#christianresponse

Understanding the Last Supper First, let’s examine what the Last Supper scene truly represents. The painting by Leonardo da Vinci is already a controversial subject, so let’s set it aside and focus on the account from the Gospel of John, as His word is the ultimate truth. John portrays the Last Supper as an errand of love: the Master washing the feet of His disciples and establishing the New…

"One thing I am not, is embarrassed or ashamed to be black. One thing i am, is afraid to be black anywhere." -a friend on facebook

This one hit me, and i decided to comment back, but then i pulled back and deleted it. Here's basically what I had said: "TBH, I'm the opposite. There are many times where I'm ashamed and embarrassed to be white, but normally perfectly fine to be the only white girl in a crowd...right now, i'm scared- ashamed, embarrassed, AND afraid."

Then i deleted it, thinking that if someone read that in the wrong tone of voice, they would think i'm undermining the struggle of the person who posted the status and i also felt i was partially wrong because everyone's afraid right now. 

She then messaged me, asking if i had deleted my comment and i began to explain to her why, starting with that^...then, i went further. 

In reality, I'm scared of my ignorance. 

Then, i began to unpack where that came from. You see, I tend to be quite passionate about racial reconciliation, but sometimes I pull back because I know i'm still very ignorant to a lot. That's because, being a white person, I am inherently ignorant to racism- which is a factor of white privilege.

Think about this for a minute.

Part of our racial inheritance is ignorance to a pain that we've never really had to endure because white people have always been in power and always been in charge of things in America. We've never had to rally together as a people because we've never been oppressed. That's why we as white people don't quite understand why black people rally or why protests like this are important. We as white people don't have that kind of community complex because we've never had to have it for our survival. 

So...the real reason i pulled back is because of my white privilege. It allows me to ignore the problem (because I don't actually have to deal with it in my own life) and it gives me a reason to pull back (I'm ignorant and will sound stupid). I hate getting into a conversation and people hearing my ignorance to the pain. I hate my white privilege. My inherent ignorance is in reality, one of the main reasons I'm ashamed and embarrassed to be white sometimes. I hear alot of white people say stuff like, "this isn't a white or black issue" or "I'm so done with this",

It's only because of your privilege that you don't see this is a white or black issue, and it's only because of your privilege that you can say, "I'm so done with this". You get to be done with this. Black people don't get to be done with this, because they will still be profiled by us whether we realize we're doing it or not.

That is why I'm ashamed and embarrassed...we don't get it. I don't get it. There have been many times where I've been out with friends and they just say something completely ignorant and i just cover my face with my hands...then there have also been many times where I've been the reason my more educated friend has covered her face in embarrassment. I don't know all the stories. I grew up knowing MLK, Rosa Parks and the underground railroad and that's about it. I didn't pay much attention because that stuff was in the past, and I thought it didn't happen anymore. I grew up in a white bubble (aka, my immediate circle was upper/middle class whiteness).  You see, it's this endless circle of us misunderstanding others and ourselves. It both is and isn't our fault that we don't understand. We've inherited this, and sometimes we find it more comfortable to remain in our ignorance or have a false humility that says it isn't important for us to try and understand (I mean, what can a white girl do anyway, right?). This is our inheritance- comfort in our selfish misunderstanding. 

Now....let me bring you to someone who is giving me a new inheritance.

In Christ, I've been given a new inheritance- one that says there is neither Jew nor Greek, male nor female because we are all one in HIm. We are all sinners saved by one Jesus, under one God, one faith, one baptism, filled with the same Spirit. This inheritance also tells me to mourn with those who mourn and to be quick to listen. When people hurt, we hurt with them  and we listen to them because we understand this reality in the Gospel that Christ came to save the human race. We no longer have to save face because we're all bad and we all don't get each other because we're now being rehabilitated (or sanctified) by the Spirit from the past life we've lived, consumed with ourselves.

I’m sitting in a bed while thousands of miles away from home, across the ocean blue. I brought a missions team down to the sleepy village of Neply, Haiti to assist with an organization called #myLIFEspeaks. I happened to be the only one on our team to contract a mosquito born illness called chikagunya, which is sweeping this country like a raging wild fire.  In all honestly, I’m glad it was me,…