#considerations

To prepare to get into my young self personality, I had ti read A LOT of old material (which yeah, I still have because nothing gets thrown away because they're all lil milestones) and... I got the picture of someone who grew up in a fucked up society where the internet was still something raw and unfiltered that, instead of helping you, fed you the worst shit ever.

I was homophobic, fatphobic, racist, and the worst thing is I didn't realize I was. I just imitated what other people and TV told me.

I would say "I am not gay!!!" But then write yaoi shit all around. That HP thing had pretty ironic and bad racist remarks and but I SWEAR I was trying hard to do some social commentary. I just did them wrong.

Glorification of drugs, prostitution, s/h and death masked as "no I swear they are wrong!!!1!!1!1!2!!2!1", made just to feel stronger feelings as I made them. Or because they were KOOL!!! The 2000s was kinda the years were this stuff was glorified even in music videos, after all.

The darker the story, the cooler it was, or something like that. And the protagonist had to be isolated and miserable and alone and depressed forever. JuSt LiKe Me!1!1!1!

I still remember when this changed.

I was lying in bed, imagining the next dark drug dead s/h shameless shit, and I had the protagonist die. Everyone was dead. No one was left.

I remember staring ad darkness and thinking "... now what? I can't do anything anymore with it. It's over."

So I went back and saved everyone.

I left hate and pity back. I had them help each other and find hope and go on.

And I loved it.

It gave me a rush of energy like none of those dark stories gave me.

I started moving on.

There was still dark and heavy themes, but they all ended up getting resolved, one way or another, and people still had smiles!

And people liked my stories more?! I think it's because people invent sad stories to exorcise demons, but then search for hopeful stories to run away from their already hard life! Some chose fiction to not think about their problems!

I wanna be that kind of author that takes your hand and shields you from problems, even for a few pages!

It took 20 years and a lot of try and error to understand this, but I am glad I did!

And going back 20 years... I did a lot of bad things and mistakes... but if I could, I would hug that scared 16 years old and reassure her that "we'll be ok. We'll make it. We're still alive. It's not perfect, but we're smiling and going on. On our own."

Everyone can be better if they only REALLY want to change for themselves. Changing is a selfish act. One we should embrace! 💕

i'm not here to define or diagnose therians as a group of delulu people who think they're animals for whatever reasons, but i did want to address the idea that being a therian is a tad... questionable, isn't it?

by no means is this to shut down or discourage those who identify as therian, if this is something you find personally valuable, by all means continue to do so

however, in an era where nobody feels like they really belong, is therian another symptom of that? is it a self made illusion built upon the grounds of wanting to justify our differences in order to then justify our existence?

it's possible. in fact it may be probable. however, i more so want to touch upon the distinctions that make someone a therian in the eyes of a general community

i don't know if everyone's seen the same thing, but there are art pieces that describe the therian experience that i find questionable. many depicting ideas that aren't even uniquely therian like preferring to be in nature or having animalistic traits

broad and vague as that is, it's true, in fact we as humans or beings inhabiting a human shell are not really in our natural world and we haven't been for a while. there's a reason nature calms us, and a reason we may prefer being around animals

we live in a society of flawed languages, imperfect communication, difficult with lives in a way we weren't designed to live and a lack of inner peace that requires we step outside of that life

in that respect, therian, at least from an outside perspective, seems like it's there to justify flaws we don't actually have for the purpose of finding our inner peace or community

the idea of phantom limbs also isn't an abstract concept, considering many transgender people also fall under this. however this begs the question... would that make therianism a realisation of self, or a desire?

that's not to say that's the same for trans people, make no mistake, only you can define who you are. however, the desire for alterations and a different body is a desire

so it begs the question if a phantom sensation of body is what is missing or what is desired

thinking about what animals do. one behaviour animals partake in commonly is called somatic shaking, this is something humans can do, however due to our modern day world, self perception and self awareness... we do not have the luxury of simply behaving ferally in public or nature

it would be cringe, embarrassing, worrisome, strange, and attract unwanted attention that suggests you conform or face consequences

in essence... perhaps there's a desire for functional freedom

freedom, and inner peace

and so what is my point with this?

well, in essence, i do think therians should take a long hard look in the mirror and also consider the falsehoods that are associated with therianism but are perfectly normal

but secondly, i believe that therianism could be a reflection of our modern day world and desire not to simply condition ourselves to behave according to a specific set of rules and societal norms that suggest what it means to be a human

because although therians may see themselves as animals, the truth is, that could be because many of us forget that humans are also animals and yet we're ashamed to act in our own unique ways with acceptance and open-mindedness

a return to nature and desire for a lack of binding rules and more freedoms like the value of a tail or enhanced sensory values may be a result moreso of our flawed system and society

Witches

You can't automatically put witches or witchcraft in the 12th house. I see some astrologers do that and I think it's an issue of not understanding the principals and adopting what they see in the ancient books without critical thought. The traditional sources would have witches in the 12th because it's the house of the bad daimon, which can show hidden enemies and spiritual attacks. William Lilly, for example, would look at it in horary astrology if the querent believed they had been bewitched or something of the sort. But witchcraft isn't always about hexing someone. If I had to put witchcraft in a house it would be the 3rd, the Goddess, as a magical/spiritual/religious practice. If you're a witch yourself you'll be looking at the 12th to see your hidden enemies, not yourself or your practice, you have no power in the 12th. And if you're actually hexing people, you'll look for them and that practice in the 6th.

The problem here is not thinking through why something was said and why things are assigned to the houses that they are. The houses are supposed to be understood in trios, the four angular triads. The 1st, the 2nd and the 12th form the first angular triad, with an angular, a succedent and a cadent house. Angular houses are where there's action, it's a turning point, where planets have power and can do things. Succedent houses are not yet angular, they represent things that support the angle. Cadent houses are about losing the power of the angle, it's where things fall, get slow and have no power. The 1st is the angle of the ascendant, the place in the sky where things were rising at the time of birth, so it represents the native themselves, who was also just rising in the world, and the basic rule is as above so it is below. The succedent house from it (the 2nd) is about what comes to the native, things that support it, and all succedent houses have a lot to do with material things. The cadent place from the native is the 12th, where the native falls, where they lose power or control, where they can be at the mercy of others. So, the 6th will be the 7th's cadent, the other's fall, where the other loses power, that's why we see there the signification of slaves or servants and small domesticated animals in the ancient sources. And generally, someone who got hexed by you is subjugated in a sense that fits best the symbolism of the 6th house of bad fortune.