“Jensen…” Cougar growled. The furrow in his brows meant that he wanted Jensen to quickly and quietly put his foot down and move away from his feet and never touch his feet ever again, bare or otherwise.
Naturally Jensen moved onto the next piggie and wiggled Cougar’s toe, eliciting a shudder from Cougar before he tensed up again.
Jensen grinned. Finding out Cougar was ticklish was the best thing that ever happened in his life, and not just because he won a bet with Aisha. Now he got to use it to his advantage whenever he wanted* (*whenever Cougar allowed him to).
Apparently today was one of those days because Cougar gritted his teeth and allowed Jensen to wiggle each of his toes individually, watching him intently with hands clenched into fists at his side.
Jensen grinned and braced himself as he swiped his thumb across the bottom of Cougar’s foot. Like he predicted, Cougar jumped, foot intending to kick Jensen - mostly out of reflex. But Jensen was prepared and caught his foot before rubbing his thumb into his foot, harder this time.
Cougar groaned.
“Jensen…” This time Cougar’s brows were raised slightly. Now was not the time for that, which Jensen knew, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t give his lover a foot massage in the middle of the room… where their team members were watching in dismay and confusion after Jensen had played “this little piggie” on the toes of their deadly sniper. Some things simply couldn’t be explained.
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Anonymous said:Can I request protective Cougar? There's nothing I love more than Cougar sticking up for/protecting Jensen.
"Holy hot pockets! I-" Jensen reigned in his exclamation when he realized how the entire team's attention was instantly on him, all confused and concerned. "I... am going to go get my wallet from the van because I forgot it there, like an idiot. Be right back guys, don't wait up, order a round on me."
Jensen had successfully turned around and pointed himself in the direction of the exit when he felt a firm tap on his arm. He looked down to see his own traitorous wallet being tapped against him by none other than a silent, smirking Cougar. A Cougar with a very serious look that froze Jensen in place.
"Oh, um... thanks Cougs. Must have uh- totally blanked there."
"Okay Jen, what's up? You're acting weirder than usual," Pooch and the others were forming a semi-circle around him and it was making him all sorts of uncomfortable considering the attention this could bring.
"Nothing, nothing man I swear! Let's just get to a table. How about this one right over there. In the back!"
Cougar narrowed his eyes at Jensen and the hacker cursed himself immediately because if anyone could pick up on the rushed, subtle glances Jensen was shooting across the bar... it was their faithful sniper.
He turned his head in the direction and zeroed in on exactly who Jensen had been trying to avoid.
"Quién es ese?" Cougar asked and Jensen cringed because the entire team turned to look at the guy.
It was the last person Jensen ever wanted to see again. It was the person he would do anything for. It was the person who made Jensen feel like he was flying while simultaneously making him feel worthless. It was Jensen's ex.
"No one. Stop- stop looking! Can we just get really really drunk right now and ignore the person and seriously stop looking he'll notice." Jensen was pushing them all toward a table now and some went willingly - Aisha had already sat down of her own accord - but they were all staring at Jensen's ex... and Cougar would not be moved.
He eyed up Jensen like he was taking vitals of him before glancing back over at Jensen's ex.
Jensen finally sighed because everyone else was seated and he knew the only thing that would get Cougs to move was to tell the truth. "He's my ex. He sorta... broke my heart and I don't want to see him, okay Cougs? Let's sit down and drink and I'll forget about everything alright?"
Cougar's eyes narrowed and Jensen wasn't sure if he was glaring at him or Jeff but Cougs eventually nodded and moved to the table. Jensen exhaled loudly, throwing his head back and sending one last glance over at Jeff before sitting down next to the sniper.
It should have been smooth sailing from there.
It wasn't.
Sometime after round two and before round five, Jensen had gotten up to get their next round but before he could make it back from the bar, there was a firm grip on his shoulder and hot breath on his ear.
"Why Jake Jensen, I thought that was you."
Jensen swallowed audibly and tried to keep his voice as level as possible as he stared at the bartender in front of him. "Jeff. Hey what's up?"
"Knew it was me just from my voice huh?"
Jensen leaned away from the lips that were brushing against his ear and turned to face Jeff with the most convincing smile he could muster. "Did you want something, Jeff?"
Jeff rose a brow and gave Jensen the once-over, "Thought that was obvious Jay."
Jensen gritted his teeth and tried to focus on saying no because everything in his stupid body was screaming yes. He wanted this, wanted Jeff, wanted to feel his hands on his body again, wanted to grab that little sliver of happiness before it all went to hell as it inevitably would.
"I'm sorta busy, Jeff. Maybe another time." That should suffice. It wasn't exactly a no but it would save him for the time being.
"I'm sure your buddies back at your table won't miss you," Jeff stepped closer, wrapping an arm around Jensen's waist. "Come on, I'll make you feel good."
He started to pull and Jensen's heels thankfully dug into the floor. At least one part of his body wasn't going to be an idiot in Jeff's presence. "Look man, not tonight."
"Jay, you're going to come home with me," Jeff whispered against Jensen's neck, making him shiver. "You always do. You can't change that."
"I can," Cougar growled.
Jensen hadn't noticed the sniper walk up to them but he was standing directly in front of Jeff, blocking his path and scowling at the man from under the brim of his hat.
"Who the fuck are you?"
"Cougs, man, it's okay. I got this," Jensen warded him off but Cougar didn't back down. His eyes remained fixed on Jensen's ex.
Jeff, however, laughed and pulled Jensen tighter against his body. "This your new squeeze, Jay? You get that lonely and desperate when I'm not around to take care of you? Come on, I'll make you remember what a real man feels like."
They moved forward together, Jensen being tugged along with Jeff but Cougar lifted one of his hands and pressed it against Jeff's chest, holding him in place.
"Fuck! What the hell is your problem?"
Cougar simply glared at him, "He said no."
Jensen couldn't help but smile at Cougar. For once he felt assured he wasn't going to wake up in the morning hating himself because he fell for Jeff's bullshit once again and thought Oh it'll be different this time. Because it never was. It was always the same. And it always sucked.
"Seriously?" Jeff hissed, glaring at Jensen's smile like it had done something to personally offend him. "This guy? You're actually with this guy?"
Jensen's gaze flitted over to the sniper and he was pleasantly surprised to see Cougar looking back with that half-smirk he had grown so fond of.
"Fuck this."
Jeff had made the biggest mistake of his life. He swung at Cougar and actually managed to land a hit on the sniper's face. He didn't get another hit in after that, however, because Cougar had lunged at him and had him pinned against the bar. Jeff struggled under the sniper's hold, rocking his head back hard to smack Cougar in the face before Cougar pressed Jeff's head down hard onto the counter.
Of course now they had the attention of everyone in the bar, especially the bartenders and the bouncers, who were now standing by, ready to pry Cougar off of Jeff. Except Jensen got their first.
"Woah! Woah Cougs! Ease up!" Jensen gripped Cougar's shoulder, squeezing it gently before Cougar nodded and stepped back. Jeff fell against the bar, breathing rapidly and when he turned around Jensen was there to hold him back when he threw a glare at the sniper. "Go home, Jeff. Get out of here and break someone else's heart because we're done. I'm done with you. With this fucked up thing. It's over."
Jeff scowled, pushing Jensen away from him before shouting at the rest of the patrons in the bar. "The fuck are you lookin' at, huh?"
"Okay buddy, that's enough." One of the bouncers said, now targeting him as the problem and leaving Cougar and Jensen so he and the others could make sure Jeff left the bar without causing any more trouble.
"And you," Jensen turned to Cougar who looked like he was going to head back to the table with the rest of the Losers. Cougar turned around, tilting his head at the hacker questioningly. "That was incredibly hot and I am very turned on right now!"
Jensen all but threw himself at the sniper, ducking his head under that gorgeous hat so he could press his lips firmly, and a little sloppily, against Cougar's.
Cougar, thankfully, kissed Jensen back just as eagerly. He wrapped his arms around the hacker and pulled him in close. It was possibly the most intense kiss Jensen had ever had in public... or ever. There was a lot of pushing and tugging at Cougar's hair and he was definitely sure those were Cougar's moans against his lips whenever he did that.
Jensen sighed against Cougar's lips, wrapping his arms around his shoulders in a loose grip. The kiss eased up into short, chaste pecks and lingering touching of lips but neither of them wanted to stop kissing the other. At least until the applauds made Jensen jump up from under Cougar's hat.
The entire bar was applauding them, some whistling, some holding their beers up in cheers. Jensen laughed, not caring about the blush that settled over his cheeks as he took a few bows.
Cougar, however, tilted his hat to cover his face and took Jensen by the hand. Jensen half expected them to sit back down at their table but when Jensen found Cougar pulling him right past the table of laughing and clapping Losers, Jensen waved goodbye to their team and grinned at the promises of what Cougar's plans were outside of the bar.
syciaralynx said: For Cougsen, dysfunctional clothing! Belts getting stuck, zippers breaking, general clothing mahem, aka, “I am literally stuck in these pants.”
Mission sex was possibly the most complicated sex Cougar and Jensen had. Save for that one time Jensen wore a bondage suit. Sex during a mission had to be quick, it had to be quiet, and it had to be perfectly timed - as they learned from that time Jensen got shot in the ass.
They had some downtime during the mission where the two had to hang back while Clay and Aishi infiltrated building as a newly wed couple with Pooch as their getaway driver. Jensen was meant to be keeping an eye on the security cameras - which he was... he just had a Cougar very eagerly sucking on his neck and he had to deal with that situation promptly.
"Shit Cougs, make it quick!"
Cougar grunted, tugging at Jensen's layers to get his gear and jacket off because they could afford to lose some clothing at the moment. They weren't in that much of a rush and Jensen wouldn't be vulnerable without bullet proof gear and guns at the ready.
Jensen rolled his head back, relaxing in his chair, as Cougar continued to kiss and nip at him while pushing his clothes off his shoulders. He loved it when Cougar was this eager. It wasn't as if Cougar wasn't an attentive lover, he was the most attentive lover. Completely focused on Jensen and the task at hand and Jensen was often too blissed out to move by the end. But Cougar also liked to take his time. He liked to tease Jensen until he couldn't stand it anymore. Moments like this, there was no waiting, there was no teasing, there was only the need to get Jensen to come as quickly as possible and Jensen was not mad about that.
While Cougar occupied himself with Jensen's upper layers and all the firearms he had on his person, Jensen decided to help the process out by unbuckling his pants. Except the buckle wasn't unbuckling like it was meant to. It took him several more minutes to get the damn thing unstuck and by that time, Cougar was kneeling impatiently between his open legs, hands on his thighs.
"Got it, Cougs. Let's do this."
Only the universe hated Jensen and when Jensen's fingers moved to unzip his pants, he felt the damn thing snag on his boxers. He tugged and pulled and alternated between carefully pulling the fabric and trying to rip the zipper off until it became clear that it wasn't going to budge.
"I am literally stuck in these pants." Jensen groaned, letting his head fall back. "Cougs help me out please."
He felt Cougar's hands on his, pushing his fingers out of the way, but before the sniper had a chance to fix the mayhem of Jensen's pants... Clay's voice came over the comm.
"Wrap it up Losers, we're going in." In was like he knew... but then, Clay always knew.
"Noooo!"
Cougar chuckled, patting Jensen on the thighs as he stood up and picked up his gear.
"Wait, Cougs I'm still stuck. Cougar don't you walk out that door. I'm half naked and my zipper is stuck in my underwear! Cougs!"
Jensen, like any sane human person, ate peanut butter straight out of the jar, put peanut butter on English muffins and bread and bagels and crackers and cucumbers when people forced him to be healthier. It was normal (for those who didn't have an allergy to the stuff). It was delicious. It was what he loved most - next to his high maintenance sniper that did. not. like. peanut butter.
Cougar hated the stuff. He turned up his nose in the most prissy fashion Jensen had ever seen. He scowled from underneath the brim of his hat and turned on his heel to exit the kitchen every single time Jensen made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or got up off the couch when Jensen sat down with his jar of peanut butter ready to stuff his face with spoonfuls of delicious.
Which, of course, made Jensen want to understand why Cougar hated peanut butter... by constantly eating it around him.
Jensen made it a point to always have peanut butter no matter where the team went. He started carrying around tiny jars in his pack or jacket or pants on missions - next to the tubes of lube he carried because Jensen was nothing if not prepared.
Cougar showed his teeth in the most vicious of expressions any time Jensen offered him some peanut butter. And no matter how many times Jensen asked why he didn't like peanut butter, Cougar never gave him an answer. He knew the sniper wasn't allergic to it, it would have been in his files that Jensen totally didn't hack into - the day he was propositioned for a place in the Losers team.
It wasn't until Jensen leaned in for a kiss from his boyfriend that this peanut butter aversion because a problem for Jensen. Cougar held Jensen back with a hand on his chest, scrunched up his nose, leaned away from Jensen's lips and said, "Gross," before walking away.
"Woah, Cougs! Come on, don't leave a guy hanging!" Jensen chased after his boyfriend, at the time not sure why Cougar wasn't kissing him after they survived a rather difficult mission - with lots of explosions and a bullet almost in Pooch's shoulder - luckily it was just a graze. "Why no kisses?"
Cougar turned around, raising his eyebrow at the hacker like he should know why.
"Lip touching is a necessary when we win!"
"You smell gross." Was Cougar's clipped answer.
Immediately Jensen lifted his armpit and took a whiff and... he wasn't wrong. But Jensen worked up a sweat during missions all the time and that never stopped them from kissing after a mission before.
"Your breath."
Jensen frowned, lifting his hand to his mouth and breathing out. Peanut butter. He was eating it during missions now, out of his mini-personal stashes. He'd never done that before.
"It's just peanut butter! It's delicious! Why do you hate it?"
Cougar shrugged one of his shoulders and started to walk back to the rest of the team.
"You can't just not like peanut butter for no reason, Cougs! It's unnatural! You have to be allergic to not like peanut butter! You're so weird! Cougs, come back please."
Cougar had reached the team, knocking knuckles with Pooch at their success by the time Jensen finally started to catch up.
"If I brush my teeth will you make out with me?"
Pooch shook his head, "I don't want to know."
"He won't make out with me because I have peanut butter breath." Jensen folded his arms, pout prominent on his face when he sidled up to Cougar... who quickly stepped away from him.
"Guess this is our lucky break," Clay grinned, clapping Jensen on the shoulder. He continued to explain when Jensen furrowed his brows at him in confusion. "Extraction team isn't coming. Might be a while before we get toothpaste again."
Jensen's face immediately fell. "No."
He actually heard Cougar snicker under his breath.
"You! This affects you, too, y'know!"
Cougar shrugged once again, "I can wait."
"Not fair, man. Life officially sucks... and I ran out of peanut butter..." Jensen grumbled, following the team as they laughed their way to finding Pooch a vehicle to steal.
Anonymous said: Now I'm thinking about Cougar/Jensen, with Jensen bringing home a kid for whatever reasons, the kid gets to wear The Hat because Cougs turns out to be a total pushover and Jensen to everyone's surprise ends up being the responsible one. I blame you. [I happily accept this blame]
Jensen frowned as he walked in the door to find the hat of his lover not on his lover's head.
"Hey! Why does she get to wear the hat?" Jensen pointed accusingly at his niece who was absorbed in the video games that Jensen had set up for her and Cougar before he left to get them all take out. He left his precious niece in the care of his boyfriend in order to get them all sustenance, and this is how he was repaid for his trouble. Mutiny. Betrayal.
Cougar shrugged, pressing a few buttons on the controller and taking out a few enemies to allow Becky to complete the mission objective by throwing the serving the volleyball and setting the net on fire . "She deserved it."
"For what?"
"I took down a Buzzard all by myself!" Becky announced proudly, peeking at Jensen from under the rim of the hat. She was surprised she could still see the television from how large the hat was for her.
Jensen pouted, "And I don't deserve the hat? I got the food. And last night I- I... um," the hacker cut himself off, throwing a worried glance at Becky who was now focused solely on the game again. "I thought I performed admirably last night."
"You did." Cougar agreed with a nod. "But it was not hat-worthy."
Jensen's jaw dropped with an audible and offended gasp. "But I- you- this is not fair." He pouted once again, unable to make his case for why his actions were hat-worthy when his niece was right there in the room with them, all innocent ears.
Cougar simply smirked as they drove into a safe zone in the game to collect the mission reward and save. "Food, Jensen."
"Nope. I don't think you deserve food. Sorry. All for me- and Becky because she's a child and I can't neglect her but I can neglect you all I want. You, my dear sniper, will get your own food." Jensen rambled as he set up their food at the kitchen table, Becky reaching for hers eagerly and Cougar only getting up to pluck his hat off Becky's head. She didn't seem upset by this, as she was able to see her food and where she was going more easily without the hindrance of the hat.
Cougar sidled up to Jensen as the hacker unpacked the food. He slipped his hands around Cougar's waist and rested his chin on Jensen's shoulder. The hacker did everything to ignore him. Focused on the food as he loaded only his onto a plate, didn't even take out another plate for Cougar.
"Jensen," Cougar all but purred.
"Uh uh uh, not in front of the kid."
"Uncle Jake, don't be mad at Cougar," Becky called from the living room but she didn't seem all that concerned. She knew her uncle wasn't actually mad, he was just sulking.
"Cougar knows what he did wrong, and he can get some food when he apologizes."
He felt Cougar grin against his neck, his lips trailing up until he could feel Cougar's hot breath on his ear. Jensen nearly fell over when Cougar started whispering in Spanish next to his ear, low and private so Becky couldn't hear. Not that she'd understand it. Hell, Jensen didn't really understand everything but he recognized a few key words that... spoke highly of Jensen's actions the previous night. He always loved it when Cougar's dirty talk was also a puzzle for him to solve.
"Okay fine! You can have food just stop... getting me worked up," Jensen hissed in a low whisper.
Cougar smirked, stepping away from Jensen and picking up the plate Jensen had been putting together.
"Oh hey not fair! That's just-" Jensen paused, startled at the hat that was suddenly placed on his head and was shortly followed by a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth.
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Anonymous said: May I prompt some Cougar/Jensen cuddling?
"Mmm... this is nice Coug," Jensen practically purred against Cougar's next, nuzzling his face closer into the crook of his boyfriend's neck.
Cougar made a short noise of agreement, pulling Jensen in with the arm he had wrapped around the hacker's shoulders.
"Relaxing," Cougar nodded, pressing his lips to Jensen's forehead.
"And then we could do the sex after. Or before and end with the cuddles instead of falling asleep in various states of undress, oh my."
Cougar rolled his eyes at the reference but didn't object to the ideas Jake was putting forward. They were solid ideas, something they needed to keep them stable in this crazy job where they nearly got themselves killed on a daily basis.
"Cougar, Jensen. Now is not the time," Clay stated from the front seat of the van they were stationed in.
Pooch was tapping his fingers against the steering wheel impatiently, "While you guys are sickeningly cute, and I do mean sickening, I could heave right out the window right now if we weren't on a job. Can you two please, please wait until Aishi gets back from 'negotiating' before you get all lovey-dovey. Even, and I know this might seem crazy, wait until we're all in separate hotel rooms so we don't all have to share the love?"
Jensen and Cougar mulled this over before Cougar tipped his hat, "Sex later."
Jensen pouted, tugging at Cougar's shirt. Cougar chuckled, petting Jensen's back, "Cuddling does not stop."
Jensen smiled happily, snuggling back into Cougar's embrace, Pooch let his head drop onto the steering wheel in defeat and Clay, well Clay put up with a lot and he was thankful he didn't have to see Jensen's naked ass one more time this month.
Cougar/Jensen - College AU (Because I couldn't think of anything else because I'm boring)
(God you’re so lame Gaz why do you even come here?)
Once again the two found themselves tangled on Cougar’s bed after classes had ended due to Jensen’s inability to recognize personal boundaries. Cougar sat with his back against the headboard and Jensen laying across his lap on his stomach, Cougar’s textbook resting on the young hacker’s back to keep him still in hopes that he would also concentrate on his own textbook in front of him. Never worked though because the entire time Jensen would be listing off random facts that Cougar wasn’t even sure how they related back to computer science until he gave up and took the book from him, giving him a better use for his mouth in the process.
