. I just want some music out there. I’ll make it happen. 2019 is going to be a good and productive year. No drink December starts now. I can do it. Yesterday I already knew that was happening before to deal to no drink to NYE!

Cont. on 11/14

Still not surprised that I spent $5600 on alcohol this year. I probably bumped it up to $5700 yesterday for sure. That ends now! That’s easily a trip to anywhere for a couple weeks. So bad. Cut down on food and booze and I will be doing great! I’ll find an easy recipe for something I can eat all week. Some chicken something. Make some perogies. It’ll be delicious. Invite James and Tsvet over. Find a good Perogie sauce. Keep it vegan hopefully. Id also be down to seriously cut down on my meat eating. I had a nice lunch with my sister today. I hope she quits that job and finds something else. And Zeb just sucks. I know why she doesn’t want to be with him and why she feels she can’t get a divorce. It’s scary. Especially for her. Be so hard to get Makayla over there unless all her rules just goes away. Cut his house, then she would just hate being over at Mel s. I think she will do it soon cause I wouldn’t deal with that for that long. Especially with his separate account. Not that having a separate account is bad, but it was kept secret. So crazy. That guy sucks.

Cont. on 11/13

Date with Gabby.

She was very nice and I did have a lot of fun. From Baltimore. Graduating next May from ASU. Lives with her folks. Has Type 1 diabetes which sucks. Net a natural red head but likes it. We started out at Artiface, we talked about her brothers show and how it went. she said it went really well. Told her about my tour life and stuff like that and stuff. She was super into horoscopes which is worrying. But really I’m not down. I’m pretty sure that I wont see her again. There was just no physical attraction. I don’t want to have to fake a whole aspect of a relationship just to save her feelings. Just it’s not happening. So, I’ll just have to break it of gently. Something like I had a lot of fun and you’re a cool person, but I don’t think we should continue to hang out anymore. I just didn’t feel anything and it’s not going to progress any more that it has so just do not waste your time or should just keep it like this and if we see each other by chance well say high and stuff. and keep if from getting awkward. Something like that should work! Next tie she ask about it I’ll bring in up and hope it goes good.

Cont. on 11/12

I think they are going to be alright. The eggs that is. I’m hard boiling 12 of them so that's 2 a day plus two days where I’ll get three. We can do Tuesday and Thursday. I’ll find a good recipe tomorrow. gotta take a break from pizza. I be I can lose 10 lbs by the christmas party. Especially if I’m not drinking. It’ll be easy. Work out stuff. Eggs are done. Bacon gets like 15 minutes. I may take a bath here shortly or tonight I should say. I’ll get all my shopping done on Sunday. Not drinking will cut the cost of this trip by a ton. I will have one with lunch but other than that no more. just tell them  I’m on a hiatus. They won’t care. It really is no big deal. Tomorrow I’ll take some week and call it good! Save my a ton on money and I won’t feel like garbage on Tuesday. Well, I guess I won’t be cooking tomorrow unless I just come home and leave for the show. I wonder how may extra miles that would be, but it doesn’t matter. Its’ only a couple bucks to not have to kill like 5 hours. So yeah, I’ll come home after work. Make some good and chill, then I’ll head out.

Cont. on 11/10-11/12

I’m more that likely going to roll after Beemaster. Probably watch a song or two of the touring guy to see how they are. Cool, I’ll stay. Not cool, I’m going to rolling after Beemaster. Sorry dude but I have to be up early and I don’t want to be out till the wee hours of the morning for some band. I’ve never heard of. I will ask Luna out and see how that goes before I figure out if I should ask Vivian. I still think I’m not “cool” enough to date her. I would definitely need to step up my wardrobe, or she does like who I am but I could be fun to get dressed up and stuff like that. Lint roller tomorrow so I can wear my blue sweater but tomorrow. Wake up at 5. No snooze go for a run. Shave and shower. Work a little early. Wrap up that stupid 945 west 8th. That job can suck it! Hopefully we’ll be slow this week. I’ll take this with me and get it filled up. I could have filled up so much if I had this at work. Oh well. Either way, I’m jamming music tomorrow and no one can stop me! Friday I will do perogies. Have Ty and Melka and Tsvet and James and I’ll see if Luna is down. Be Like a triple date! Tell the to bring a game!

Cont. on 11/9

BLT was good. I used ricotta instead of mayo since I didn’t have any. I was even at the store too. I could be having some good food, but I was lazy! I need to stop doing that. Tsvet last night just I mean. It’s awesome that they do enjoy it as well. I’ll see if Luna want to come and I’ll do the vegan pirogies. If not, I’ll do the regular ones. Make the. I’ll make the dough and filling the day before, or all of it before, then just boil and fry and they will be golden. Do Like a salad or get some hummus. Borrow their food processor and make some hummus. Slice up some veggies or find a polish side dish and see. What I can fins. Maybe there's some good stuff if not. Hummus it is. I can do two different kinds. Do traditional and tn maybe find a jalapeno hummus. Then cucumbers cherry tomato's, something. I’ll do a onion mushroom top for the perogies. If they're at the show tomorrow I’ll ask the. I’ll shoot them all a message tomorrow. Should be a good time. I know Ty will be down. Still want to have a variety of people over instead of same people all the time.

Cont. on 11/8

I wonder if I can convert the kitchen to gas if I bought this house. I would tear down this wall. Lift the ceiling and just open this house up! but I  do like the setup the way it is. It’s a pretty cute house but who knows. I may bot stay out here and go live in the bus and rent a warehouse or try and by a place with an apartment. I wander how much it'll cost? Maybe just being single is the way to go for a little while later. Maybe not try so hard. I’ll still talk to Luna though. but its just so easy to be myself. and, I took them for granite for sure. I’lI don’t know she wasn't’ right for me, but we had a lot of fun. Disney all the time, living together and working. I got over KC and Rainy. They were just way too much unfortunately. Their family is just way too much. I just wanted to stay home and play video games. I’m happy that is not a hobby anymore. Spent so much time playing games. They are really fond memories, but just doesn’t do it for me like it used too. Crazy how that have changed. I’ve changed a bunch these past couple years.

Cont. on 11/7

My blood pressure was like 14 over 92 with a heart rate of 102. I was just all high and probably because of how much I drank last night. 3 shots and 5 beers in 3.5hours on an empty stomach. I was pretty drunk unfortunately. At least I don’t have to worry about it. I’m so better at life sober so I don’t know why. I just want to feel something. Binging everything to take my mind off things. but I feel if I keep up with the writing I think I will be alright. I don’t need it, I just want it. Lately I’ve been not super happy with myself when I get super drunk. It’s just not fun anymore. I make bad decisions and just don’t do good. So I think I may just have to cut it out completely. It would be like changing my whole life. Bit I think I’m okay with it. I’ll be able to get a lot of things done and I can work more on music and other hobbies. I do want to get into wood working just because it seems fulfilling. We’ll see. I do have time to do these things I’m only 32 and I have a lot of years left to live!

Cont. on 11/6