Hidden Talents page 49:

Torchie grabbed the seat on my other side. He'd sort of attached himself to me. That was okay-I didn't mind sticking with someone who knew what was going on. And, compared to a lot of the kids I'd seen, he was reasonably normal, if you didn't count his slight problem with fire. Besides, he was so relentlessly friendly that being mean to him would be like kicking a puppy. He didn't act like those kids who ask, Will you be my friend? Now, those kids I don't mind kicking. With Torchie, it was more like he was saying, I'm going to be your friend. I didn't see any point fighting it.

Hidden Talents page 166:

"Sorry." Trash picked up the pencil and put it back on the desk. "How about you just say sorry once a day?" I suggested. "Say it in the morning, and that'll cover whatever happens during the next twenty-four hours. Okay?" "I'll try." He dropped his gaze to the floor for a moment, but then looked back up. He reminded me of a puppy who'd just been scolded.

The Eye of Argon (Jim Theis) "Described as "the worst fantasy novella ever", The Eye of Argon is a story by then 16 year-old Jim Theis. It's the tale of Grignr, a foul-mouthed barbarian warrior who is trying to escape the dungeons of Evil Overlord Agaphim and rescue a young woman named Carthena from a pagan cult who want to sacrifice her to their idol — a statue with one eye called "The Eye of Argon". (A "scarlet emerald", complete with some interesting plumbing.)

Published in the fanzine OSFAN 7 in 1970, the story is well known for its abundant cliches, shoddy spelling, flat characters, wooden dialogue and overly colourful writing. Every woman is a "wench", eyes are "emerald orbs". Almost nothing is ever "said" — instead it is "queried" or "ejaculated" or "husked" or "stated whimsicoracally". There's an extended scene involving elderly cult priests groping Carthena, and she is described earlier as a "half-naked harlot… with a lithe, opaque nose".

The most widely-known and circulated copy of the story comes to an abrupt and unsatisfactory halt, and for many years it was believed that the ending was lost forever (or even, in some quarters, that the story was never completed). Recent years have seen the separate discoveries of two intact copies of the fanzine in which The Eye of Argon debuted, so it is now known how the tale ends. (With multiple exclamation marks, it turns out.)

At science fiction conventions, The Eye of Argon is now a sort of parlor game. All participants sit in a circle with a hard copy of the story, and the first one starts reading aloud — pronouncing every word as it's misspelled, and including every adjective. When they finally burst into laughter, the copy is passed to the next person. If a person manages to make it through more than a page, the copy is sometimes passed anyway, on the grounds that the reader must have special training as a news anchor."

Weenies series (David Lubar) "A series of horror story collections for kids which range from the funny to the weird to the outright twisted."

i was just wondering if a fandom exists for Hidden Talents by David Lubar or if it only exists in my heart

okay throwback to February when I read a book for the first time in a year and it altered my brain chemistry. please read Hidden Talents and True Talents by David Lubar (or even just the TV tropes page) I need someone else here with me.

top image, left to right, my designs for the main 6 characters: Cheater, Martin, Torchie, Trash, Lucky, Flinch

-book was hidden talents by David Lubar. had the sequel as a kid but read the first one a lot less

-my copy is signed??

-fimished it in one sitting, didn't realize it's after midnight now. oops.

-the plot was simple but very cute, thoroughly enjoyed the kids

-martin compares his friends to puppies no less than 3 times. homosexual behavior

-not a single one of those kids was neurotypical

Oh what was that thing I read about that girl that got the ability to talk to animals and they told her she was dumb and ugly?

Oh what about that one with the kid that was scared of cows and it turned out the cows had a monster living inside them that ripped their way out

The freaking vampire rat with vampire fleas, the little fairy the kid catches in a jar that escapes with a diamond she makes and is gonna come back for revenge, the girl that gets turned into a witches monkey, the one where the dads hand gets cut off and the kid loses it and it comes back and starts messing with him...