Try Harder Cause I'll Walk Away
He never minded chasing after others. There was this insatiable hunger deep down to see the best of those around him. Convincing himself that the past could be forgotten and forgiveness didn’t need to be vocally expressed through an exchange, Midoriya remained in a constant state of happiness. That’s what Class A only ever saw from him.
There were times he’d be frustrated, sad, or have some muted form of an attitude, but most of the time it wasn’t directed at anyone in particular unless it was a villain.
Midoriya had a cloud of energy around him. Depending on how someone needed to be recharged, the cloud would shift into a comfortable calmness or bloom from excited ramblings about the hero world or something interesting that happened.
After the back to back tidal waves known as the Paranormal Liberation War and the Final War, the stillness of life was heavy.
As Midoriya laid in the hospital bed, Toshinori’s heart monitor steadily beeped. It was the only sound in the entire room that brought him some comfort. Thanks to Eri’s quirk, many of the initial injuries Midoriya acquired in the war were gone. Still, everything that happened after his arms were blasted off were still painful and showed no signs of healing soon.
Visitors were scarce. It makes sense considering many of his classmates and fellow heroes were also recovering in the hospital, placed on bed rest. Still, the sudden absence of seven loud voices he’d grown used to hurt more than it should have. There was a small flicker of what was left of One for All and the clock was ticking of what he had left vanishing.
When All Might arose, Midoriya wore a sad smile, feeling the weight of heroism still on his shoulders even in the aftermath of a victory. They shared long conversations about the future and what their plans were. When they healed enough to move around, Midoriya spoke with Spinner. Despite Spinner having his entire body held between two large hands, Midoriya made sure his message was clear.
Tenko Shimura didn’t die in vain and Tomura Shigaraki died with a smile.
Upon classes resuming, Midoriya did his best to smile and maintain the same bubbly personality he had before… but he couldn’t fool himself. It seemed it didn’t take his classmates much convincing he was fine. If anything, they seemed to dodge him a bit. For what reason he didn’t know, but he did have a heart to heart with Uraraka eventually. It seemed to reunite the class’ bond a bit, but Midoriya could feel that hollowness continue to grow as the days passed.
A lot was left unsaid and Midoriya went to the one person he felt most comfortable with for his dilemma. The dorm was average sized and homey. A couple of cats rushed around to sniff his shoes and he slipped them off in the genkan.
“What seems to be the matter, Midoriya,” asked Aizawa gruffly, guiding Midoriya to the open living area.
“I don’t know what I want to do with my life,” admitted Midoriya quietly, eyes watching the way Aizawa’s pink sweatpants got caught under the fronts of his black slippers.
The feet he was intentionally watching came to a stop before slowly turning until they pointed back at him. Too scared to trail his glance back up to the man that was most definitely looking at him, Midoriya blinked harshly.
A hand reached its way over to rest on Midoriya’s shoulder. “Okay kid. How about I get you something to drink and we talk about this on the couch?”
Stiffly nodding, Midoriya tore his eyes away from where they’d been burning a hole into black fabric and up to the face that wore an expression Midoriya hadn’t seen in a long time. Aizawa’s hair was in its original part, allowing his scarred right eye to greet Midoriya. The eye patch covering the empty socket was a bit crooked from his eyebrows twisting in fondness. Aizawa stared at Midoriya with a tender stare and a warm smile. The exhaustion in his dark circles seemed to evaporate in the face of his patient observation.
The random meeting soon became weekly talk sessions in the cozy apartment. When Aizawa had away missions or business meeting with the hero public safety commission Hawks was busy rebuilding, Midoriya was the one who looked after Aizawa’s cat and watered the plants Eri had grabbed for him.
By the time graduation came around, Midoriya had some form of a game plan. With the recent loss of One for All and his full return to being quirkless, he worked with Toshinori to pursue the life he wanted. Deciding to work with David and Melissa Shield, Midoriya planned to move to America. Toshinori would travel with Midoriya, finding it to be a soul searching idea considering their extremely recent quirkless status.
Just like that, Midoriya packed up his life into two suitcases and hopped on a flight to a different country. Inko chose to stay back, not too comfortable with a giant change such as moving. She also didn’t want to become completely dependent on her son, which would most likely occur.
So life moved on. Izuku was accepted into an online Japanese college for Biology. While he pursued his Bachelors, he also developed hero gear and suits with Melissa Shield in his free time. Eventually when his English got good enough, he started doing public appearances, interviews, and even did some modeling gigs.
Through it all, Toshinori was right by his side, asking how Midoriya’s day was and dragging him out all over the city. They accepted and embraced their life free of All for One and the sudden endless paths they could take. David and Toshinori rekindled their friendship, not having talked too much after the incident with Wolfram and the quirk amplification device.
Yet, as much as Midoriya cherished his time experiencing life in America, he knew he’d return to Japan. He missed his mother, Aizawa, and the kids. While he occasionally talked with Bakugo, Todoroki, Uraraka, and Iida, it wasn’t as often as he would’ve thought back when he was sixteen.
Getting a driver's license in America before Japan, getting a tongue piercing at eighteen, celebrating his twenty-first birthday in an American bar with Melissa and her group of friends, and finding out he had an “I am here!” tramp stamp right above his ass after a crazy night out were just some of things he experienced.
Midoriya discovered he loved cooking, speed skating, and eating wedding cake off of the floor with a random guy he got black out drunk with the week prior.
Returning to Japan for medical school was rather strange and rather empty. Still, the taste of his mother’s cooking and being surrounded by familiar faces after four years brought him a relief he was grateful to feel.
After visiting Aizawa upon his return, it was only then he got information about his classmates. Shortly after he moved to the USA, Kirishima and Kaminari proposed having an annual class reunion where everyone scheduled the same weekend off to meet. Mina eagerly latched onto the idea and immediately sent out specially made save the date cards.
When it came down to addresses, she asked a few people, wanting to keep the idea itself a surprise. When she got to Midoriya, she quickly turned her attention to her boyfriend. Kirishima admitted he wasn’t sure and noted he could ask Bakugo. When they ran into the blond after a patrol, Bakugo shrugged, mentioning the last he knew, Midoriya was still living with his mother.
It should have been alarming that it had been months since graduation and Bakugo didn’t visit in between shifts. Although, whose to say they didn’t see each other in public rather than in the privacy of their homes.
When an RSVP never came, Bakugo reached out to Midoriya on Mina’s behalf. Imagine his shock when Midoriya revealed he’d been living in America for over two months and had already told Bakugo this. Yet, Bakugo couldn’t remember ever being told Midoriya planned on moving nineteen hours by plane away.
The reunion felt empty with Midoriya’s absence, but they never sent him a text. The belief he’d fly back for a single dinner wasn’t strong enough.
Upon hearing that Class A had been having an annual class reunion and he wasn’t even graced with an invite stung. It didn’t matter what the reason for his lack of an invite was. A strong message was sent and he had no plans on telling anyone he was back. Call him petty. The occasional text was clearly more than enough for the five people that bothered keeping in touch.
Midoriya channeled all his energy into medical school. It was rather strange, but becoming a hero doctor was incredibly difficult. If Midoriya could compare it to anything else it was a mixture of training to become a surgeon, nurse, doctor, and an EMT all at the same time. It was stressful and caused many nights where he slept on a tear stained pillow, but he felt fulfilled.
With villains attacks being less frequent but no less dangerous, having a strong and young professional would be beneficial with Recovery Girl soon retiring. Nonetheless, Midoriya accepted he’d never compare to a hero with a healing quirk. But Midoriya was still thankful, Nezu confirmed he’d welcome Midoriya with open arms.
By now, Izuku was 23, in his third year of medical school. It was a nice experience being in the background while also being deeply respected. Teachers and classmates respected his space and were always fun to be around and talk with. There was no history of knowing him personally while he had One for All or the weight of the world on his hands. They talked about silly things like crushes, parties, annoying assignments, and anything else young adults would discuss.
Deciding to celebrate the new school year, Midoriya agreed to go out with a couple classmates. With the first week of clinical clerkships done and dusted, Midoriya was at an all time high. There was one bar that always gave discounts to first responders and medical care providers. The owners didn’t care that they were students so they often frequented.
Throwing on his jacket over his dark blue scrubs, Midoriya stepped out of his car. Many of his friends leapt out as well, excited to drink and relax after a stressful but fulfilling week. The bouncer grinned, winking at the group of medical students. Midoriya locked his car before approaching the woman. “Nice to see you doing well!”
“Likewise. I know you all are past twenty, but let me see those beautiful pictures,” chuckled the woman, hand extended.
Upon stepping inside, the energy was unmatched. It was a mixing pool of work uniforms, fancy outfits, and casual clothes. Quick to grab a table near the bar, everyone got their drinks of choice before throwing themselves down.
A loud burst of laughter came from a nearby table and Midoriya’s curiosity was piqued. Carefully turning around, he peeked at the group only to catch an eyeful of faces he hadn't seen in years. Aizawa’s words came rushing back for him in waves: the annual reunions he’d never been invited to. Quickly snapping his head forward, Midoriya squeezed his eyes closed before throwing back his entire beer in large rushed gulps.
Worriedly looking at their usually composed friend, one of his friends grabbed his hand. “What’s wrong?”
“Those people behind me. They are my classmates from UA. I found out when I returned to Japan that they’d been having annual reunions and never once had I been invited. Even after returning, appearing on billboards, and seeing almost everyone I knew, I still haven’t seen them until now. Seeing it for myself really is the final nail in the coffin,” rambled Midoriya, letting his fingers run through his messy green locks he desperately needed to trim.
“Go confront them. It’s better than letting all this resentment build. We will be right here and happily cover your bill. They may not value your presence, but we do. Fight this battle so we can celebrate our accomplishments!” cheered the young adult, her eye crinkling in a similar manner to his mothers.
Nodding, Midoriya rose from where he was sitting, hanging his jacket over the edge of the chair. Stalking over to the large table, his presence was immediately noticed. Eyes quickly widened, expressions brightened, and mouths dropped wide open. When there was no trace of a smile on Midoriya's face, a little pit formed in the group's gut.
“What a surprise to see everyone here,” greeted Midoriya smoothly, his tone unreadable.
“You’re back in Japan! When did that happen?” squealed Uraraka, fully turned around in her chair.
“Two years ago,” deadpanned Midoriya, no trace of a smile on his lips.
Blinking slowly, Todoroki tilted his head to the side, “Why didn’t you tell us? I’ve missed you so much.”
Raising an eyebrow, Midoriya crossed his arms in one heavy movement. “I didn’t think I had to tell you? In our texts I’ve quite literally said I was visiting Eri, eating at restaurants that only exist in Japan, and you know the name of the school I go to.”
The silence was heavy, Todoroki staring at his phone as if it had personally wounded him. “I’m sorry, Midoriya. I didn’t even realize.”
“I can see that,” answered Midoriya shortly, glancing around the table. “So what’s the occasion? Is this the annual class reunion Aizawa told me about?”
Faces paled as mouths wordlessly moved. As if six years wasn’t enough time to think about what they were doing, the realization was instant. Mina bowed her head. “I’m so sorry! I was responsible for handing out invites! I just assumed you were still in America. I didn’t send you an invite because I figured you wouldn’t want to fly over for a single dinner.”
Turning all his attention onto Mina, Midoriya smiled. The bitterness swirled in his gut and the lack of distance from the people he once cherished was far too overwhelming. “Oh, okay.”
Mina’s lip wobbled, eyes wet and puppy-like. Kirishima glanced over at Bakugo, something in his chest twisted and brought him sharp pain. “Midoriya, could we talk outside, please?”
Perking up, Midoriya slowly nodded his head. “Okay.”
Kirishima was quick to slide back his seat, approach Midoriya and guided him away. Midoriya looked at his group of friends and held up his hand in acknowledgment.
The moment the crisp night air greeted the duo, Kirishima was bowing before Midoriya, hands pressed against the ground. Blinking rapidly at the sudden display of shame, the dark cloud over his head suddenly vanished.
“I’m so sorry Midoriya,” Kirishima started.
Midoriya held up a hand, closing his eyes. “Wait a second. I’m going to grab my jacket and I’ll be right back.”
Stepping back inside, Midoriya scooped up his jacket, reassured his friends, and walked back outside. Kirishima stared off at the cars speeding down the road off in the distance. Midoriya wrapped his arms around his body. “Now, what are you apologizing for?”
“How shitty we’ve been to you. In all the chaos that our lives became, you’ve slipped through the cracks. You’re the last person we should have neglected. Even back in our final years at UA, I know I held this mentality that you had everything under control and nothing affected you. Yet, I’m an idiot for thinking that. Then when I came up with the idea of doing a reunion, Mina wanted to send out invites. We reached out to Bakugo for your address and he assumed you were still living with your mom. No one knew you moved to the states or what you were doing there? Then Mina chose not to send you an invitation and I didn’t interject. I didn’t bother reaching out or attempting to keep in touch. Only to find out you’ve been back in Japan for two years already. I’ve really failed you not only as a friend, but as a person,” expressed Kirishima, not once stuttering or taking his eyes away from Midoriya’s.
Unable to do anything else, Midoriya felt the pretty globs of water spill from his eyes. Biting his lip to hold back a sob, Midoriya let his head fall forwards.
“I’m so sorry. I know just how horrible of a place I was in after the war… I regret just assuming you were handling it with ease,” whispered Kirishima into Midoriya’s ear, quick to take Midoriya into a secure hug. He couldn’t stop the tears from spilling out as well. Guilt was one hell of an emotion, and Kirishima was drowning in it.
“Do you go to school nearby?” croaked Kirishima, pulling back from the hug to get an eyeful of a runny mess Midoriya’s face now was.
“Yeah, about fifteen minutes away from here. Although now I’m jumping from hospital to hospital every couple of weeks so… I don’t know,” sighed Midoriya, wiping his face with his fleece jacket sleeve.
Smiling, Kirishima pointed ahead of him. “Awesome! Me and Mina’s agency is ten minutes that way. If you’re not too busy, I’d love to make up for all the lost time. I’m such an asshole.”
Chuckling, Midoriya pulled out a single clean tissue from his pocket and extended it out. “Here. I’d like that. And… while you’ve definitely hurt my feelings to some degree I’m not too sure of myself, you’re not an asshole.”
Looking up at the night sky and wiping his face, Kirishima took in a long breath. “Are you a doctor, nurse, or…,” trailed off Kirishima.
Looking down at his scrubs, Midoriya grinned. “Hero doctor. I do pretty much everything. Right now, I’m still in medical school. I already graduated from college.”
“Nice! I must say, this is one of the best career paths you could’ve taken. Saving people and being your own kind of hero. I’m excited to see what you accomplish,” admitted Kirishima, flashing his shorter companion and a fond side glance.
“Thank you… how’s things with you and Mina?” questioned Midoriya, his shoulders falling as a genuine smile bloomed on his face.
Finally returning his full attention to Midoriya, Kirishima’s face bloomed pink. “Really good. I feel so lucky. We’ve been living together for four years now. Between you and me, I’m planning on proposing soon. I haven’t told anyone yet… honestly I don’t trust anyone to not tell.”
Zipping his lips, locking, and throwing away the fake key, Midoriya clasped his hands behind his back. “Well, your secret’s safe with me.”
Before Kirishima could respond, a low voice cut through the peace of the night.
“Ejiro, Mina is a mess right now,” stated Bakugo, walking to stand on the other side of Midoriya.
“Alright. Talk to you in a bit Midoriya,” voiced Kirishima, waving before returning inside.
Bakugo settled into a place beside Midoriya, appreciating just how beautiful Midoriya has become. It had been six years. Sure he saw the occasional post of public appearances right after he went to America, but he let his curiosity die in exchange for daily texts and the half-awake phone calls.
Yet here Midoriya was. His hair was messy and overgrown in the most beautiful display. His scars had faded, leaving slight discoloration and a lack of bottom lashes on his right eyelid. His face was more sculpted and his wide doe eyes appeared sharper. He was taller, and his muscles remained as lean as ever, bringing a pinch of relief to Bakugo.
“What was America like?” asked Bakugo quietly, staring at his feet after ripping his eyes away from freckled cheeks.
“It was wonderful. I enjoyed the people, food, and working with Melissa,” answered Midoriya thoughtfully.
Allowing his eyes to roam again, his hands tightened into fists. The vagueness accompanied by the briefness of Midoriya's response was slowly chipping away at all composure he could muster. He didn’t want to panic, but it was hard not to when his fuck up as so blatantly shoved into his face to acknowledge.
“How has medical school been? I’m assuming you just started a new semester,” started Bakugo, turning his body to face Midoriya’s.
“It’s been good. It keeps me busy. I just finished my first week,” answered Midoriya, turning to match Bakugo, meeting those burning red eyes with his own.
Sneering, Bakugo narrowed his eyes at the detached attitude he was receiving. “Why are you acting like this? Giving attitude to Uraraka, Todoroki, and Mina… now you're being weird to me.”
Not bothering to hide his surprise, Midoriya’s eyes widened as his mouth opened into a disbelieving smile. He tauntingly scoffed, “Really? You want to play that game? I told you I was moving to America back during your third year and now I’m finding out from Kirishima that you didn’t remember even when he asked you for my address for invites to a reunion I was never invited to for the past six years? No calls, no texts, no promise to hang out despite me asking you over the phone if you wanted to. No invites to hang out even though I tell you my plans. Why would I be excited to see you—especially when it’s during a class reunion I wasn’t invited to!”
“I’m busy and overworked Izuku! Why am I the bad guy?” shouted Bakugo. Deep down everything inside him was screaming to shut the fuck up, but old habits died hard.
Shaking his head slowly, Midoriya tilted his head up and laughed. “You know what? You’re right. You’re not the bad guy… you’re never the bad guy. Because god forbid I’ve been struggling and would appreciate the presence of someone I trust most in the entire world. But sure, you’re the one whose busy and overworked and it’s my fault for being upset you don’t care we haven’t seen each other in six years,” spat Midoriya, raising a hand to slowly wipe his right eye, his eyes burning from all the energy put into not crying
Biting his lip, Bakugo crashed to the ground, sitting on the street curb. Letting his arms balance on his knees, hands pathetically hanging. “I’m sorry. It’s just… I can’t tell you what’s been going on.”
“Why not?” fired Midoriya, sitting beside Bakugo, his nametag jingling from the harsh movements.
“It’s supposed to be a surprise,” sighed Bakugo, covering his face in his hands before aggressively rubbing.
Looking down at his scared and crooked hands, Midoriya balled them into fists. “That’s not good enough. If I’m honest, that nothing-burger of an explanation makes me want to punch you.”
Bakugo looked at his clasped hands and frowned. “And I don’t want to ruin it after all these years.”
“Who cares about a surprise? If you can’t tell, I’m mad at you. If you expected me to have a positive reaction to whatever surprise has taken you six years, then you’ll be sorely mistaken. You can take that surprise and shove it,” chastised Midoriya brutally, wanting another drink and a long nap rather than ever this horrible conversation was turning into.
“What do you want from me?” complained Bakugo, too inexperienced to understand healthy communication. No longer being able to understand or read Midoriya was a blaring on-the-nose problem that was beating Bakugo on the back of the head.
Slowly rising from where he was sitting, Midoriya shook his head, “I waited for you. To explain it... or— apologize! Or tell me that you loved me. I waited for you... for years! I wish I stayed home.”
Heart pounding in his chest, Bakugo grabbed Midoriya's ankle tightly in his hand. “I’m building you a hero suit! One that looks like yours, but can mechanically emulate your quirks. Since I overheard you were quirkless again… I spent every second of free time trying to get you back at my side, achieving that dream to become heroes.”
“I don’t need a hero suit, I need you! I needed you to come into my hospital room and cry with me! I needed you to see me off at the airport or to beg me to stay! I needed you to visit me or tell me when would be a good time to visit you! I needed you to listen during those phone calls. I needed you to pay attention to what was going on in my life. I wanted you to celebrate and be the first one to see me the moment I got off that plane. When I walked into this place, I needed you to jump onto the table and blast your way to me. But you did none of that… and you still haven’t shown me you actually care,” cried Midoriya.
His eyes were squeezed shut so tight it made no sense how there was a fountain of tears pouring down his face. His face was cheery red and his snot shined in the street lamp light. His hands shook at his sides and the emotions poured out of him in thick unrelenting waves.
Bakugo was quick to rush forward and envelop Midoriya, digging his face deep into soft, fluffy hair that still smelt like the lemon All Might shampoo and conditioner set he used since childhood. Midoriya sank into the familiar black shirt, breathing the fabric that held to cologne he remembered complimenting Bakugo in mid-second year.
“It’s been six years, but I’m a selfish idiot. I spent so much of my day thinking about you. It feels like we just graduated, walking through the halls with our diplomas. I’m sorry I neglected you. And I’m sorry I’m such a dumbass. It doesn’t erase my words, my absence, or my lack of engagement during our calls and texts. If I’m honest, by the time we called, your voice was putting me to sleep,” confessed Bakugo, his voice muffled from where it was buried.
“Why didn’t you just say that?” huffed Midoriya, slapping Bakugo’s back. Still, Midoriya made no effort to get away, surrendering into the strong arms.
“I don’t know. I guess I panicked and got defensive because why the hell would I act normally when it comes to you,” grumbled Bakugo, appreciating the empty streets.
Sighing, Midoriya pulled back. “You’re an asshole.”
Grabbing Midoriya’s hands and squeezing them tightly within his own, Bakugo sucked in a breath. “Are you free this weekend?”
“That depends,” hesitated Midoriya, his gaze focused on their interlocked hands. Despite the majority of him still fuming and wanting to beat the ever-loving-shit out of Bakugo, he couldn’t stop his heart from pounding and his stomach flipping in anticipation with all the butterflies making sure to reignite his long suppressed longing.
“You and me. Saturday morning, we go hiking and see the cherry blossoms. Grab some lunch after. And I give you a tour of my hero agency,” listed Bakugo smoothly, rubbing his thumb over Midoriya’s bumpy knuckles.
Flicking his eyes up to Bakugo, Midoriya received a punch to the gut, feeling all air escape him. There was an unseen vulnerability and desire written in Bakugo’s eyes and his lips just barely curving into a smile, fear written in his twitching hands.
“How about… we go hiking, see cherry blossoms, eat lunch, and I take you back to my dorm?” suggested Midoriya, offering his own nervous smile.
“Sounds like a plan. Do you have a DVD player?” questioned Bakugo, raising an eyebrow.
Nodding slowly, Midoriya grinned. “Yeah, my dorm is like an apartment so I got a mini living room. I have a DVD player and some consoles.”
“I’ll bring some movies,” revealed Bakugo, feeling a rush of confidence return to him.
“See, that wasn’t so hard now was it?” teased Midoriya, feeling a bit more like himself. Seeing a group approach in his peripherals, Midoriya looked toward the doorway. “Well, I think I’ve thoroughly freaked out my friends. I should get back to them.”
“Yeah, likewise… although I feel like I’m about to return to the shitshow of questions and cries of me to mend the wound on their behalf,” whinged Bakugo, letting his shoulder’s hunch over before letting go of Midoriya’s hand.
Shrugging, Midoriya fixed his face before approaching the door. “Let them figure it out themselves. You and Kirishima approached me directly and immediately announced you’d be making plans with me. They are more than capable of figuring that out themselves."
“I’m liking this attitude,” complimented Bakugo, walking beside Midoriya as they gave a curt nod to the bouncer.
Grinning, Midoriya rolled his eyes. Sucking in a deep breath, Bakugo grabbed Midoriya’s wrist once more. “Talk to you later?”
“Of course, who else will lull you to sleep,” breathed Midoriya, his gaze hungry despite his words being provoking.
“Ha. Ha. Very funny Freckles,” grumbled Bakugo, doing his best to fight the blush he knew was creeping up to his ears.
“I’ll talk to you later, Kacchan,” repeated Midoriya, turning away and walking to his table.
Bakugo was quick to return and much to his surprise, the group was far more focused on watching Midoriya than questioning Bakugo. Bakugo couldn’t help but join them.
The five adults all excitedly greeted Midoriya. One woman slid over a beer while the man next to Midoriya rubbed his back. Midoriya picked up the menu and immediately put all his focus back onto the other people wearing matching scrubs.
Bakugo paused, turning his attention away from Midoriya and back to the group. “How did I survive these past six years without him?”
While the group didn’t bother meeting the question with a response, Kirishima smiled at him.
