#compatibility test

MASTERLIST

Also on AO3.

~~~~

“You know what would be fun?” Leslie asked, sitting up and leaning on her pillow.

“What?” Ben replied, looking up from his novel.

“If we did that parental compatibility test thing that Ann and Chris did,” Leslie said as she leaned into Ben’s chest. “It’ll be fun to see how compatible we are, I mean, we’re already married so it’s not like it’s going to affect anything, right?”

A few days ago, Leslie had presented Ben with an empty family album that she made herself, ready to be filled with photos of their family. That night they talk briefly about Leslie coming off the pill to jumpstart their chances at getting pregnant and Leslie created a schedule that listed out all the potential evenings and mornings where they could have sex to try and conceive.

Then work distracted them, so all talks of having a baby were postponed for the time being, until tonight.

“Come on, let’s do it. It’s not that late, and it’ll be fun” Leslie bubbled happily.

Ben grinned at his wife. “Alright, go get my laptop and we’ll do it.”

Leslie was out of the door before Ben could finish his sentence.

~~

“Okay, I’m all finished” Ben said as he selected the answer to the final question.

“Me too” Leslie replied, excitedly chewing at her top lip.

“On the count of three we press enter, okay?” Ben said, and Leslie nodded.

“One.”

“Two.”

“Three.”

They both clicked enter, and the results popped up.

“Oh…62%”

“62…”

Leslie frowned. “That can’t be right. We are super compatible, this test is garbage! I mean we probably answered all the questions the same, what did you put for number 9?”

“The one about telling your children about mythical and magical things? I answered yes.”

Leslie nodded frantically. “Yes. Good. I put yes too. What about number 15?”

Ben thought hard, trying to remember the questions. “Was that the one about reporting them to the police if they did something bad?”

“Yeah.”

“I answered no.”

Leslie gawped.

“I answered yes…why would you not want to report our child for the defacement of the Lil Sebastian Memorial?” Leslie snapped.

“Because I’m afraid of cops and anything our child does we can discipline ourselves…wait, did you just make up a hypothetical situation for arresting our future child?” Ben asked with frown.

“Yeah, well that’s the only thing I could think of that would be bad enough to call the cops on my own child” Leslie explained.

She bolted out of bed, knocking her laptop over and started pacing the bedroom. “This is a disaster, Ben. We’re only 62% compatible. People like us should be getting 100%, this is not okay! How can we raise a child like this?”

Ben sighed, shifting his laptop to the side and reaching out for Leslie’s hand. “Hey, come here” He said kindly, taking her hand and managing to tug her back under the covers.

“Let’s not pay attention to some stupid online quiz,” Ben said, kissing the top of her head as he pulled her into his chest. “We could have scored 92% or 2%, it doesn’t matter. When we have a child it will be the most loved child in the entire world, no quiz can change my mind about that.”

Leslie nuzzled into his chest. “You’re right. I should have really stopped taking online tests after I got set up with Tom with online dating.”

Ben smirked, “You’ve taken loads of online tests then?”

MASTERLIST

a few days before taking the test