#cw panic

You called your boss, briefly explaining that you’d been briefly kidnapped and in need of leave from work in order to handle the legal and emotional fall out of that for at least a couple of weeks. Thankfully, your boss believed you, rather than demanding to see some sort of proof of this… Although, given how utterly busy most of the local astartes were since the failed kidnapping… You wouldn’t be surprised if everyone in the small town you lived in knew that something nearly catastrophic had happened, from the way the astartes were near-feverishly fortifying and patrolling the town.

Vanya rarely left your side, giving his reports about his side of things while holding you - either carrying you in a princess or bridal carry, or when he was feeling less clingy, merely holding your hand in one of his, or touching your back or one of your shoulders with a hand. 

You couldn’t blame him for his desire for closeness. His presence at your side was immensely reassuring, as was the proof that he could and would track you down, when he could sense that you were in danger, heedless of the potential danger to himself. You could tell that he really didn’t like interacting with the dark green and brass accented astartes - especially the one with the spooky skull helmet. Normally you’d try to pester him into telling you why - to at least get a general vibe as to why your grumpy and less-social astartes didn’t like them…

But right now? All you wanted was to stay by Vanya’s side and hide away from the world. It wasn’t a healthy or productive thing to do, especially since your house was still a mess from when your kidnappers had torn it apart searching for you… You’d gotten a message from one of the detectives working the case.You were free to return home and try and put your house back together. That had been this morning.

Vanya had asked you to come with him, to watch him spar with several of the more restive Salamanders less than a minute after you’d gotten that message, and you’d taken the distraction with both hands. You weren’t sure how Vanya would react to the news that you and he could return back to your home… You both shared many good memories there, but…

You shiver as you suppress memories of being dragged out of bed at gunpoint and threatened into compliance by strangers and shoved into the back of a van with a half-dozen of your fellow astartes-bonded neighbors. 

Vanya was using his wings to great effect in the sparring ring. Not only did the ability to fly allow him to fight in more directions than his opponents, his preferred combat style - a sudden ambush from a great height was much easier to achieve when he could fly upwards and watch his opponents spar with each other before dropping on one of them from his perch with a low, playful cackle. 

His hit and run tactics had gotten him more than a few grumbles, but Vanya had pointed out with a sniff that they needed to learn how to deal with a variety of approaches to combat. Not everyone had the same approach to how fights and battles should be fought and won, after all.  Nadesir won slightly more than he lost, though after he’d been snatched out of the air and thrown to another salamander and pinned, he’d surrendered again and slunk over to you, a pout on his face, his wings low and tail wrapping around your leg as he scooped you up. “I am done sparring for today. Is there anything you’d like to do today?”

You sigh as you lean into his sweaty body, wrinkling your nose a little. His scent was much more intense when he sweated, and while you enjoyed his masculine musk… He still needed a bath. “Apart from sharing a shower with you? Not much, although… The police detectives say that we can return to my house. They’ve finished cataloging all the evidence they’ve found.”

A low rumble leaves Vanya at that as he holds you closer, shaking his head a little “The Dark Angels are still investigating our primary nest, as well as the nests of the others who had been taken. Their process takes longer, but is ultimately more thorough.”

“So… Are Dark Angels like… Astartes cops?” You ask, really wanting to know what their whole deal was, and why their presence made so many of the astartes you had wary and watchful.

“Mmmrrrr… Sort of? They are… Investigators. Interrogators. Seekers of truth and their… Particular brand of justice. Keepers of secrets and dangers untold.” Vanya explained, holding you a little tighter to his chest, his tail nearly painful in the way it squeezed your leg. 

“Ah. Easy, Vanya… I’m right here, love.” You murmur, reaching up and gently cupping his face with both of your hands, shifting a little in his grip to press kisses to his cheeks and lips “Spooky Space Cops, got it. Do you have an idea as to when they’ll be done investigating our home?”

Vanya shook his head “No. Dark Angel Investigations take the time that they take… To try and rush them is to bring their intense scrutiny down on you and all those you love and know. Or have contact with. Now or ever. They are… Intense.” The grip that his tail had on your leg relaxes enough to not twinge anymore. 

“I’m starting to get a better picture of them, yeah… Alright. Are we able to cook on our own, or is the cafeteria on base the only sort of cooking allowed? I’ve been wanting to make something with my own hands for a couple of days, and I’ve never been good at stitch-craft. Despite my mother’s and grandmother’s best efforts at trying to teach me.” You sigh, cuddling Vanya a little more. 

“... Speaking of family, do you wish to tell any of them about what… What happened to  you? I know that your sister worries for you a great deal.” Vanya asks hesitantly.

You shake your head vigorously “Oh no. Not right now. I don’t think I’m allowed to, given that I’m part of an active police investigation, even as one of the… One of the victims, and she’ll get the rest of the family involved and they’ll try and convince me to move back in with one of them and not let up about it for months if not years. It’ll be a whole circus and I’d rather avoid that entirely.” Your family meant well… But could be intensely suffocating and frustrating at times. You had your reasons for moving cross-country and into the small town you were currently living in… And  you had no idea how they would react to Vanya, who would absolutely follow you anywhere.

… And there were some things about your family that you hadn’t told Vanya yet. That you… Maybe should have. But it’s been almost a decade since you had been dragged to any of the family functions, in part because of your busy career and distance from the rest of them. 

“As you wish, my moon.” Vanya hummed, nuzzling you again “After the shower, do you want to do some more self-defense training?”

That was something that Vanya had insisted you begin learning, after… After you and he had calmed down enough to stop holding each other tightly. You’d learned some self-defense as a teenager, but it was nowhere near as thorough as the training that Vanya was putting you through. “But we’ll - or at least I’ll get all sweaty during self defense training, which would render the shower pointless… So self-defense training first, then shower?”

It was amazing how fast a person’s mood could change, depending on where they were. Cedric had spent the rest of the day with two of his firstborn Brothers and his anxieties over making a good first impression and how they might react to his existence had entirely melted away by the end of the first hour that he’d been blessed to spend in their presence. The young Apothecary hadn’t noticed the hours slip by until they’d guided him back to the base, well after sunset.

Apothecary Zariel was waiting for him at the entrance of the base, a small smile on the Ultramarine’s fair features as he waved a cheerful goodbye to Brothers Arnault and Roland. “There you are, lad. I was beginning to wonder if they’d decided to steal you away from us.”

Cedric shuffled his feet a little and blinked in confusion at the older Apothecary “Why would they? Neither of them is part of a Crusade of wandering Black Templars. They live with their bonded humans, and we’ve only just met.” He’d not make such a decision to leave lightly - especially not since Jophiel was still recovering in Cedric’s assigned quarters on base. He hadn’t quite informed anyone else that he’d found the injured Primaris Blood Angel… But given how weird they could be about Jophie’s wings… He felt that it was a bit too much of a risk just yet.

Besides, the firstborn marines knew about the other three Primaris Marines on base! And once Jophiel was back to full health, he’d promised to introduce himself to Captain Ash’val at least. 

“I suppose that’s fair. How was your outing with your older brothers?” Zariel asked, the warm smile on his face brightening a little further.

“It was great! They showed me to some of their favorite places around the city! I got to stretch my legs and see  more of Ancient Terra and I got to talk to firstborn Brothers who-” weren’t disgusted by me and wanted to kill me on sight. Was the rest of Cedric’s sentence. He bit that off, Claude’s warning about the Teal in Zariel’s armor ringing loudly “-were really nice and friendly!” He really hoped that the older marine hadn’t noticed the brief pause in his speech.

The slight narrowing of the other’s eyes as the older apothecary guided him with a hand pressing against the small of his back caused Cedric’s hearts to sink a little. As was the fact that the other led him to his office “I’m glad to hear that, Cedic. Now, there’s something that I’d like to ask you about. A little incident that happened earlier today, in fact.”

“Oh, what might that be?” Cedric asked, tilting his head a little as he looked at the other.

“Well, as you’re well aware, the only humans allowed on base are ones who are bonded to a marine. As much for their safety as our own. This base is one of the places where we can truly get privacy, but that privacy only exists when our boundaries are properly enforced.” Zariel explains, gesturing for Cedric to sit down in one of the chairs in his office as he closed the door behind the younger Astartes.

“... Is there a reason why you are reiterating this, sir? I am well aware of all of the rules and regulations in this base, unless something has changed while I was out with my older brothers?” Cedric asked, deliberately staying still, not allowing his eyes to widen in anxiety, nor to hide his hands behind his back, or fidget them in his lap, betraying his rising anxiety. 

So he had been seen on one of the cameras with the teenage humans, despite his best efforts. Damn. But why talk to him like this, rather than order him to confess by one of the chaplains, where his punishment would begin? He could hear the whistling-crack and the familiar sting of an electro-whip across his back and chest already, and was silently bracing for the pain, before mentally dragging himself back to the present.

“I happened to be in the security camera room, as one of our watch officers had a minor arrhythmic episode with both his primary and secondary hearts - he has since recovered from that episode and is in the infirmary for overnight episodes for further monitoring. While I was tending to him, I just so happen to catch you, running as fast as you can with four baseline human teenagers holding onto you. Considering the speed at which you were moving, and the fact that I’d only seen you scurry around on a couple of camera edges… I can only assume you were sprinting around with the intent to not be seen. Care to explain yourself? I’m sure you had good reason, I just… I’d like to hear your side of things before I escalate this issue to captain Ash’val, or to one of the chaplains on base.” Zariel asked, his smile warm, his voice pleasant… 

And his armor ever so slightly the wrong shade of blue. 

Fuck. 

This was not the kind of situation that Cedric wanted to be in, especially as he had no idea if this was an attempt to give him enough synth-rope to hang himself, or a trap to snare him in, or a mixture of the two. Should he try and deny everything? But with… Him potentially still being on base and available to Pry The Truth from his lips should Cedric decide not to cooperate… And his Primaris brothers unaware of the.. Of the… of Him potentially still on base, waiting to find them like the threat he had categorically proven himself to be… Cedric’s mouth went dry and he hung his head, eyes on the floor. “I am absent of reason or excuse, sir. I found four baseline teenagers who had snuck into the base and aided them in leaving, rather than bringing them to holding to be properly processed.”

That was true enough. Cedric didn’t want to admit to the cowardice he’d shown in fleeing with them, rather than facing the monst-... Honorable Firstborn Brother Chaplain with them in tow. 

“Now Cedric, please don’t make things more difficult for us both. I know very well that there is nothing that you do without deliberate reasoning and intent. For example, I know for a fact that you are taking more dry rations than you normally do because you have hidden an injured Brother in your personal quarters. Again. Please tell me the truth, I can help you if you do. Explain to me what was going through your head, what made aiding these baselines the best decision in the moment.” Zariel sighed, shaking his head a little, one cool hand touching Cedric’s chin and forcing him to look upwards into the Firstborn’s eyes.

Eyes that were more teal than true ocean blue. 

“I… I heard Chaplain Feldarim speaking to someone nearby who I… I was not prepared nor ready to face. Who is heavy handed in his punishments of others and who would have taken a keen interest in the harmless intruders, even if I had taken them to another superior officer to be processed properly, sir.” Cedric explained, hating the fact that his eyes were swimming with treacherous tears that he refused to let fall, that his breathing was fast and shallow and that his hearts were beating rapidly at the back of his throat, making his voice small and trembling.

“... I see. What were you concerned that this… Strict disciplinarian would have done to these baseline teenagers, had he known that they were there and in need of punishing? If, say for example, they were neophytes who’d misbehaved to the degree that baselines had.” Zariel presses, raising an eyebrow at him.

“A thousand electro-whip lashes, followed by a salt and vinegar treatment of their injuries, orders to not seek treatment for those lashes and harsh physical labor and additional training, sir. Not just for them, but for their squads if they were from separate squads, sir. They would have been trained until they dropped where they stood and whipped awake after an hour of rest for weeks, with minimal food and water to sustain their basal metabolic systems.” Cedric answered in as a calm, measured tone of voice as he could manage. “I have no idea what he would do to Terran born baseline humans and had no desire to find out. He’s… I’ve been put in charge of the clean-up of his past… Punishments before. Before both of us were brought to Ancient Terra, and I’d rather not… Not do that again.”

Zariel let out a low whistle, and finally let go of Cedric’s face, gently patting him on the head. “Thank you for telling me about that. I’ve heard that Black Templars are particularly strict with each other, but I hadn’t known for sure, as I haven’t interacted with many Black Templars before, other than you, and by the Reputation of your chapter alone, I know that you are unusually gentle and kind. This particular disciplinarian, I suspect he’s going to be staying in this base for a couple of days… Which would make it difficult for you to avoid him, if you remained here.”

A low, panicked wheezing sound filled the room for several seconds. Cedric slowly started to slide out of the chair in abject embarrassed horror when he realized that he himself was making that sound. 

“Woah… hey, hey, hey… It’s okay… Okay, floor time, huh? Breathe with me, nice and easy. Follow my breathing pattern, okay young one? I’m not about to allow anyone to hurt you. Especially not someone who scares you this much. Shhh, shhh.. Shhh… it’s alright… Just breathe with me… In… and out… In… and out…” Zariel soothed as he knelt on the ground next to Cedric, slowly lowering him the rest of the way to the floor. He grabbed one of the younger medic’s hands and placed it on his chest, so that he could track more easily how he was breathing. One of his hands kept Cedric’s on his chest, the other started to rub soothing circles into the younger marine’s back.

It took Cedric minutes to calm himself down, and he found himself leaning into Zariel, face hidden in the other’s shoulder, tears soaking into the other’s scrub top.”S…Sorry sir… I… I didn't mean to lose composure like that.”

“We all have our moments of being overwhelmed, young one. Now, let’s get you out of this base for a couple of days, yeah? Hura needs help wrangling a panicky loyalist thousand son freshly transplanted to Ancient Terra, and I’m quite certain that you would be the best fit to check him over and help him calm down.” Zariel murmured soothingly. “The sooner the better. You wanna go in about… Ten minutes, give or take? I’ll fill out the formwork to give to the commander, and Hura will escort you to the Chaos Base the Thousand Son is at. It’s gonna take a couple of days to get there, and the wandering warband of Templars never stays in one place for more than three days if none of them are injured.”

Cedric nodded “I… Alright. I don’t… I don’t mind helping Apothecary Hura with tasks like that.”