An update on the evil soda challenge I did with two of my coworkers last night:
-Ranch: made me gag, made the others concerned about how I’d know for a fact that this tasted like sweet, watered down cum. Made my coworker laugh heartily because I said I had heterosexuality war flashbacks. 1/10
-Butter: not bad. Honestly tasted like butter beer but buttery-er. 7/10
-Grass: also not bad. We picked out several flavors ranging from lime to cucumber to parsley. Nuanced, interesting little green concoction. The not-bisexual-and-he-knows-because-he’s-slept-with-several-men-and-would-do-it-again-in-a-straight-way-any-day libertarian said I should mix it with midori and vodka or gin and elderflower liqueur. This is the best opinion he’s ever had. I’m doing this next time I go to rocket fizz. 8.5/10
-Enchilada: mid. We all agreed that it needed to go harder with the pepper. Instead it felt like the creators figured *that* was the flavor they needed to subdue and they were wrong. 4/10
-Bacon: the not-bisexual libertarian thought it tasted like motor oil in a good way, reminded him of Afghanistan. I need to ask him if he’s tasted motor oil before. He probably has. I agree that it tasted like motor oil but definitely in a bad way. It tastes like charred grease on a stove. Workwife didn’t quite agree, said it was like if someone fucked up root beer really, really badly. I think all of those are true. -1000/10
-Mustard: wasn’t horrible until five seconds after we swallowed it. It was funny to watch all our faces go from “not bad” to “oh god what have we done”. Extremely cursed to be drinking a sweet soda and then experience pure Pickle Relish And Mustard aftertaste. Horrible experience. Solid 2/10
This has been Evil Soda Reviews
