the reason the scrybes were ok with hurting the challenger was because they knew the challenger wasn't a real person. the challenger was just a conduit for the player in the outside world to interact with the game world of inscryption. they weren't sentient. they weren't alive. it was ok to hurt them to make the experience more entertaining for the player.
but...i was a real person. i was sentient. i was alive. and where does that put me? what does that imply? what does that mean?
did the scrybes know? they knew so much about the world we existed in. how would they have missed my sapience? our sapience? i wasn't the only challenger. i highly doubt i was the only one with a self. didn't they know? did they just not care? p03 and magnificus, maybe, but i can't see leshy and grimora making the conscious choice to hurt us if they had known. but how could they not have? i shouldn't be saying things like that, i know the scrybes weren't omniscient by any means, but i just...i just wonder. i try not to, but i wonder.
sometimes i try to convince myself it was fine. that it doesn't matter what happened to me then. you are a character in a video game. you are a proxy for the player. you are not a person. write the player a good story. give the player a good game. the cards. the camera. the pliers. the dagger. grit your teeth and bear it. it's worth it. make the player happy. it's worth it. you weren't supposed to be a person. you aren't supposed to be a person. who are you? what are you? does it matter? did it ever?
...sorry. i'm ok. i just think about it a lot sometimes. it hurts.
— the challenger (inscryption)
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