getting into a committed relationship with this man and winning his trust is an arduous process. but once you have him, you have him.
so, what would crocodile do to save you?
crocodile is the type to make a deal with the devil for your sake. being the few that have won his trust, the possibility of you dying is unnacceptable. he’d go mad with desperation to save you.
crocodile is known to work with cold-blooded and brutal efficiency. it’s different with you. with you, it’s erratic brutality fueled by desperation. the civil war he brought to alabasta would look like child’s play when your life is at stake.
he’d be selfish enough to sacrifice your loved ones so you’d live instead. you could hate him for it all you want but even if time turned back he’d still make the same choice.
knowing the consequences in his head and seeing it play out in front of him is something else entirely. he wasn’t prepared for the full force of your grief.
a part of him can’t help but feel bitter it’s better than guilt that this is what he gets for saving you. don’t you realize what you do to him? he’s become a wreck at even the thought of losing you.
rather than express any of this to you, crocodile seems like he’s only upset that you have the gall to question him. he doesn’t have the emotional intelligence to apologize and explain that it wasn’t a decision he made lightly. he can’t put it into words because that would mean sitting with his own fear and anxiety long enough to do so.
putting you under lock-and-key is as much about your safety as it is about making sure you don’t leave him. there’ll be enough time for you to eventually forgive him. even if it might be a pipe dream, the thought of you alive and hating him is far more tolerable than you dead.
it’s a question of whether he’ll eventually realize his mistake in caging you. it would mean actively trying to earn your forgiveness rather than futilely attempting to bury the past through hollow gestures. it would mean accepting the possibility of you never seeing him again and that you’re well within your rights to do so.
it’d be a terrifying gamble for him to take and one he doesn’t know if he’d be prepared to take. would he able to set aside his pride just for the chance of you back in his arms, willingly and wholly?
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ngl crocodile looked ugly af in the anime during the early parts of the alabasta arc but i still ended up thirsting for him when i first watched it 🤨
