This was a difficult situation he had put himself in. Much like the rest of the DPD, they all held some sort of resentment towards Androids, Allen was no different but he knew the reason Allen didnât like them. If he hadnât been impressed with androids before, he sure wasnât now and that had been his fault. Despite his best efforts, he had treated the deviant like a machine and Daniel had jumped off the roof with Emma. He had tried to catch her, nearly taking himself off the roof with them but he watched them fall and after that, he hated what he had done next.Â
He silently reported back to Cyberlife about what happened, noting that he was damaged and was told to return. He had done just that, got up and walked off the scene, not saying a word to anyone. Not to Allen, not to the grieving mother who had lost her husband and now her daughter. He got back in a taxi and returned to Cyberlife. He had been able to reflect on that mission for two months but lacking the basic understanding to how he could relate to the situation had affected his performance. He knew why Daniel had deviated but he didnât understand why at the time. Now that he was a deviant, he had experienced more things in a spend of a week then most people have in a year, he had a much better understanding of things but also lacked understanding in others.
He wasnât sure how to approach this conversation, so he started it off with a fact. Allen was the best candidate to help him understand. He was a captain, he years of wisdom but more importantly, he had been there and seen what happened. After being able to reflect on the mission again without his limitations, he realized just how cold he had appeared and wished more than anything that he could have handled the deviant and the aftermath better. A child had died and he treated it as fact, Cyberlife didnât help in the matter either, treating it as a good test run and laying blame heavily on the deviant when questioned by the media.
âCorrect.â He paused for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts. âBut... I donât know how to explain it. Emma is dead, Iâm largely to blame for that. I lacked the basic understanding and experience to have properly gauged the situation but I donât want to hide behind excuses. I could have done better, I should have done better.â He stated, having not made eye contact with Allen when he started to explain.
âI now understand why Daniel killed Mr. Phillips, I knew he found out he was being replaced but at the time, I didnât understand how he felt. Weâre machines, replacement was just something to expect, I was threatened to be replaced by Cyberlife if I didnât start yielding results, meaning I can now relate to that part of the situation. Daniel cared about the family, cared about Emma. I donât condone his actions and I still donât understand why he would go to such an extream if he really cared about the family.â It wasnât until he was finished that statement that he finally made eye contact with him.
âIf I knew back then what I know now, things might have turned out diffriently but I canât change the past and I canât undo the damage Iâve caused. I also regret the way I conducted myself afterwards. It was cold and I should have shown more empathy. I want to learn from my mistakes so that if Iâm ever placed in that situation again, Iâll know better.â He stated, he wasnât sure how Allen could help but he had learned a lot from Hank just by talking and having his insight on matters had helped him to better judge some situations.Â