Last night, we had to say goodbye to River. She was a great cat and she turned me into a cat person, along with her sister Rose--whom we had to say goodbye to back in March.

We're all still a wreck today, though we're slowly recovering. Poor Ian has not really known life without River, since @chimericaloutlier got Rose and River before she ever met me and we moved in together when Ian was only 2.

Here he is cuddling and watching Godzilla movies with her.

The kittens loved her, too, especially Spock--though he was always too rough with her and she didn't want to play with him. I think Toothless was her favorite.

Here River is cuddling with Tutu (what we call Toothless) only a day or two ago.

At least we can take some small comfort in the fact that she is with her sister again.

Her whole life is the John Mulaney "This might as well happen" meme

​EXACTLY

It's especially hilarious to me, because Ingva was all heart-eyes at Duncan and Alistair, like, you got me out of Dust Town, I'm helping save the world, this is AMAZING! (Also, yk, Alistair made her laugh, which isn't a thing that had happened much in her life, so. Heart-eyes.)

If you can talk to your doctor about it, I recommend doing so!! The body is a complex mechanism, especially as it relates to the brain. It is not a failure of will, even if it feels that way, to feel scattered and unable to focus when you're constantly being bombarded with pain signals. Give yourself credit that you're doing your best.

Thank you! I don’t really feel that I am doing my best, but I also don’t know how I would get to the point where I am. Like I don’t know how I’d go about doing my best. I’m giving it another 2 months to see if things level out. My parents and my dude are pretty unimpressed that I’m still getting pain, but these things take time I think, especially since there’s so little research. Thank you for your reply :)

fursasaida replied to your post“HELLO I feel like I haven’t done anything productive in like, at least...”

maybe see a doctor to rule some things out like ADD? i wasn't diagnosed till i was 26

I don't want to be one of Those People, so this advice is given freely and feel no need to heed it. I often have a lot of neck pain that culminates in tension headaches; the way I'm constantly having to look down to do my job doesn't help much either. My massage therapist told me to start doing 6 point neck stretches, and it's helped immensely with my neck pain and tension headaches, by loosening the tendons in my neck and shoulders.

In celebration of the 10th anniversary of Pacific Rim, a fun reminder of the impact it has had on my life:

When @chimericaloutlier and I first messaged each other on a dating app, she had noticed I love Godzilla and she asked me how I felt about Pacific Rim. (Which was less than a year old at that point) When I said that I loved it, she was elated because she also adored the film.

I took that to be a very good sign, and I was right!

Four years later, our wedding cake toppers were Knifehead and Cherno Alpha with the words "Drift Compatible." Obviously, the idea was that we were both piloting Cherno Alpha.

Like when I saw that Hallmark has a rather terrifying Gollum ornament this year:

So, naturally, I texted it to @chimericaloutlier so I would not be burdened with this knowledge on my own (and since we were in polite company this was better than merely showing her). She responded by wondering what was under his loin cloth.

Naturally, I replied, "That's where you hide the Christmas pickle." She replied with a vomit emoji.

Then it hit me: "She Gollum on My Precious until I taters."

She replied with a laughing emoji, but I didn't think the joke was all the way there yet.

Then, last night as I was brushing my teeth before bed, out of nowhere the perfect phrasing hit me.

So, right as my poor tired spouse was literally closing her eyes to go to bed, a good five days after I had made the initial joke, I rushed into the bedroom to triumphantly declare:

"She Gollum on My Precious till I Smeagol!"