#contradiction.

Lane Boy

Aww.... These two are so sweet! While my brother and I....

I don't think I've actually written a post in a while. I don't have much to say at the moment, or ever. Not that I don't have things on my mind, I just don't like to talk about things. I don't know why I'm like this, or if its a bad thing. I guess it is sometimes because i would probably be bored with somebody if they never have much to say. I usually stick to the same topics to talk about. I don't go into too much detail either, maybe because I'm worried ill sound like a dick if I say something that doesn't make sense. It's kind of stange because I can seriously over analyze things, people, ideas, and discussions I've had or want to have but when time comes for me to divulge anything I draw a blank. Its a weird combination of not trusting people, self consciousness and just liking my privacy. There's a few people I trust completely and even then I don't go in depth with much. With only one relationship I totally let go, surprisingly not with a guy I was with for 3 years. I guess it was intuition telling my or to trust him with my whole heart. This guy I was close with years back, and we were together for almost 2 months and I was so comfortable with him. I didn't feel stupid, or self conscious, or like what I have to say wasn't irrelevant to the world. For a while I thought I would stay that way but when we stopped talking again I kind of just was back to the closed of girl. There's something about being intimate with somebody that kind of makes you feel obligated or more so complacent with disclosing information about yourself, or just any topic in general. But for me it's very rare to easily open up like that even to my closest friend who know more about me then my own family. There's really no point to all this, it was just a topic on my mind. Well maybe there is, I can write a stupid post with more ease then explaining myself in person. I'm not antisocial or anything, in fact I can be quite loud and talkative, just not about certain topics or about anything other then a superficial conversation. Soooo yeah, I also have really sucky grammar when not in school, even then it's not great. Ill end this oddly long post about not being talkative -.- I confuse myself sometime lol I wonder sometimes am I the only weirdo like this? Goodnight // Goodmorning Tumblr! ❤💬