#death process

Moon, 27 Aquarius - February 15th, 2018

Death is not to be delayed—it is the unfurling of the lotus in moonlight, hidden throughout the day, a magic available only to those who stay up past their bedtime. Our fear of such is unnatural, like a door we’re told never to open. A shaman taught me that our entire lives are lived in preparation for death, the final journey. The symbolic deaths experienced during ceremony would offer glimpses into the other worlds that in our technology-drenched ecosystem we couldn’t even begin to fathom.

In Denis Villeneuve’s brilliant film of extraterrestrial contact, Arrival, the lead character’s tragic confrontation with death hinges on the survival of the human race. The extraterrestrials’ amorphous, time-bending language seems to suggest that death is not the end, not as we know it. 

As eclipses are often times of great beginnings, they also harbor the power to end. Unless you’re offered an appropriate awareness, this power can manifest in ways that feel utterly overwhelming to the core. That could be the point, however—instead of searching for ways to dilute your experience, whether it be through projections, virtual media, or feeling good about paying your taxes, allow the pain of something being wrong with the people on this planet to wash over you, and understand that there is probably no hope for life as we know it. Even from a purely practical, scientific standpoint, it’s not hard to come to this conclusion. And no, cool as it sounds, we will not live on in robots. Do a little research, pull back the curtain, you’ll see the wizard. 

Since the eclipse is in Aquarius—on my birthday, no less—light pondering is in order. Perhaps a seance will summon beings from another world to take us on an archetypal journey to kill God. What would life truly be with the death of one assumed creator, a true devil rampaging senseless destruction across the entire planet? To many, killing God is the death of their entire reality as they know it. But, what if there is more to this reality? What if devoting yourself to God is the truest sin? Reading these words might send some into a fury—silence the thoughts lest they spread further, and further, as sense settles into the brain, the illusion shattering, knowing full well that I am correct.   

In Back to Methuselah, George Bernard Shaw writes of an encounter with Father Addis, who was attempting to convert him to Catholicism. “I grant you a maker of God. I grant you a maker of the maker of God. I grant you a long line of makers as you please; but an infinity of makers is unthinkable and extravagant: it is no harder to believe in number one than in number fifty thousand or fifty million; so why not accept number one and stop there, since no attempt to get behind him will remove your logical difficulty?” Shaw responded, “By your leave, it is as easy for me to believe that the universe made itself as that a maker of the universe made himself: in fact much easier; for the universe visibly exists and makes itself as it goes along, whereas a maker for it is a hypothesis.” After much deliberating, the father revealed that “he should go mad if he lost his belief.”   

"Tests of faith," at the end of the day, are nothing but convenient excuses for what is already known to be true. Now, we’re all entitled to pretend and play with whatever deity we wish, but sit well with the truths of the Father and his rampant misdeeds, and you will see that you are worshipping pure evil.   

The death of self, mind, concept, and ultimately, body, is the opportunity to metamorphose into something completely new. The caterpillar dies in its cocoon, the true phoenix, giving birth to a new being in the form of a butterfly. In this way, the death of religion, and the death of God, is something to be pondered in the formation of a new mode of consciousness. As violence rages, the mass-ordained, led by the bought media, grows confused with the battling of old concepts and narratives meant to perpetuate the drama. We can no longer afford to argue within the “right to believe”—it is time to abandon what no longer serves us, shed the skin, stop making excuses for the ego’s selfish whims to align itself with whatever deity it was raised under, whatever has made you most comfortable over the years, whatever has congealed itself through family, and recognize that since all beliefs are arbitrary, if one belief executes even the slightest harm against another, then that belief must be banished completely, lest you face utter extinction by the forces of Nature herself. The butterfly does not spring out of nowhere—it requires the literal death of its old self to exist. New moons, and solar eclipses, are often presented with the context of “new beginnings,” but the old must be harvested for the new seed to be planted. Death is necessary for birth. The world at large is utterly ignorant of this philosophy, living in complete fear of half of the equation. 

Imperatively, meditate on what must die during this eclipse. I’ve largely answered that question for myself, as made evident by this post. Then, ask yourself, in purest Aquarian fashion, what would a completely new mode of existence look like? What is the purest expression of life? What is your highest desire? Throw out all attempts at finding God, enlightenment, Nirvana, or whatever unattainable state has been teased on the horizon, and ask, what  your ideal current state, now, in complete attunement with the natural world? What if you looked below, and not up? What if the Earth, and its natural state, is all that’s needed? What if the butterfly makes perfect sense?

Santa! Years ago on my old altar.

What is this Death Process that I'm referring to? Simple. No, not so. Before dying, I have learned that people get a short review of their lives. Not every thing is seen, just important moments. Poignant highs and lows and then the most powerful memories in the last of their years are made present. Not everyone can be included. Family, spouses and friends matter most.

It may look like your dying family member or friend is looking for something or wants to say something to you. Often, its no secret. It is that they love you and they are not afraid at all. My dad's eyes searched me. He looked scared. I told him that I'm okay. Tom and I are good. And not to worry, just relax. Everything lifted from him. I held his hand and squeezed in reassurance.

But, this part is easier than the actual death process for the person. My mom slipped into a coma. Unfortunately, my dad did not. He died in a rather terrible expression. The nurses could have fixed him easily, but did not. His death process was fine - just not his appearance. He is actually quite happy! No more chronic pain!

The death process is different for everyone. Ppl with sudden, self-inflicted, violent, or too soon deaths don't have it easy. They can't settle. The spirit stirs. Hauntings happen. But I'm not one who deals with hauntings of this type. I break souls and get rid of demons (lesser demons). I also break chains, open roads, and liberate ppl from destructive behavior if it relates to the spiritual realm. But I am no expert.

Pretty abuela! Te quiro! 💖💖💖

Launch into my death stories! M.M. yes, indeed! 💖💀💖 (Memento Mori, "Remember Death" or "Remember you will die!")

I was a rock for my brother at the early moments when our dad passed. He looked so sad. Defeated and lost. I remained stoic and tearful but acting like our mom would. Aware of the situation but cool and collected. Still that Gibraltar to him. He was sobby and broken and strangely, I was peaceful. I felt dad and his love. I knew he'd be happy. Jerry didn't. I think he was jealous of me being so close to dad, but I lived 2 hours away.

Jerry lived 5 blocks away from dad!i understand that dad's last few years were bad. He was shuffled from his home (which had a lien on it), to hospital, then a home. No wonder my dad was stressed. I feel bad about not seeing my dad when he was more well. He was always determined to stay mobile. Once he was down, he didn't get back up. I just remember seeing my dad after I lost a lot of weight. His face of disbelief! Lol! Half of me was gone!

Sorry. I'm sentimental. Sometimes I wonder if I could help others deal with death in their life with my unique outlook, real life experience with death and death entities, and maybe even a simple ritual or two. Since I'm not religious but spiritual, it opens things up. I'm not fixed and will cross-deity. Which means that I will work spiritually with the being you worship or prefer.

Rattling brains...

When I left Zoe’s about an hour ago, her breathing was a breath, then a long pause. At 4:30pm, the nurse I called, Sara, said that from the sound of Zoe’s breathing, like snoring, her organs were shutting down. She is in a coma “She can still hear you” Nurse Sara said. I think the nurse said Zoe would die soon.