Sep 9, 2019
"Yeah, but you don't want a /guy/ to have a bubble butt"
Uh, first of all, coward,
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"Yeah, but you don't want a /guy/ to have a bubble butt"
Uh, first of all, coward,
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when you've been really looking forward to your high school reunion but you have shingles
Just did an intake appointment for therapy.
:)
good date
happy person
literally just got THE best tumblr ad:
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workin on a little thing I like to call
emotional vulnerability
Man, that reminds me. I used to think if I outwardly hated myself, the people who saw my flaws (which was obviously every person who ever interacted with me, right?) would understand that I also saw them and so not hate me. Wtf twisted logic. Also wtf motivation.
You just gotta let yourself live and not decide for other people how they see you. Just be you, do you, don't worry about it.
storytime
Quickly, about me: I'm starting a PhD program in a few weeks.
Okay. Before I even applied to the program I eventually decided to join (and will be attending soon), I asked to tour one of the labs. (Quick aside, I am and always have been jazzed about this lab, like they're the reason I'm going for more school.)
They set up a tour with one of the current students. He was super nice and helpful and also sweet and kind and I was kind of interested in him, although I wasn't sure if it was genuine or more on the side of Wow This Could Be My Future, because I was fucking floored to be there. Losing my damn mind over this lab. Anyway I erred on the latter.
Fast-forward, god I don't know, 10 months I think. I have reinstalled tinder for non-dating purposes as previously mentioned. (Not hookups either; just nice to see other people existing tbh.) I'm on it at my friend's apartment, outside of my geographical range of matches, and holy fuck. There's the grad student who gave me the tour.
I was like holy shit what do I do??? I actually was kind of interested in this guy and now here he is? Available? And I guess if I 'like' him he only sees it if he 'likes' me back (unless he paid for likes which is doubtful). So what the heck, I clicked like.
And got a match.
So. Now I don't know what to do. Probably not a good idea to date within the lab. I think I'll just say "hey I recognized you! I start soon!" blah blah blah just be friendly. Idk wish me luck. I badly don't want to fuck up grad school like I fucked up undergrad.