#deaged steve

A recent mission ends with Steve being de-aged. Bucky is not amused.

AN: FINALLY I’ve updated my slice of life Avengers fic, so here I go with Chapter 9! Enjoy!

(AO3 Link)

    “Dammit Steve! Get back here!”

    “Language, Barnes. Don’t think Cap’s gonna like it if he finds out about all the obscene words you’re using.”

    “Shove it, Barton,” he snapped back at the archer. Or rather, in the general direction of his voice. Bucky hated this crap that Barton pulled, hiding in the goddamn air vents of all places just to get on his nerves. “Not like he’s gonna remember a thing anyway.”

    “But there are people here who are gonna remember, aren’t there?”

    “I swear to god, Stark -”

    “Bucky!” Oh shit. Whatever the hell had turned Captain America into a toddler on a recent mission, Bucky still didn’t know, too busy chasing around a four year old Avenger to ever ask the details of the rest of the team. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know anyway. Whoever or whatever had the power to revert Steve into his 1920’s era self without removing the Super Soldier Serum, letting him run around the entire sixtieth floor of the Tower (now on effective lock-down to ensure Steve couldn’t escape; Bucky had threatened Stark for that one) attempting to fling himself around the furniture, well…

    Bucky didn’t want to mess with them. It. Whatever.

    “Whee!”

    “No!”

    One good thing the Red Room gave him: reflexes like no one’s business. Good to catch flying toddlers with.

    One thing the Red Room didn’t give him? The ability to really deal with a Super Soldier, short of lethal force. Bucky really wished this whatever-it-was had removed the Serum for the time being. Skinny little twig Steve had been a bit easier to deal with, if a bit too self-righteous for Bucky’s taste, even at a young age. Though he’d been enough of a handful even back then.

    Long story short, the little punk escaped again, was off and running as if Bucky hadn’t just saved his tiny ass from smashing into Stark’s marble floors.

    “Pretty sure little Cap would’ve been perfectly fine if you didn’t catch him. Been complaining about the Serum enough anyway, Barnes,” Barton supplied, as helpful as ever and still hiding in his perch.

    “Guess you weren’t here when that happened and he wouldn’t quit crying. Air vent not fast enough to get you here?” Bucky said, falling to the couch. Coast was clear enough for now. Although Barton and Stark were close enough to children Bucky wasn’t sure it even mattered.

    “Geez, when did you become such a mom, Barnes?” Stark looked too damn smug for Bucky’s taste. The man was lucky chasing a tiny Super Soldier had just about worn him out. Not that he’d forget; he had plenty of ways to terrify Stark in ways that didn’t involve physical harm.

    “Same second you wouldn’t tell me why he’s like this in the first place. And refused to help fix him.” That was the best he could do in the moment.

    “That before you threatened me with bodily harm? Or after you started chasing him around?”

    “Bucky!”

    Goddammit.

    “James?”

    Oh thank god. Natalia always did have the best timing.

    Just the use of his first name and he could hear Barton scampering off through the air vent - smart. The guy had been clear he had no problem with them dating, as long as he didn’t have to see or hear what they got up to on their own. Bucky could respect that. He sure as hell wouldn’t wanna know the intimate details of Barton’s relationships. And so any prank involving their relations had been banned from any future prank wars.

    Fortunately, he didn’t give a damn about rules when it came to Stark. Neither did Natalia. This wasn’t a prank war anyway, so it wasn’t like the rules even mattered.

    She was behind him in a second, arms draped around his shoulders, lips close to his ear, voice low. “Steve giving you trouble?”

    Stark looked conflicted between standing his ground and bolting. Bucky couldn’t help but feel vindicated. “Something like that. Could really use some cheering up, doll.” Hell, Steve was right there just watching; parenting books probably hated him. Lucky he wasn’t a parent. Stark’s face was completely worth it.

    “Oh come on! Thought we banned this sorta thing!”

    “Who said this was a prank?”

    “Keep up, Stark. Thought you were supposed to be a genius or something.”

    “But if you’re so bothered by us, I’m sure Bruce would love some help in the lab.” Oh, Natalia was cunning, and he loved her for it. Bruce had decided to search for the cure for their...little problem. The fact he hadn’t pulled through yet meant he’d hit a wall. Bucky was proud of her.

    With a huff, Stark willingly took the bait, stalking toward the door, and Natalia dropped down on the couch at his side. She shot him a playful sort of glare. “Doll?”

    “What?” He grinned. “Had all the girls falling for my charm.”

    “In the 40’s.”

    He shrugged. “Gonna blame a guy for trying?”

    She just shook her head. “Idiot.”

    “That a yes or no? I allowed to use it?”

    There was just enough time for her to roll her eyes before - “Auntie Nat!” (Little Steve had taken to her in particular - none of them knew exactly why.) then she was off extracting Steve from whatever he’d managed to climb on - Bucky didn’t even know what this time, too concerned with Stark when the kid had called out earlier. Then the question came to mind.

    “Does this count as our first date?”

    She gave him a sideways grin as she punched him in the shoulder, a surprisingly docile Steve balanced on her hip with the other arm. “Babysitting your four year old best friend as a date?”

    He cocked his head to the side with a teasing affirmation. To be fair, nothing had gone off the rails yet - better than their track record with actual dating.

    “Getting sloppy, James. I’m disappointed.”

    “I prefer ‘lazy in my old age’.”

The elevator lets out an obnoxious ‘ding’ as it arrives, the sound loud enough to draw the attention of everyone in the room. The doors slide open to Darcy’s grinning face, “Okay, so it’s ass o’clock in the morning and there’s more blood than caffeine in my system. What’s the emergenc- whoa!” Darcy cuts herself off mid tirade and blinks as Natasha bears down on her. The usually immaculate assassin is now anything but; her hair in a riotous mass of curls around a pale face bare of makeup. There’s what looks suspiciously like a jam kiss riding high on her left cheekbone, and a matching chocolate one on the opposite cheek. Natasha’s clothes aren’t faring much better, covered in glitter and scraps of felt. “Okay, why does it look like a day care centre threw up on you?” Darcy wonders aloud, in the tone of someone who very much does not want the answer to that question. Natasha’s eye twitches worryingly, and Darcy spends a moment silently reciting her will, and then gets distracted by the thought of Thor carrying her coffin, alone and shirtless. The image is both morbid and hot, very hot. Muscles. 

When Darcy returns to reality, Natasha is still staring at her, patiently, like she knows Darcy just briefly left the planet. “Children.” She enunciates carefully, when she realises Darcy is paying attention. Darcy blinks, and slides her gaze over the other woman’s shoulder to the disaster zone beyond. Bruce is sprawled across the couch, covered in glitter and snoring. Clint is dozing on the back of the couch, his hair spiked with an alarming green substance Darcy doesn’t dare identify. Even Thor looks exhausted, slumped on the floor and hugging Mjolnir like a particularly hard, hammer shaped safety blanket. Actually, now that she’s looking, the ends of his hair look a little singed. “Children did this?” Darcy finally gets out, and is treated to a repeat of Natasha’s eye twitch. “It looks like you were attacked by a horde of angry scrap bookers!” Darcy’s voice climbs in volume, and Natasha’s eyes go wide. She gets halfway through shushing the other woman when a soft ‘thump’ comes from another room, and Natasha goes still. “Oh, no.” She whispers, as Clint snorts awake on the couch and Darcy looks on in bemusement.“The young sirs are awake.” JARVIS says, in the same tones one might say ‘the bomb is about to go off’, or ‘the zombies are at the door and you just used your last bullet’. Darcy belatedly wonders if she should have brought her taser, at least for comfort since she can’t see herself tasering small children, no matter how demonic. And then the sources of terror enter the room, and Darcy forgets about the state of the other Avengers entirely.Bucky enters first, and is easily recognised for his tiny metal arm. He’s wearing Iron Man pajama pants and a Hulk shirt, looking tousled and sleepy-eyed as he wanders in. Steve is behind him, tiny and fey looking with his white blonde hair and impossibly blue eyes. He’s clutching a teddy in one hand and Bucky’s flesh hand with the other. Tony is the last, and his appearance takes the longest for Darcy to compute.

Oh NO... Steve and Tony are playing Knights at the playground and are ""defending"" the top tower from the Evil Dragon Clint (who is more of just perched on the monkey bars and cawing at yhem). Steve decides that in order to protect Tony, he has to take out Clint and ""sacrifice"" himself to the ""lava"" (the ground) so Tony can then escape. He scrambles up to the top of the monkey bars and crouches; Tony barely has time to call for him and Clint only gets up one hand before Steve launches and tackles Clint, sending them both over to fall the four feet or so to the ground.

Steve IMMEDIATELY gets scolded by the adults for behaving recklessly, and then they all hear Tony crying his little eyes out because he thinks Steve is gone and Steve feels so awful... he runs over and ignores his bleeding scrapes and pulls Tony into a big hug to quietly apologize for scaring him and kiss his forehead, then promises him he "ain't ever gonna leave 'im" and demands the adults take them home right away so they can snuggle together with their stuffed animals.

Absolutely. He gets up in anyone's face who dares to get too close and snaps if they try to talk to Tony. Tony thinks its so sweet and lets out the tiniest giggles whenever Steve does it, and Steve immediately whirls on him to give him the biggest smile... they clearly love each other a lot, and they are almost always holding hands (Tony's hand is still smaller tucked into Steve's despite them both being children).

At first they hate each other--well, really, Steve hates Tony because he's so shy and quiet and good so he gets held a lot and read to and extra snacks. On the other hand, Steve is a firey whirlwind of trying to fight literally everyone or climbing onto things he shouldn't to get to something he shouldn't get at. Bucky volunteers as babysitter tribute since Steve faintly recognizes him, or maybe recognizes him as safe. Tony always inches away whenever Steve throws a hissy fit on the floor, hiding behind someone's legs or the couch until things are quiet again.

Eventually, Steve tries to go after Tony for being a big baby, but Bucky plucks him up and tells him he's not allowed to bully the other squirt. Steve, ofc, is absolutely offended that Bucky thinks he's a bully, and manages to land one little shoe squarely into Bucky's junk, which ends up with Steve hogtied to a chair in the corner and Clint having to take over. Steve tries to tell Clint it's wrong to tie up kids and Clint just shrugs, "You wouldn't sit if we didn't."

Yup. He's in and out of the medbay CONSTANTLY, and each time Tony scolds him about not taking care of himself first. Steve just pouts behind his oxygen mask and sticks his tongue out when Tony looks away because he's a big boy, he can keep up with the adults, he doesn't need his inhaler or heart medication!

Oh absolutely. Tony has to crouch down and hold him by his tiny hips so he can't squirm away and Tony makes sure he takes his inhaler properly and gets his breath back before letting him go again. Steve hates it so much, he just wants to run around and have fun and Mr. Tony has to go and ruin it all by making sure he can breathe LOL

Oh my god Tony looks like a tiny Howard Stark in his smoking jacket and loafers and he VERY much doesn’t want to get dirty but Steve convinces him to go outside in the rain, nobody will know, his clothes will dry..

Of course Steve pushes them into the mud and they wrestle around until they are covered in filth and grime and by the time Natasha finds where they’d gotten off to, she makes them strip down to their undies outside so their dirty clothes don’t get in the house and they have to walk all the way to the bathroom like that to get cleaned up.

Tony is so so upset by the whole ordeal and keeps trying to apologize, but Natasha just says she understands, little boys play in the mud, it’s okay, but Tony gets more and more upset by the thought of him doing something wrong and upsetting her...... Steve sees this and holds Tony’s hands and leans in to kiss his dirty cheek, smiling when Tony immediately melts and gets a dopey look on his face.