#chappy

we’re so worn out and energyless and weird that hawkeye has become a little tuxedo kitty and is snoozing in my arms. my sweetie

it’s hard not to be jealous of hawkeye sometimes. he’s more attractive and is more confident and generally has more things going for him. and kitty is a lot more open about being sexually attracted to him - we’ve talked about that disparity but every so often i get a pang of feeling like i’m not really desirable, like i’m just some guy standing in our polycule, not as much involved. i know that’s my insecurity, it just eats at me when i go a while without it being challenged. my dynamic with kitty is different and with things they’re going through lately it doesn’t seem like it’s going to change much. but hawk is really sweet… he’s been thinking that it’s unfair for me to feel this way. ;_; i love him very much

headspace sex 👍

pmsing and therefore dysphoric as fuck + stressed about work + so tired i am sickly + hawkeye is sad he missed his anniversary with jesse. can things get regular

got legit dysphoric today because i don’t have a tdick yet. maybe it is that serious