#dear diamond

Fandom: Queen, RPF, 

Pairing: Brian May/Reader, Roger Taylor/Reader

Characters: Reader, Y/N, Brian May, John Deacon, Freddie Mercury, Roger Taylor

Word Count: 893 // Rating: Teen & Up

Summary: Dear Diamond, with your band of gold, some secrets you have, some secrets you hold.

Tags/ Warnings: Engagement, Established Relationship, Love, Cheating, Adultery, Queen Band, Best Friends, Band Mates, Secrets, Hidden Romance, Hidden Love,  Decisions, Turmoil, Angst

Notes: Updated 9/22

The wind rattled through the narrow alley making Y/N shiver. She turned to shield herself from the wind and to keep her cigarette lit. There was chatter coming through the open door of the kitchen, where she had snuck through to get out into the fresh air. The light spilt out to the alley even more as the door which she had pushed ajar opened further. It was then blocked by a shadow of a man who came into view seconds later. 

He stumbled next to her and came to rest against the wall, before lighting up a cigarette. He took a long drag and closed his eyes resting his head back before blowing the smoke out. He smelled of booze. Y/N watched him her heart thumping. 

‘So you’re gonna do it huh?’ he asked, his eyes still closed. Her heart skipped a beat as he spoke and a lump rose in her throat. Her eyes dropped from his form as he opened his and turned to look at her.  ‘Rog…’ ‘What?’ he scowled, ‘it’s just a question.’ ‘A loaded one,’ she said taking a drag on her cigarette. As she lifted her hand she was acutely aware of how heavy the new ring on her left hand was.  ‘You didn’t answer,’ he said.  ‘Because I don’t know what to say,’ she mumbled. 

‘Do you love him?’ he asked, turning to face her head-on. She looked up at him. His face wasn’t angry, it was hopeful.  ‘You know I do,’ she sighed.  ‘Do you love me?’ he said it but it was barely more than a whisper.  ‘I don’t want to,’ she said truthfully, ‘I never wanted to do what I’ve done…’ ‘I don’t regret it,’ he said raising his hand and capturing her chin with his finger. ‘Rog,’ she sighed pulling away.  ‘What?’ he sighed, ‘I can’t even touch you know?’  ‘It’s not that simple anymore,’ she said.  ‘It’s never been that simple, Y/N. You’ve always been my best mates girlfriend. It’s always been a bad thing but I can’t help myself. And you couldn’t either, or don’t you remember last Friday, when Brian was out at Fred’s?’  ‘Of course, I do!’ she hissed, ‘but that doesn’t mean I don’t regret it! I don’t want to be like this! You think if I knew ending it with either of you wouldn’t break my heart that I’d have such a hard time deciding?!’ 

Y/N felt tears welling in her eyes and threaten to spill over. Rog grabbed her and pulled her towards him. She rested in his chest for a minute before pulling back and wiping her eyes. He didn’t know what to say. They were in a mess, and though he felt awful, he loved her too much to stop himself. There was movement at the door which caused them to move apart quickly, each resting against the wall as if they had just been chatting whilst smoking. John came out of the kitchen door and greeted them both before sparking up a cigarette. Y/N made her excuses and then moved out of the alley and back inside to rejoin the gang. This meal had been impromptu, not something she had planned or wanted but Freddie had convinced Brian that low key simply wouldn’t do for his engagement. They had to celebrate. That was how they told all their friends. Out there, in the open, with dozens of other restaurant-goers looking on. Roger had done some stellar acting she had to admit. 

‘There you are,’ Brian said greeting her as she rejoined the table and sat down, ‘I was wondering where you had gotten to.’ ‘He was going to send out a search party,’ Freddie joked, ‘though I think he was thinking more about the cost of that ring than you.’  ‘Fred,’ Brian laughed, ‘if I were worried about the cost of the ring I wouldn’t suggest getting married at all. I expect that Y/N will bend to your every suggestion. And you’re not cheap.’ ‘Anything but darling,’ Freddie winked. Y/N forced a smile but it wasn’t genuine. The weight of the ring seemed to enhance as they talked, weighing her down. It was gorgeous, no doubt cost a bomb and if she knew Brian he had probably scrutinised every ring in the shop to get the best one for her. She felt sick. 

‘You okay?’ he asked leaning in to whisper in her ear. Ever the gentleman he was always checking on her, making sure she was okay, happy.  ‘Yeah fine,’ she lied, ‘just tired.’  ‘I hope not too much,’ Brian chuckled, ‘I’ve got plans for later.’ He winked and then turned to continue his conversation with Freddie who was now rambling on about new song ideas. Roger and John rejoined the table and joined in the conversation though Y/N could tell he was putting on a show.