#dear dad

Ten years ago today, my father died suddenly of a heart attack.

The time we spent together was too short for me to realize how precious it was. Old man, I miss you.

The last time my parents locked me out of the family computer, I worked all summer to buy my first computer. Absolutely the crown jewel of my rebellion against them.

They'll tell you my defiance of their rules -- creating an email account without parental restrictions by lying about my age -- was unacceptable.

They will conveniently leave out that I was actively job hunting and email was the hot new way of communicating and it was humiliating for me to ask potential employers "what's your email, I need to give it to my mom so she can whitelist you" and there was a complete failure of negotiation with my parents to lift the whitelist restriction.

So I made an alt account that bypassed EVERY control my parents had, because they couldn't be reasonable in giving me the freedom of communication necessary for my own growth into independence.

And they were so offended in my defiance that they locked me out.

And I used that job money to buy my own computer.

Prohibition fails. Alcohol. Drugs. Sex work. Abortion. Gay marriage. Guns. Gambling. Energy. Video games. Every attempt to restrict a product or behavior, a good or service, just drives it underground. People desperate enough will seek it out, and when prohibition prevents aboveboard arbitration of disputes, they inevitably become victims of bad actors who were already determined to exist outside the confines of the law.

I for one could not be more proud of the kids for sticking it to the technocrat class and enjoying the freedom of communication that is their right.

If you're concerned about what your children do with freedom, you tell on yourselves for the failure of a parent you are that you did not sufficiently cultivate a conscience of quality in your child, and you've insufficiently prepared them for both the good and the bad this world has to offer. Yes, teaching people responsible indulgence is hard. No amount of prohibition policies will make that up. No amount of outsourcing to either governments or corporations will absolve you of the sacred obligation that is growing a new soul.