Ouh. I am so unsure about my feelings towards Skizz.
In the past I was very uncomfortable with him, and refused to interact with his content or content including him. It was an understandable decision, if you know what happened.
But I saw so many people saying about how it was a misunderstanding, and how he was better now, and stuff like that. So I taught myself to be comfortable with him. It took a while, but I stopped feeling on edge when watching content with him in it, and I accepted him as part of the MCYT community once again.
But now a popular headcanons blog has mentioned it, and I'm starting to doubt the choice I made.
It's been about a year now since it all, and I'm really not sure what to think. Everyone is always saying how he's an angel, how nice of a person he is, but I really don't know. It feels contradictory. How can people praise this man so highly when this has happened?
There's also the recent revelations against avid and marm, which just make it worse.
I am very neurodivergent, and am unable to put in the time to do my own research on whether he still has bigoted mods, and whether he's said anything about the trans community recently (supportive or otherwise). (So help would be appreciated if anyone has any information on that)
Don't get me wrong, I'd love for someone to hand me a document showing that he apologised and is better, that he's banned those mods, that he's an ally for the trans community.
But I can't be sure that he is. And in a community that adores him, praises him, calls him an angel (literally), says he's the sweetest guy around, I don't feel very safe as a trans person.
And even if it is proven he's better now, I don't think I'll ever be comfortable with the angel Skizz headcanon. I never really was.
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4:21 「Oznei Haman wa Mou Iranai」 "I Don't Need Any Oznei Haman Anymore" Arranger : Shibayan Lyrics : 深水チエ / Chie Fukamizu Vocals : やなぎなぎ / yana (SENTIVE) Tra...
So here we are, again. Trigger warning: This song is sung by a tiger.
It has been a month and a half since my last real post. Or the last one I have a date recorded for, anyway. My matchmaking rant was after that point, but one could say that August 31st was the start of a bit of a soft hiatus. And, that’s a bit of a funny thing, because the end of August has, for a time, been a sort of important day for me, in a bit of a hard to describe way.
It almost feels like that’s when the year turns. I mean, I know it’s not, but for me, it kinda is, in a way. Not in any measurable way. I’m not in 2018 yet or anything, unless you’re reading this in 2018. In which case... Why? Tell me what the future’s like!
But that’s what it feels like for me, anyway. I didn’t go quiet in observation of anything, it’s just that I lost my drive to do things, and took a soft reset. Had some things to think about, and things to do. Nothing too important or interesting. And I wouldn’t say that I’m back now. Only that you might expect more posts from me than once every two months.
I still have a lot of music to talk about, but my drive to write, post, and do most anything is inconsistent at best. I could probably say something about blah blah depression or crippling anxiety about a letter that I’m waiting on from the USOoDAR... I think I got that acronym right. I could pin all this on that. But I won’t.
It’s laziness, and I need to do better. I need to be better. It’s all on me, and nobody can (or should, for that matter) make me get off my ass and do things except for me. And while it’s all fine and good to say that, doing it is another thing entirely.
Anyway, on today’s menu, we have vocals from the lovely Nagi Yanagi, who sometimes gets credited as just Nagi or Yana. All the same person, and we have this lovely Shibayan arrange on the table that she accentuates perfectly. It’s quite a dark one, but I like that~ It’s like MASA, but with more restraint.
That restraint, showing just enough, makes a piece far more beautiful. Because nothing can compare to the unseen, and how we may imagine the rest to be. Regardless of if it’s beauty, horror, or something just a bit too complicated for words, leaving someone’s imagination to fill in the details often takes works a lot farther than things as explicit as what MASA puts out.
“Alice, the song is straight up about someone wanting to eat their lover!”
Hun, if you ever see me post something by MASA Design Works, don’t click it. This is more tame, by far. It’s more on the “taboo” side and touching on someone’s insanity, rather than diving in and embracing it, such as MASA does. It’s a lighter kind of cannibalistic insanity, if you will.
Never thought I’d type that sentence. Anywho, time for a page break.
On a Facebook page I ran for a while, I did a bit of a “headcanon voice of X” segment for a while. I think I only got so far as maybe Yoshika (Stack), Chen(I think 3L?), Clownpiece(Stack), Yukari (Meramipop), and Rin, who I can’t remember at the moment. But this song would be a good depiction of how I imagine Shou sounding. While this depiction of her may be a bit more feral than I imagine the Crown Prince Shoutoku would act, I can imagine these tones, this voice, belonging to her.
It helps with the immersion, and that’s not something you think about a lot with songs. Movies, games, yes, immersion is huge. Music? Yes, musical immersion is a thing, and I think Shibayan excels with that, in a way. It’s one of the many reasons I like them!
The art with this one is wonderful too. I like OP2C’s editing, the dimming with the bright eyes help this arrange feel right at home, and she makes such a wonderful image sync with the song so well! She is deserving of the highest praises! The only complaint I have is that annotated subs don’t ever show up on Plug. It’s a good way to subtitle things, but just not quite to my taste.
I think that’s all I have to say for now. At least on the topic of music. This is the point where I’d put another “continue reading” thing, but that only works with one per post. This is where a majority of you can stop reading, because the next part is a bit more personal.
I’d like to make a public apology to a few people. You know who you are, and you know this better than I do. I have gone and either enraged, offended, or otherwise slighted a fair number of people in the last few months. I have been, and still am working through a few things. While that is no excuse for how I acted, I would like you all to know that I am working on becoming a better person, and hope to not do such things again.
I am not a good person. I have said this openly, and have more or less come to terms with it. That does not mean that I do not wish to be. So I will take another step towards that today, and open my inbox to any of those that I have hurt or slighted or wronged. I would like to work things out with you, and at least come to an understanding or some sort of closure, and I would like to offer a personal apology to those that do wish to contact me about these things.
Even if I won’t ever gel with some people, I know I have done some serious wrongs, and would at least like to make amends. I will be waiting to hear from you, and I hope we can discuss things amicably.
Silence hung thick and heavy in the defect’s room. The smell of oil, blood and cigarette smoke mixed disgustingly in the room where the offline bot sat. He’d been offline for sometime now, not willingly, of course. His battery was damaged, couldn’t hold a charge. Unaware of the issues the bot had went about his day, only to be alerted moments before he offlined.
A static buzz broke the impossibly loud quiet, as Darker’s optic onlined. Another static hiss escaped his lips as he vocalizer rebooted. Multiple warnings popped up in his HUD, warning him he had only 2% battery power left before he was offlined, permanently this time.
It took so much of his willpower to pull himself off the floor. Feeling heavy, tired and weak, he stumbled over to one of the many bookshelves and pulled it. The wood groaned and creaked as Darker moved it, a wooden door in the floor slowly becoming exposed as he did so. Books tumbled to the ground, but the bot cared little, what he needed was under that door, the books mattered not. With one last pull the shelf was out of the way, leaving the door fully exposed.
Darker pulled the door open, revealing the source of the oily stench. Various parts of other judgement units filled the hidden room in the floor. All cover in a layer of oil and blood. There were processors, optics, assorted microchips, hell, there was enough in there to make a few new bots. Darker tossed most of the pieces aside, till his claws brushed over what he was seeking. A new battery unit. His claws scratched the metal housing, trying to get a better grip on his prize.
Freeing it from the tangled mess of parts below, he wiped the unit clean with his turtleneck, not caring about the stains in would cause.
1%
Darker moved faster. Pulling the back of his shirt up, he exposed his charging port, which was right above where his battery itself was held. With on hand holding the new unit, his free hand’s claws started digging into the seems of the panel, he ripped the dented metal open, bitting back a howl of pain. He would last a single minute without a battery in before going offline. He dug his claws into his old unit and pulled it out. More warnings filled his HUD as he sloppily pushed the new unit into place. With a click, the unit connected itself to Darker. 4% battery power on this one. He shut the panel, having seen the battery was suitable.
He sighed with relief as he pulled his stained turtleneck back down, if only for a moment as he pulled the bookshelf back over the door. He picked the books back up, carefully sliding each one back into place before walking over to his makeshift charging station. He needed a good rest.
A little time passes as Claris' squishes her cheeks as she gave off an audible 'dawh' to the bot. "Oooo! Darker got the hots for someone!" she cooed, as the brightly colored mask of a friend peered from behind her.
"No, no, no, you misunderstand! I was merely re-enacting a part of a novel!" Darker hurriedly muttered through the whirring of his chest and quiet crackle of the sparks. "N-nothing more!"
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"Mr. Darker~! Where you going with those flowers?" chimed a familiar voice from behind, stopping a ways in the middle, noticing the sparks emitting from the bot. "Uhh, you doing alright? Why do you have your face all covered up?"
Darker hastily drops the flowers and pulls his head out of his turtleneck. He whips around to face Claris, sparking even more.
"Uh, Claris! Hey! I was just, rehearsing something, nothing to big!" he chuckles, a nervous smile on his face.
