#daizue

i wanna tackle on the future drama cds that are said to be happenings after the final episode.

So I checked twitter and the website, and I am concerned about Check-7. As people from twitter are asking, “Are they trying to make Haru x Suzue a thing!?”

B1tch.... As far as the anime has shown us, clearly Suzue only has eyes for Daisuke, right? She cooks, she cleans, she is literally Daisuke’s “(top secret) secretary”.

And if they planned on making Haru x Suzue a thing then they should have given more hints to it in the anime. Haru blushing over her is not enough to set aside the fact that he saw Daisuke and Suzue get out of a room thinking he just walked in on them post-fvcking. Suzue doesn’t even react a certain way to Haru! She’s basically just being kind to her MVP’s “buddy”/co-worker. Literally no chemistry between them LMAO!

Even in the very last episode, Suzue’s only interaction with him was saying “Thank you” to him; Haru passing out and Suzue catching him doesn’t even count as a hint.

How in the world are the creators supposed to make her and Haru a thing so suddenly? Like OH is Haru going to say he likes Suzue cuz of yada yada qualities, and how will Suzue react to this? Like will they just suddenly make Suzue say “Thank you, Kato-sama... I like you too” BULLSH1T?? If this was a decoy mission then I’d accept it but No we’re talking about the popo here, one of the MCs... Clearly they will be forcing a relationship that is just not... that should not be...

OR is Haru going to be the one to ask Suzue what she is to Daisuke and we get the real reveal there? Honestly what are they thinking... Foreshadows are BS btw 😂

Ackermans & Kambes

***(Edited version with additional information re; Daisuke’s parents and Haru)***

Hey gang, so I had this nagging thought to write this awhile back and it just escalated after I watched Episode 10. So now my brain won’t leave me alone until I’ve shared this with you.

I would again, like to reiterate that only FOUR TIMES in the entire 10 episodes of FKBU so far, has Daisuke shown a soft, genuine smile. This man has been incredibly traumatised since childhood. He is apathetic, frustrated and emotionless and essentially an asshole at best. He has lost all reason to smile. The post traumatic stress sits very heavily on him.

Considering how he grew up as a happy kid, it was absolutely heartbreaking when that happiness was taken from him. So to see Daisuke show any type of soften emotion was incredibly profound. It shows a vulnerable side to him, because that side has been severely repressed. 

I don’t want to go all social workey on everyone here but I just want to explain something. In those who have experienced significant trauma, they no longer view the world as a safe place. So Daisuke’s suppressed emotions were the only way he saw fit to survive in a ‘hostile world.’ When positive emotions are expressed, it makes the trauma survivor vulnerable. How? Because in Daisuke’s case, as a child, positive emotions were associated with feeling unsafe. He grew up happily along side his parents, only to witness his father murder his mother.

So any time a trauma survivor wants to show positive emotions (be it consciously or subconsciously), they must feel safe, because it makes them vulnerable. 

The only four times Daisuke showed any sort of soft, genuine, smile-like emotion were:

When he came home. Given his unstable relationship with Grandma, I can make an educated guess that returning home was not for her or mostly for her. And we are not going to include the butler because that relationship was more professional.

Directly after this scene, Daisuke proceeded to cook for Suzue (and only her). In other words, I can take a guess that he was happy to finally return home to placate Suzue’s worries and be mostly in her company.

When he made food for Suzue. This man was so proud of himself istg ... just look at him .. but y’know, we have seen him with a proud smug face before, but this one was a soft and genuine one.

When he reassured Suzue that he will make it home alive.

When he carried Suzue in the OP

So what am I trying to say? 

They are all related to Suzue in some way or another.

Suzue made Daisuke feel safe enough to express vulnerable emotions (in this case, positive ones). Throughout the anime, the dynamics between Suzue and Daisuke were solely based on trust. Daisuke trusted Suzue with his life. He knew she will always be there for him no matter what. 

In that above scene where Daisuke reassured Suzue he will return home, Suzue, despite knowing the dangers, trusted him to follow through and keep himself alive. There was a hidden promise in the words he used and the way he said it.

Can I also add something too?

Compare the above two scenes to the two below

What do you see?

Daisuke does NOT like being touched.

Sure, Daisuke was visibly injured in the scenes with Haru, but he was not injured enough that he could no longer fight or walk on his own. What this meant was that Daisuke did not shove Suzue away or remove his hand from hers because he was not physically injured. It meant he has an immense level of trust in her. Daisuke may have initially been uncomfortable and unsure with Suzue’s actions, but he eventually allowed her to remain on him.

(Edit:) I’d like to explain the above part a little better as I realised it can get a bit confusing. Some of you may think that Daisuke pushed Haru away because he was physically weak and injured and therefore vulnerable. Which means you may also think that he did not push Suzue away or remove his hand from hers because he was not physically weak/injured at the time. 

This was not the case. Daisuke simply did not like being touched because of his trauma. How did I speculate this? Daisuke was able to fight pretty well, despite being injured, so in essence, if he truly did push Haru away because of his injuries, he should not be able to fight or function for the sake of being physically vulnerable. That would be more of a probable explanation. But instead, Daisuke was still strong enough to walk and push on, which meant the likely explanation to refusing physical assistance was: Daisuke’s trauma

Remember this. Trauma survivors do not often like being touched, particularly when they have witnessed/experienced violence as a child. They view the world as an unsafe place.

(Edit:) So in other words, it was not because of his injuries or physical vulnerable state that made Daisuke push Haru away, it was because he did not like being touched by someone who has not earned that high level of trust. If Suzue was in Haru’s place on that boat scene, Daisuke most likely would have allowed her to assist him because she has earned that high level of trust.

This does not mean Daisuke does not trust Haru. As we saw in Episode 10, Daisuke grew to respect and trust Haru. But not at the level where he was comfortable with being physically touched. That’s literally a whole new level.  (And no, a bump into the ass or brush on the shoulder does not count as proper physical touch). 

When you have been betrayed as a child, and you view the world as an awful place, the idea of ‘trust’ does not exist. You won’t understand what that means because you will think there is no point in trusting people -  they will just betray you. It’s more significant when this breach of trust occurred as a child.

So rebuilding trust for trauma survivors take a very, very long time. They have to learn to trust all over again, and even then, they may not trust just anyone. In Daisuke’s case, he ticked all the above. To have earned that level of respect where a traumatised Daisuke would trust someone with his life, Suzue must be one incredible woman. She must be so damn important to him, even though it may not be obvious all the time.

(Edit:) I’d also like to briefly add something here. There may be other significant reason for the bridal carry in the OP. It may indicate that Daisuke is indeed comfortable enough to have Suzue that (physically) close to him.

Seeing how I have seen quite a lot of anime where there are significant trauma involved as the storyline, I can definitely see the same patterns emerging with FKBU re; Daisuke’s story.

So I would like to end it on something.

In the above scene, Daisuke’s indirect way of showing he cared for Suzue was not out of the ordinary for someone who has been traumatised. There may not be a direct apology (or maybe there was behind the scenes??) we could see, but trauma greatly suppresses proper emotional development (and particularly when it happened to him as a growing child). 

So Daisuke may not fully understand the right way to make amends or how to resolve the situation. He may not even think what he did was wrong, so his way of trying to amend things (whether with an apology intended or without), was to make food for Suzue.

Needless to say that Suzue was very forgiving and so extremely patient with him. Patience, support and empathy are key to supporting trauma survivors. Fuck. The more I analyse this, the more I realise how deeply profound Daizue’s relationship is ❤️

EDIT:

Daisuke’s Parents and Haru

Someone asked me a very interesting question about Daisuke’s trauma, his father and the photo frame of his parents on his bedside table.

Without delving too much into the complexity of trauma, the likely plausible explanation would be that Daisuke still has some form of attachment and love for his father. Trauma survivors can still love the person who betrayed them, despite holding a grudge towards them at the same time. It is not an unusual/uncommon thing. This would be a lot more significant for those who experienced childhood trauma. So to me, it sounded like Daisuke loved and got along well with both his parents.

The picture on his bedside table may be a representation of what he has lost - a happy childhood, so he still kept it there, not necessarily as a reminder, but as a form of subconscious attachment he has for his parents.

Haru vs Daisuke

The same person also queried about the differing traumas between these two. Whilst it is never an appropriate thing to compare traumas, I’m happy to explain this for the sake of understanding.

Haru’s trauma occurred during a one off incident that ended up spiralling into some form of post traumatic stress. Whilst we do not know about Haru’s past, based on his personality and some tiny hints along the way, Haru most likely grew up in a relatively normal family. So Haru was able to bounce back and overcome his trauma relatively well (as we saw in Episode 10, he finally fired a gun!).

Daisuke, however, is a different story. Daisuke’s trauma is extremely complex because of the age he experienced it, and the type as well. Trauma involving close families that end up in violence and murder is one of the biggest betrayals of trust, particularly for a child. 

As I stated earlier, Daisuke no longer viewed the world as a safe place. His trauma was deeply ingrained and it shaped his emotional development and his interactions with others. If you look at Grandma and both Daisuke’s parents, you can see that they were relatively ‘normal’ in terms of emotional development. That is, you can see that they showed more varied emotions and their interactions with others were not ... weird. 

But if you compare them with adult Daisuke, it is very different. Immediately you can say that there is definitely something wrong with him. And I am not talking about how he grew up rich, because that is a separate thing. I am talking more about his emotional responses to people.

Suzue is angry for the first time and Daisuke needs to keep up with her bad mood the entire morning. How is he handling it?

~o0o~

This was supposed to be a positive morning for Suzue because Daisuke told her yesterday that he's going to take a day off just to catch up on his time with her and she was so enthusiastic about it that one simple thing as perid cramps decided on ruining her instantly. It was early in the day, 7:15h so to speak, and she was already in shock and fed up with the entire situation. And as if this wasn't troublesome enough; she wasn't able to find any medications in her drawer. She checked in the nightstand, closet, shelves, counter. Nothing, she couldn't find anything and the pain in her stomach was becoming more and more unbearable.

She couldn't leave the palace this instant because she needed to take care of Daisuke first. She entered his room writhing a little because of how much it hurted her. She already hated everything about this day and everything around her, she became more stressed and more emotional. She tried to wake him up gently at first but when he didn't react on her attempts right away, she took the glass from his nightstand and showed it back somewhat forcefully, making a loud thud. Daisuke jumped a little from how startled it made him and Suzue greeted him with annoyed look on her face.

"Butler already informed me about the breakfast. You're free to come down and join." She handed him certain clothes without asking for approval "You can also put these on. I'll be waiting for you once you're ready."

Suzue turned around and left without putting much of a conversation between them. Daisuke noticed how stiff she looked but concluded that she probably "woke up on the wrong side of the bed" and therefore didn't want to ask further about it. Still, it wasn't like Suzue to be this irritated in the morning since he always got used to her friendly greetings and a big smile on her face. He got himself dressed and went downstairs where an elegant spacious dining room was located.

A classic British breakfast was served, 7:30h, the pair was sitting at the dark wooden table with magnificent displays of gold plate from George IV's enormous collection and enjoyed their meal. If you were just a mere visitor to their household you probably wouldn't notice such things, but Daisuke was perfectly aware of Suzue's unnerved behavior. She cut her meal quite frustrated and she even criticized the lack of flavor in it. And although she wasn't showing it as much, her dissatisfaction was present and she became angry, much to Daisuke's surprise. Daisuke grew worried because, for him, the meal tasted just fine and as much as he wanted to hold himself back from further antagonizing her when she already felt bad enough, he couldn't ignore it and he needed to interfere. He didn't have the heart to ignore her like this.

"Suzue. Did you sleep well last night?"

"Of course I did. What kind of question is that supposed to be?"

Ouch that hurt. Daisuke would usually feel offended by such an act but this was Suzue he was talking to so he decided to be stubborn.

"I don't know. If someone upset you in any way you're free to tell me and I'll take care of them personally."

"Daisuke-sama, with all due respect I'm not feeling especially obligated as of today's date to worry much about when I'm supposed to be free to do something or not. I am a person, I have feelings, and I'll decide on doing things when I'm feeling like doing them. I'm not asking for anyone's permission to express my free will."

Suzue took her plate, handed it to butler and left the room.

For the first time in a long time Daisuke felt broken. It's funny because he usually never paid attention to other people or their unnecessary outbursts of emotions which he always found uncomfortable and incredibly impractical, but then again, this was Suzue he was talking to and he became seriously worried about her.

Whenever he wanted to check on her she made an annoyed expression and whenever he tried to start a conversation with her she ended it quickly.

"That video you wanted to show me the other day-"

"I changed my mind. It wouldn't be as entertaining for you because you never find anything funny anyways. I wonder what satisfies you anymore."

Another low blow and Daisuke felt like crumbling. Although he decided that he'll wait for her until she calms down. Or not? He wasn't used to her lack of attention and he enjoyed it so much while it lasted. Suzue was usually the clingy one in their relationship but today the roles were switched and he wanted to bring the old smiling Suzue back.

"What do you say about watching your favorite series together?"

"I watched it yesterday, today is the rerun."

"I brought you some fashion magazines I thought you might like."

"Thank you, I'll check them later."

"Would you like to check these new gadget parts I found with HEUSC? He couldn't estimate the quality of the product so I'm asking for your opinion."

"I'm not interested as of now, I'll search them when I have the time."

"Would you like some tea in your favorite kitty cup?"

Suzue put down whatever she was reading at the moment and looked at him with serious expression on her face.

"I'm perfectly capable of making tea for myself. I'm sorry Daisuke-sama, but why are you being like that?"

"Like what?"

"The way you're being, you're unusually clingy today and I didn't even ask for any of it. Why are you giving me such a hard time? I need a break."

Suzue was about to climb the stairs which led to her bedroom.

"I'm sorry." Daisuke said quietly and Suzue instantly stopped on her tracks. She never heard him talk like this before and it broke her heart. She could feel his hurt and regret and she wondered how it came to all of this.

Daisuke continued "I took a day off with the intent of spending more time with you and although I'm really bad at showing what I feel when expressing myself most of the time, the idea of being with you after so long made me feel genuinely happy. I'm sorry if it sounds self-centered or selfish, I'm always talking about me and my feelings when I never considered asking other people about their own. I always pre-determined what others should be doing without giving it that much thought about their opinions before coming up with my own decisions. And no matter how much I try I'm always screwing it up, I'm a terrible person."

When he looked up at Suzue he wasn't expecting her to cry and he became alarmed.

"Y-you're not a terrible person. Please never say that again. It's me, I'm the one who screwed everything. M-my stomachache won't subdue and I didn't take my painkillers."

...

"Oh."

Daisuke came up to her on the stairs and picked her up bridal style. Suzue squeaked a little.

"W-what are you doing?"

"I'm taking you to my room because I know where the stuff I'm looking for is placed. But I can always take you to yours if you tell me where you're keeping things."

"I-I don't mind your room.."

Daisuke smirked at her.

"DON'T GIVE ME THAT FACE MR.!!"

"Okay okay, jesus." he kissed her forehead and pushed the door with his leg.

Once he placed her on the bed, he tucked her in a bunch of pillows and blankets and gave her the phone.

"I'm sorry to say this but please wait for me 20min or so, I'll try to come back as soon as possible."

With this said, Daisuke disappeared into the hallways and left Suzue alone with her thoughts. She knew that Daisuke gave her the phone to entertain herself but right now she couldn't think of anything else but the thing that just happened between them and the way she mistreated him this entire time. The guilt squeezed her heart and worsened her stomach pain.

Daisuke, on the other hand, mentally panicked because he didn't know what to do right now. He never had a sister and his mother died and he absolutely didn't have the slightest idea on what to do. He did his research with HEUSC, he talked to butlers and once he grasped the concept of it, he drew his Bentley Continental GT *maniac style like he always did* to the nearest store and bought

✨💴 EVERYTHING 💴✨ *fu-gou ke-i-ji song playing in the background*. Even the cashier lady couldn't believe that a man could look this badass while buying half of the aisle lmao.

Daisuke returned on time with butlers helping him carry everything and Suzue looked surprised upon seeing so many bags being brought into her room.

Daisuke approached her with a bag of his own and squatted next to her.

"Here we have pain killers, snacks, napkins, hygiene products, essential oils, I even bought heating pads and massage pillows. I didn't know whether you'd prefer Twinings or Yorkshire so I bought them both-"

"You bought the companies?!"

"I bought the tea."

Suzue sighed in relief.

"And I bought cocoa, chocolate and double-layered socks to keep you warm."

"What's the package at the bottom of the bag?"

"Oh.. it's nothing."

"Daisuke-sama you're terrible at lying."

"Alright. It's something that I bought just in case."

He took the package out and Suzue blushed.

...

"I'm.. not implying anything it's just to make you feel better. If you want you can use me as well.."

".. Thank you."

The blush couldn't leave both of their faces so Daisuke put everything aside and headed towards the doors.

"I'm going to make Earl grey because it goes well with chocolate. I'll be right back."

With this said, he left the room and Suzue squeaked in her hands.

Did he.. seriously just thought about the things she assumed he did? He really considered it for her own sake..

When he returned he placed the painkillers, cup of tea and chocolate box on the nightstand before joining her on the other side of the bed. He searched Claire Luvcat and they watched Cream Heroes together. Suzue smiled so much upon looking at the screen showing her beautiful kittens. Daisuke made her smile again and it made him proud.

"Which one is your favorite?"

"Oh" Suzue was taken by surprise "I like Lulu because he's funny and cute."

"Should I buy him?"

Suzue just laughed sweetly "No it's her cat, I'm pretty sure she wouldn't put her cat on sale for any money in this world. Besides, the cat would be really sad when separated from her owner. It's where he belongs, they're practically inseparable."

"Like you and me?"

Suzue squeaked again and Daisuke smiled.

"Mr. Coco reminds me of Furry Elise a lot. I like him, they'd have a nice litter."

"Thinking of becoming a breeder?" Suzue teased him.

"Not really, although it brings good money. Somewhere around ¥158.386,50 for a kitten."

"Seriously?!"

"Yes if the parents are two purebred cats. Coco is a British longhair and Furry Elise is Maine Coon. Besides, you'll get too attached and wouldn't allow me to separate them from you so it's a losing game."

Suzue laughed fondly "It's true, sometimes money can't buy everything."

Daisuke hugged her closer to himself and kissed her head.

"Daisuke-sama.."

"Hm?"

"I wanted to apologize for everything I told you early in the morning. I didn't mean it, the things I said were not true and it was reckless of me to even address you with such disrespect. You were trying to make me feel better this entire time and everything I did in return was rejecting your every attempt. I'm so sorry for offending you like this."

Daisuke turned her face gently towards his own and made her look him in the eyes.

"You'd never offend me, Suzue. There's no way in millions years that you'd be able to do things like this, because you're kindhearted and overall a beautiful person. Remember that."

Suzue looked at him with so much adoration in her eyes.

"Besides, you're right. I'm not the one to decide what people should do with themselves and by not doing anything for you when you needed me the most, I'd feel like I'm letting you down and you definitely didn't deserve that. In fact, you deserve so much better and I'd like to live up to your expectations, if you let me."

"I do. I just hope that I didn't ruin your plans for today."

"This is exactly how I wanted it to spend, together with you."

Maybe he didn't deserve her but Daisuke promised himself to make sure that Suzue feels appreciated every single day.

@daisuzuship @innovativestruggles @narcopharmacist @unholysoggytea @riaymei @ieatcrumbs @cow-goes-oof @matchabucks @bluegleeful @levi-is-heicho @kakooshi @kokorokai @darknessrxse @fluffyyagiza @geniusmeemee @sungmnnnn @koalarin @alstroemerie @petiamaximoff38 @hellohellokookie @marialenikiforov @milcyuw

Also, hope Suzue doesn’t come off as too Mary Sue in this, even though I did kind of deliberately write her this way because it’s mostly in Daisuke’s POV...being the fifteen year old he is, he doesn’t really get all the feelings he’s feeling hehehe...

--

Everywhere You Go

He’d been moodily staring out of the window of the car, ignoring the girl sat next to him.

Since they attended different private schools and had different schedules, it wasn’t usual that they rode home together. Today had been one of those rare exceptions.

She’d been standing by the gates of her school, talking to other students when the car had arrived. Daisuke had watched her smile and converse animatedly with her schoolmates, obvious by the way the others responded to her that she was well-liked. She’d greeted him with the same warmth when she entered the car but all he managed was a curt nod.

So Daisuke was all depressed and a shell of himself, who didn’t care about anything after his mother’s mysterious death.

But once Suzue sent him the glasses she made along with a letter revealing she found a huge lead to his mother’s case he found the will to be ‘alive’ again

It’s just amazing how Suzue was helping Daisuke and researching about his mother’s death for a long while and was the one who got him back on his feet

If we didn’t have suzue we wouldn’t had this show lmao

Stan queen Suzue 💓💓💓

•••••

And one more thing but...

My bb Suzue worrying for Daisuke 🤧💞