#chrose

9. Rosé/Denali | K. Stripper/Porn Star AU

yall know i had to set it in the poison paradise universe lol

-

“So, is this a voyeurism thing for you?” Denali asked as she adjusted her lighting, “or was this just out of curiosity to see how it compares to stripping?” 

Rosé shrugged as she straddled the desk chair on the other side of the setup, safely out of view but with the best seat in the house. “Do I really need a reason to wanna watch you fuck yourself on a dildo almost as long as my forearm? I think it would be much more offensive if I didn’t wanna take a peek."

Here's a prompt for you! Person A takes care of B's pet/s while they're on tour and they videocall to show that they haven't burnt their house down yet, with any ship that you'd like! (I was thinking Vandergerd while writing the prompt but idk how much *you* would wanna write for them so ssjfamfj)

lol ty for making that optional bcs this just screamed rosnali to me 💜

-

“Remember, no food after nine pm,” Denali reminded as he handed Rosé the five-page packet he’d typed up on everything he’d need to do to ensure the care of his apartment and much more importantly, his dog.

“What, is she a gremlin or something?” Rosé joked as he flipped through the pages. “Emergency con– in what universe is Willow Pill a solid emergency contact?”

He shrugged. “She lives the closest. Anyway, I’ll be back in a few weeks, humor me with FaceTime, okay, baby?”

His expression softened into a fond grin. “Of course, I promise everything’s in good hands,” he assured and kissed his cheek. “Now go finish packing, I wanna fuck you one last time before you go.”

Denali snorted with laughter. “So charming,” he teased, but did as he was told.

-

“Look, baby, Mommy’s calling,” Rosé cooed to Donut when he saw Denali was calling to FaceTime. “Hey! How’s the tour going?”

He grinned broadly upon seeing the two of them, though his heart ached with a sudden pang of homesickness. “Aw, look at you guys, so cute. The tour’s been fun. How’s everything here? Am I going to lose my security deposit? Do I need to send a welfare check?”

Rosé made a show of dramatically rolling his eyes. “Goddamn, have a little faith in me,” he huffed. “I’ve been adhering to your rule book just fine, I have a happy dog and a totally intact apartment. Relax.”

Denali pouted. “I know, I’m sorry. I just turn into a neurotic Jewish mother when it comes to her. I trust you, though. You’ve made a lot of progress in your life and I’m not gonna ignore that.”

“That’s better,” he teased to assure he hadn’t actually been more than mildly annoyed by his boyfriend’s constant concern. “Now go sleep, you look exhausted.”

“I will, I will, I’m just still on that post-show adrenaline rush.”

Rosé chuckled. “Next time I’m sending you on tour with a packet about how to care for yourself,” he playfully threatened before ending the call with “I love you, talk to you tomorrow.”

“Tell me to relax again and you’re on the couch for a month,” Denali snapped as she increased the incline on the treadmill.

Rosé sighed, “look, I know this competition is important to you, but–”

“No buts,” she cut in without missing a beat, “this is the make or break competition, Rosie. There’s no margin of error, period.”

She sighed, realizing she was not going to win this argument with her stubborn, stubborn girlfriend. But as she ran her fingers through her hair and shook her head, she relented, “just promise you’ll let me pamper you afterwards, okay?”

Rosé lifted her head from between Denali’s thighs, her brows furrowing. “Did you hear that?” 

Denali, more annoyed at the loss of contact than aware of the situation. “As if I was listening to anything,” she grumbled until she sat upright and heard what she must’ve been talking about. “I thought you said people wouldn’t start coming until four.”

She groaned and got up. “Fuck, Jan must’ve let them in.” Despite her girlfriend’s pout, she got up and started to put herself together. “Don’t just sit there,” she huffed, “they’re coming!”

“You better make this up to me later,” she muttered as she swung her legs over the side of the bed and grabbed the clothes she’d laid out for the night. “I’ve still yet to understand why you guys take your movie nights so seriously. I mean, it’s endearing and I’ve had fun, but still.”

Rosé shrugged as she tried to fix her hair, settling on a messy bun. “It’s a tradition, baby. Monthly movie night is something we’ve done since college.” 

“At least I like your friends, I’ve almost gotten into fights with my exes’ friends,” Denali recalled.

“Almost?”

She rolled her eyes and huffed. “Yes, almost. I did not fight anyone at any point even though some of them really deserved it. It wouldn’t have been a fair fight and I’m not trying to spend another night in jail.” 

Rosé laughed and shook her head fondly. “Nali, you are definitely one of a kind,” she cooed as she wrapped her arms around her waist and pulled her close, “so I’m glad you’re mine,” she added with a kiss.

“And you’re not just sweet-talking me to make up for whatever the pussy equivalent of blue balls is?” 

“Nope!” Denali answered as she revved it up, “so stand back.”

Rosé immediately stepped out of the way, but watched her warily, “and you’re sure you don’t wanna hire a professional or get a tree from a shop?”

“Why spend fifty bucks when all I need is my dad’s chainsaw? I’ve watched him do it plenty,” she shrugged. And by nothing short of divine intervention, the tree fell without causing them or their belongings any damage.

“I’m pretty sure you’re a witch,” she blinked as she watched the entire scene unfold.

Denali was unfazed by the accusation and tossed a pair of worker’s gloves to her. “Put these on and help me strap up this bad boy to the hood,” she instructed.

“Not the type of strapping up I usually do, but I think I’ll manage,” Rosé chuckled as she hauled the tree up and fastened it to the roof of the car. “All this to have your own Christmas tree, huh?”

“It might not be!” Rosé insisted, “it could be a Husky or German Shepard or—”

“Babe,” Denali cut her off, “I grew up in Alaska, there were no shortages of wolves, including wolf puppies, which that definitely is.”

She scooped up the pup and held him up. “But look how cute he is, how could you say no to this face?”

She pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m going to say this once and I am going to say it clearly. We. Cannot. Keep. A. Wolf. How do you expect to keep one in an apartment anyway?”

“We can housebreak him!”

Denali blinked, starting to wonder if her girlfriend had officially lost whatever was left of her mind. “Do you hear yourself?”

Rosé huffed and finally relented. “Well, we have to make sure he’s okay before we leave,” she insisted.

“Fine, fine,” she acquiesced. “We’ll find a vet or something to check him out before we go home and follow their advice, okay?”