#davidadkins

The last thing he had wanted to do that day was go to a meeting for alcoholics, but that’s exactly where David had ended up being. While he had wanted to blame his parents or best friend or the night guard who had taken away his innocence for his addiction, he knew that it wasn’t their fault, not completely. They hadn’t forced him to start drinking, but at the time, he thought it was his only way to escape the crappy reality. It helped him a lot at first, but now, it only made him angry and lonely, which wasn’t the best combination. He’s known for years that he needed to stop, and while he had cut back a lot on his own, he would occasionally slip up. He wasn’t as bad as he used to be, but he knew he would never be one hundred percent fixed if he didn’t go to at least one stupid meeting. And he needed to at least try to control his limit, if not for him, then for the girl he was seeing and her son. David released a sigh as he walked into the room where the other addicts were, some already seated, and others in a conversation. The room was small and white, the only colors were the colored papers pinned on the bulletin board on one of the walls. They were forcing people to be stuck here for an hour to talk about their stories, and they couldn’t have at least make the place a little bit more cheerful? It was like hell. As much as the brunette male wanted to turn around, walk back through the door like he had never been there in the first place, and go back home to play video games or something for the rest of the night, the voice in the back of his head reminded him why he was there in the first place. For Rora and Rixon, he thought to himself. At that same exact moment, a woman, who he assumed was their counselor, spoke up, telling everyone to take their seats. He took one last look over his shoulder at the door, almost cursing himself for coming here in the first place, before he forced his feet to drag him to the closest empty seat. Leaning against the chair, he crossed his arms as his eyes roamed to the faces all around him. Some of the people in the room surprised him; if he had walked past them in the street or if they were a random client at the law firm, he didn’t think he’d ever guess they needed help. Others, though, seemed to fit in. David, while he didn’t look like he belonged there right now, there were times when he got into his binging moods and constantly looked hungover. All David had to do was sit through an hour of this, and then he’d be free to leave, maybe after grabbing a few snacks to take home. His eyes moved to the table where a bunch of snacks and refreshments were laid out, and on cue, his stomach growled quietly. When the female began to talk again, his eyes shifted back ahead of him, watching as one guy had raised his hand to volunteer to start this off. Who even does that? David blocked out most of his story, his mind wandering off to other places. David’s attentioned was brought back shortly attention, hearing the word ‘molested’. He stared at the girl, admiring the way that she just admitted that to everyone. Having been molested also when he was a teenager, he never spoke a word of it to anyone, not even his twin sister who knew the most about him. Though he didn’t tell anyone, he never forgot about those sleepless nights, having nightmares about it ever since. There were still some nights where he couldn’t bring himself to turn his bedroom light off. The dark haired woman sat down, and few a few moments, it was completely silent in the room, as everyone waited to see who would be brave enough to volunteer or if they’d have to be picked randomly. Before he could process what was happening, David stood up, all eyes on him. “Hi, uh, I’m David. I got involved with the wrong crowd when I was younger, and things happened while I was involved with them, so now I’m really messed up and alcohol is the only thing that’s been there for me after all these years.” Shrugging his shoulders, he sat back down. He hadn’t wanted to tell his entire life story like the two people before him had done - he didn’t need all these people to know he had partaken in an activity that killed a guy, or that he had been sent away to a boys group home when he was younger and he lost his innocence during his days there. They didn’t need to know about how he still has nightmares about those nights vividly, like he was there all over again. He shook his head, listening as to the next person went. When everyone had shared and they were dismissed, David got up, and, instead of going to the snack table like his original plan was, he found himself quickly heading in the direction of that molested girl. Tapping on her shoulder, he cleared his throat when she turned around to face him. “Clarissa, right?” He asked, remembering that was what she introduced herself as. “David. I just wanted to say that I admire how you told everyone about what happened to you. Not everyone would’ve done that.”

Clarissa timidly raised her hand. She had told her story numerous times, but it never got easier. “Go ahead” the female said. Clarissa stood up “so I’m Clarissa but most people call me Clary. I’ll keep this short and sweet” she started “hi Clarissa” others mumbled. “I’m a Dallas girl now living in Cali. I’ve struggled with alcohol dependency since I was 15 due to being molested and abused by my babysitter” she said before sitting down. She didn’t want to go into too much detail, which was for her private counselling sessions. She didn’t need to divulge everything to these people, nor did she want to.

- - - - past; 18 years old. - - - - All David could think about as he loaded his jeep up with boxes was how much he couldn’t wait to be out of that neighborhood. He couldn’t wait to get away from his “parents” who had made his home life unbearable, away from his so called “friends” who had come and gone whenever they pleased, and away from all of the bad memories that had built up through the years. Everywhere he looked held a memory, and while that specific memory might’ve been good, it always led to a bad memory. As he looked up at the house he had spent the last eleven years living in reminded him of the very first day he and his twin sister had been taken in by the Adkins family. He could remember how he felt, mixed and confused with  his emotions. They were kind and sincere (ha, that wouldn’t last long) people, but they weren’t his mom, and the seven year old had only wanted her. Of course that had been its own set of problems. The two people who appeared in most of his memories were Bryce and Rhys, both of whom he wasn’t on good terms with. It wasn’t like he wanted to be a bad terms with either of them, but his stubborn nature kept him from fixing things. While he couldn’t blame anyone but himself for the way his twin sister was pushing him away, he blamed Rhys for what happened between them, for what happened to him. He had just abandoned David, leaving him nothing but a pathetic text message explaining it, then had the nerve to come back recently, acting like nothing happened. Three years had gone by without so much as a word, but a lot had happened in those years. David hadn’t been the same hyperactive, hiding-everything-behind-a-witty-comment boy he was the last time his best friend saw him; no, he was angry, dark, shut off from the world all the time. If he didn’t like the person he had become, why would his best friend accept it? These were the thoughts that continued to plague the eighteen year old’s mind as he drove down the main road, away from the mayor’s house. He couldn’t shake Rhys from his thoughts, and it wasn’t until he was almost out of the city that he realized why. He hated even said goodbye to him. David might’ve been mad at the younger male, but they still had a lot of history together, having been David’s very first friend and sticking by his side while David adjusted to his new home and town. It was an instant connection back when they met, and no matter what had happened, he was like a brother to him. Without a second thought, David turned his jeep around, heading toward Rhy’s house. In a little over ten minutes, David parked his jeep in the clearing of the woods. He stopped in his tracks once he got out of his vehicle, looking up at the house that had been abandoned long ago. It had become David’s and Rhys’s hide out spot when they were younger, and while he had spent the three years visiting occasionally, he hadn’t been here since before Rhys had come back to Los Angeles. Forcing himself to keep walking towards the house where he knew the dark haired man teenager was, he turned the door handle, the door creaking as it opened. “I know you’re here, Rhys. You weren’t home, so I came here t-” he stopped mid sentence as he took in the scene before him; his best friend held a rope in his hands, his eyes red and a visible tear was streaking down his face. “Wha… what’s going on?” David asked, though he had a feeling he already knew the answer to that. - - - - present; 25 years old. - - - - David had never expected that he’d ever be a lawyer. When he was younger, he dreamed of being a professional baseball player or a drummer in a band, but everything had changed while he was a teenager. Still, though, it wasn’t until his first year of college that he decided that he wanted to be a lawyer, to help out those who needed justice, to help send the bad guys away. Never, in a million years, did he think he would enjoy his work or be one of the best lawyers at his law firm. It was only his first year there, and already, David Adkins was making a name for himself. He supposed he had his stubborn attitude to thank for that, for his ability to never give up on his client, and going to hell and back just to win. It wasn’t just about winning for him though, it was about doing the right thing, which he took pride in. As much as he loved work, though, he enjoyed when it turned 6 o’clock and could go back home, or, in this case, crash at his twin sisters for the night. That was one of the downfalls to having a roommate - whenever Cass was over, David either had to leave for the night or suck it up and deal with hearing it in his bedroom. He normally went with the first option, and took turns sleeping over at Aurora’s and Bryce’s house. But with Aurora taking care of a sick baby, David and his sister decided to have a bonding night. Unknown to him, it’d be cut short. He’d only been there for five minutes when he heard his phone beep, letting him know he had a text message. Seeing it was from Rhys, he opened it immediately, reading the words, need your help. come home. His eyebrows came together in confusion, before he looked up at Bryce. “I have to go for a bit. I’ll probably be back later, but I’ll call you?” He told her, feeling bad for leaving her, but Rhys needed his help right now, for whatever reason. He got into his jeep, and it was moments like these he was glad that Bryce and him happened to live in the same neighborhood. It only took him two minutes before he pulled into their driveway, running up their porch and into the house. He spotted Rhys in the living room, and after taking a second to catch his breathe, he raised his eyebrows. “I got your text. What’s up?”

Being alone wasn’t something that David minded much. Ever since he was younger, he had always felt like an outcast. It started when he was younger, after being adopted into a new family. What five year old wouldn't feel alone after being taken from their mom and placed in a house full of strangers? At least he had Bryce with him then, but the older they grew and the more sh*t they got into, the further they drifted from each other. By fifteen, David had been completely alone. Being sent to a group home for troubled boys and isolated away from the only person who had been by his side, David was depressed. Long after he came back home, he kept himself at a distance from his family and friends, including Bryce. Much like David, their relationship was broken. Loneliness became a constant feeling for the teenager, and it wasn’t long before he was accustomed to the feeling. It wasn’t until this night that David realized how truly lonely he was. He had his twin sister, he had friends and co-workers, and he had ex flings, but the feeling never left him, no matter who walked in and out of his life.  The twenty-five year old had never let anyone in completely; he was the type of person who didn’t like to feel or care, so he’d usually push the person away before they got too close. The only two people that remained in his life after all these years had been Bryce and Rhys Campbell, both of whom were his best friends. But not even they could wash away the feeling that something was missing, and it wouldn’t be until a beach party at Venice Beach that he would realize what it was. Although David had wanted to spend his night at home, with a beer, and catching up on sleep, he had let his roommate talk him into going to the party. Not even a half an hour there, though, and Rhys had ditched him after spotting his girlfriend, leaving the brunette male at the table where all the alcohol seemed to be. Ignoring the voice in the back of his head that was telling him not to drink, he poured himself a drink, filling the red solo cup to the rim. “Just one,” David muttered to himself, before chugging down the liquid contents in the cup, feeling the immediate affect on him. Many drinks and broken promises to himself that “this is my last one” later, David found himself stumbling over his own feet as he walked around the beach. His emotions were taking over, something whiskey always had a way of doing, and he needed to see Rhys. He was going to tell that asshole off for ditching him, not caring who it was for, he knew better than to trust David around alcohol. Stumbling around the party, he turned a girl around who looked like Rhys’s girlfriend, already raising his voice at the young woman. To his surprise, it wasn’t Cassie, but a complete stranger, who used all her forced to shove him backwards. He felt his body crash into a petite frame before feeling gravity take control, forcing his body onto the sandy beach, his head crashing into the sand. After making a complete ass out of himself, and feeling all the eyes on him, he opened his eyes,  locking them on the girl he obviously bumped into. She was blonde, and despite his blurry vision, one of the most beautiful women he’s ever seen. For the first time in what felt like forever, David Adkins was speechless. He felt his mouth dry up, out of nerves, and he felt queasy, either because he had a concussion from hitting his head, or it was what everyone described as butterflies. Even though he had his past flings, no one made him feel like this. Realizing he probably looked like he suffered brain damage from the blow to his head, he swallowed hard before his voice rasped. “I-I’m so sorry about that, I’m a little-” His words were slurring, and it didn’t help that he had to hiccup in the middle of the sentence. Smooth move, David, he scolded to himself, you’re drunk as f*** and can’t even speak to her. Real nice. “Drunk.” he finished, a sheepish smile spreading across his face, trying to sit up from the sand.

“What th- sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t,” David mumbled under his breath as he stared intently at the television. Displayed on the screen was his favorite video game, because yes, these days, David Adkins would rather stay at home playing video games than go out and get trashed. Not that he didn’t enjoy drinking occasionally, but he had a problem when it came to the alcoholic substance and he was trying to get better, which meant avoiding people who would spend their nights at the bar every weekend. So this was how he spends most of his nights after work, though usually he’d be with his roommate and best friend, but he was gone with his girlfriend for the night. “Ha, got you bitch!” He exclaimed, as he finally killed the main target that had taken him four tries already. He set the controller down to grab a slice of pizza as the words, but mid-bite, he heard a knock on his door. David’s eyebrows came together in confusion; Bryce had already went to bed, since she had to wake up early for a photoshoot, and the only other person who would come over was currently at home with her son. A soft sigh fell from his lips as the knocking continued, forcing David to get up from the couch. “I’m coming,” he said loudly, unsure if whoever was on the other side had even heard him. In no time, the male was at the door, surprised to find Emberlynn standing there. “Em?” He asked, confusion laced in his voice. Before he could ask what the girl was doing there, he noticed how upset she seemed to be, the tears noticeable in her eyes. “Are you crying? Come on in.” Grabbing her arm, he pulled her gently inside, shutting the door behind them. “You hungry? I still have some pizza from earlier. Help yourself,” he said, adding a shrug with his shoulders at the last part.

- - - - past; 7 years old. - - - - “And this will be your room,” the woman said, giving David a kind smile as he brushed past her and into his new bedroom. Even though he didn’t show it, he was excited that he finally had his own room for the first time since… well, ever. “Well… goodnight, David. I’ll see you in the morning.” He glanced back around, watching as the woman, who had introduced herself as Miranda, walked away. Miranda and her husband both seemed nice, but David still couldn’t help but to miss his mom.. his real mom. It had been two years since the last time he saw her, but there hadn’t been a day that went by where he didn’t want to go and find her, but he didn’t know where she was. She’d find him though, wouldn’t she? Sleep wasn’t something that came easily to the boy that night. It never did in a new place.  Instead, the seven year old stared up at the ceiling, his mind attempting to come up with all the ways this house and these people sucked. It was something that he and Bryce had done a lot after getting taken from their mom, they’d find the things they hated about wherever they were. In a way, it gave him comfort; he was used to it. But, this time, it failed. He couldn’t think of anything bad about this place. His own room, the biggest house he had ever been in, good cooking, a pool, a dog that belonged to the family named Morley. Even the young couple had been generous to them all day. As much as he loved that, a small part of him hated it. He hated that someone could be generous and loving enough to replace his real mom… the mom who had stopped caring about him and Bryce along the way, no matter how much David tried to fight that fact. Getting out of bed, David quietly left his room, tiptoeing down the hallway where Bryce’s room was. He knocked on the door, but without waiting for an answer, he entered the room. He didn’t need to ask if she was sleeping to know she wasn’t. David wasn’t sure it was the twin telepathy thing they had or not, but he knew it was never wrong. “I can’t think of a single thing I hate…” David whispered, knowing she’d know what he was talking about. - - - - past; 16 years old. - - - - For months, David Adkins had longed to be back home. The home that had never been a home to him, where he was constantly arguing with his dad and being reminded that he was a disappointment and a f*** up. It hadn’t always been that way. When Bryce and him had first been adopted by the Adkins, they had been loving and warming, encouraging, understanding, patient. That was the home that David had longed for the last eight months. But things hadn’t been that way in years, and David was stupid to think that maybe things would go back that way when he finally came home. Still, though, seeing his sister and his friends were the only thing that kept David going whenever he wanted to give up. Now that he was home once again, he wondered why he wanted to come back. His foster dad had been more of a d*ck to him than usual, greeting him with a “Well, I hope you learned your lesson and do what I say from now on.” His mom, on the other hand, showed concern but quickly dismissed it whenever her husband walked into the room. Bryce, though, acted cold toward him. When he first came home, she barely even looked at him, and whenever he tried to talk to her, she pretended like she was in her own little world. Maybe she was, but David wouldn’t know. He wasn’t part of that world. Not that he could blame him, because if the roles were reversed and Bryce had spent the last seven months denying his visitations, he probably would just as hurt and cold as she is now. But, she didn’t know how hard it was to look at her. To know that, despite their parents being assholes, she had it good. Way better than what he had, night after night. He wouldn’t tell her though. No. He’d just have to learn to accept her newfound attitude toward him. His friends? Well… he didn’t have any anymore. Rhys had almost two years ago, and the crowd he found himself hanging out with afterwards all ended up in jail after the incident that had happened. David was alone, completely and utterly alone. Their parents left not too long ago for some meeting that David didn’t care much to ask about, leaving him and his twin sister alone. He hated that they weren’t on speaking terms right now. Silence wasn’t something he liked very much, especially when it came from his other half. Forcing himself to shut his laptop closed, he pushed himself away from his computer desk and made his way to the same room that she had slept in for the nine years since they got adopted by the Adkins. He knocked on the door, and it wasn’t surprising that he was met with a deadly silence. The teen knocked a couple more times, and he was just about to give up when he decided that he wasn’t going to. He was going to get her to talk to him, about anything. He didn’t even care if the topic was the weather or about math homework. He walked right into her room, and for the first time since he came back home, he saw that there was actually something different about her. She looked almost the same as she did the last time he saw her before being sent away, but there was something off about her, he just couldn’t place his finger on it. “Bryoda… what’s going on with you? You’re different,” he stated matter-of-factly, though he knew she’d reply with something along the lines of “yeah, so didn’t you.” Because he had changed. He wasn’t the same David he had been eight months ago, and as much as he tried to act like he didn’t need anyone in his life, the truth was, he needed Bryce. He just needed to talk to her, to know that she’s okay and she needed to know that he was okay, even if he wasn’t actually okay. - - - - present; 25 years old. - - - - It was a big day for the twenty-five year old, who had just won his very first case since being employed at Miller & Harrison Law Firm. David beamed as he walked through the law firm, people congratulating him on the win. Being a lawyer wasn’t something that he had planned on doing when he was younger. Sure, he had heard that he would make a fine lawyer some day, with his stubborn attitude, argumentative side, and his ability to never give up, but it hadn’t been until he was seventeen that he realized that’s what he needed to be. Almost like it was what he was supposed to do in life. He never knew it would feel this great though to win a case. He wanted to celebrate it. While he had wanted to spend the night with the three people who meant the most to him in the world, Bryce, Rhys, and Aurora, two of those options were busy that night. Rhys was on a date with his girlfriend, and David knew he wouldn’t home until the morning, and the girl he was sort of seeing was at home with her son. Which left David and Bryce alone, not that he minded. He actually looked forward to spending time alone with his sister, since it had been a while since they did that. Even Tuesdays, they seemed to be busy during the early hours of the day, and they were only left a few hours at night to catch up on their television shows. A little over thirty minutes later, David arrived at his sister’s place. Carrying in a large pizza and other side ideas he had ordered from their favorite pizza place, he walked right on in without even knocking. “Bryoda!” He announced, setting the pizza up in the kitchen. “Guess who won the case? Come celebrate with me, I bought pizza, cheese bread, and chicken wings.” He was in the middle of filling his plate up, when he saw the quick flash of disgust cross over her face, causing him to pause. Just as quickly it was there, it was gone. “What? Did you suddenly get allergic to pizza or something?” He half joked, a chuckle falling from his lips, though he had a feeling this was no joking matter.

David’s adopted parents were big on politics, and it wasn’t really surprising when their dad decided to run for mayor. Their once kind and caring dad became obsessed with winning mayor, and their happy little family soon fell apart. He put a lot of pressure on the twins and despite how unhappy the two were, they both kept up the charade. They tried their best to stay out of trouble, but that proved to be impossible as they got older, especially with David. He started to act out, began to become rebellious, just because he craved attention from their dad. After experimenting his sexuality in his teenage years, he realized he was bisexual, and then fifteen year old came out to his family about it. His dad didn’t like his son being “half gay” as he put it, and to fix the problem, he sent David to a therapist. The therapist soon began to molest David, and at first, he kept quiet about it, ashamed of himself. When he finally told his parents, they refused to believe him, accusing him of lying just to piss their father off, which he had a habit of doing. They continued to make David go to the therapist, but he began to skip sessions and would spend the hour getting high with his friends instead.

Past; 15 Years Old. After hitting the send button, David's eyes lingered to the window that belonged to the boy as if they've done this a million times. Not even a few moments later, as if on cue, the window slid open and out popped Tanner's head. A smirk crossed David's face at his words, shrugging his shoulders in reply. "My 'arse' ways," he began, imitating his friend's accent, something he had practiced over the years of knowing him, "make your life exciting." He watched as Tanner jumped from the window on to the patio roof before finally hitting the grass with a soft 'thud'. "I'm surprised you and your fat arse haven't already broken up," he replied jokingly,  a soft chuckle falling from his lips. That was one of his favorite things about the friendship between Tanner and him; they could insult each other and just laugh it off. It wasn't like that with other people - he could still recall telling Kyle at baseball practice to slow down on eating chips when they realized his speed decreased a lot over the summer, earning him a punch in the gut. David's hand moved to the back of his neck, absentmindedly rubbing it, a habit he had picked up whenever he got nervous. Like he was right now, when he noticed Tanner staring a little too long at his cheek, where, undoubtedly, was a bruise from his fathers actions. His breath caught in his throat, but hearing his question, he let out a sigh of relief. That was another one of the reasons he loved that Tanner was his best friend - he would never pry into his business, even when David saw that he wanted to. David, on the other hand, needed to be more like him. He allowed his curiosity get the best of him more often than not, and tended to ask a million questions. He wasn't so much that was nosy, but more like protective over them. How could he protect his friends if he doesn't know what's wrong with them? "Yeah. Bryce is spending the night at Ronnie's tonight," David answered with a nod of his head. "There's a damn party tonight and they'd rather spend the night doing whatever girls do. Can you believe that?" He laughed softly, rolling his eyes as he did so. Turning his back around so he was facing the street again, he began to walk in the direction of Tommy Mullinger's house, glancing over his shoulder quick to make sure he was following him. Pulling out his almost empty pack of cigarettes from his other pocket, he took one of the cancer sticks, lighting it up. Smoking wasn't something he was proud of. In fact, he was almost ashamed of his bad habit. He had only been twelve the first time he smoked a cigarette under the pressure of some of the older neighborhood kids, but he hadn't been able to shake it since. David didn't smoke much, especially not around his group friends knowing all too well that his sister hated it. Only when he was feeling stressed out or after one of his encounter with his drunk dad, like tonight. He took a drag, a cloud of smoke leaving his lips after he exhaled after a few moments. David looked at Tanner, who was walking beside him, silently offering him the cigarette. Small conversation was being made as they continued toward the house, arriving there after a thirteen minute walk. They could hear the music, This Is Why I'm Hot, spilling from the house from down the road, and David knew that it would be a good night. "Bryce and Veronica are missing out, I'm telling you." The front door was cracked open already, so without bothering to knock, he walked inside. People were already drunk, some were grinding over their boyfriends, while other people were playing games like "Never Have I Ever" or truth or dare. It latter seemed interesting, and he made a mental note to join it later if it was still going on. He, however, immediately made his way to were the drinks were, grabbing two red solo cups for him and Tanner, filling them to the rim with the first bottle he saw. He didn't even care what he was drinking, just as long as he would get f***ed up. Present Day; 24 Years Old. "David Adkins? From the Bronx?" He heard suddenly, causing his eyes to widen slowly. Not many people knew where he was originally from, so it took his by surprise. Sure, he wasn't necessarily hiding the fact that he had been born and raised in Bronx, but opening up about his past wasn't something he liked to do. Usually when asked about his past, he'd just give a shrug and say something along the lines of "there's not much to say." He knew that talking about where he was even from would turn to questions about his mom and dad, and he didn't care to discuss about either of those topics. His dad was an alcoholic who abused him to the point where David had killed him because he had enough, and his mom? His mom was the cause of all the horrible things he'd gone through in his life. He pushed the thoughts away, focusing his attention on the male who had asked. He looked so familiar, he just couldn't place his finger on it. Of course, most of his memory from his childhood was blocked away, even the faces of people who he had once cared about. It had just been too difficult to think about the only three people who made him happy in the days following his mom's departure during his time in the institution. He had longed for them, but no matter how much he would would imagine them coming to visit him, they never did. Truth be told, he was conflicted. While he was glad that they never visited him - less people he had to put on a show for and pretend he's okay - so they wouldn't see what was going on with him, he wish he'd at least gotten a letter from them. Of course, he couldn't really blame them, since they hadn't known he killed is dad, he would be sent to an institution to do his time. They were told that they were going to live with their mom in Boston, and that was it. Still, he needed to blame someone other than himself for once, so it was easy to eventually block them out at some point. Hearing the name Tanner Ashby, David's brows came together once more in confusion. "Tann-Tanner, yeah, right!" David exclaimed after a minute when he finally remembered his good friend from his hometown. As a slideshow of memories played in his mind, he was mentally beating himself up. How could he have let himself forget about Tanner? He had been the only male David had actually let himself get close to in his entire life. Sure, for a bit, he was close to Nate Dallas, his former roommate, but it wasn't the same - not after all he had been through. He was closed off, pushed him away. But here Tanner was, the very first boy who he let into his life. The twenty-four year old's face broke out into a smile. "Holy f***. I can't believe this. How the f*** have you been?"