In Matthew 5:23 – 24, the Bible says, “Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” I want to make an observation on this. Notice, that is is not just if you have a problem with somebody, it’s if you know that they have a problem with you. The best life is you taking the responsibility and going to make it right. Blessed are the peacemakers. Blessed are the merciful for they shall obtain mercy.
The book of James says this, “Judgment without mercy will be shown to everyone who is not merciful for mercy triumphs over justice.”
If you know of anyone who has a problem with you, don’t even put an offering in the basket but go and make it right. We must stop the slippery slope by breaking the cycle with forgiveness. Jesus addresses this in Matthew 18. It’s such an awesome story. It’s about a man who had a debt he couldn’t pay. The king cancelled his debt and then the man left the king’s presence and found a person that owed him a few dollars and choked him and threw him in prison because he couldn’t pay his debt. Someone reported this man to the king for throwing the debtor into prison. The king summoned the man, called him a wicked person and threw him over to the tormentors to be tortured until he could pay his debt. And then Jesus said the scariest line in all of Scripture; This is how My Heavenly Father will treat each of you if you don’t forgive your brother from your heart.
The most freeing part of that whole Scripture was how Jesus defined forgiveness. He didn’t define forgiveness as denying that the issue hurt; He didn’t define forgiveness as forgetting it, He didn’t define forgiveness by pretending it didn’t happen. This is how He defined forgiveness: Cancel their debt. In other words, deep in your heart, think about that person and can have this thought – you don’t owe me anymore. If you want to break the cycle of anger and contempt in your life and you don’t want to be a murderer, the best way to do it is this to cancel the debt.
It doesn’t mean it wasn’t wrong, it doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt, it doesn’t mean you should lend them any more money; it just means you must cancel the debt and let it go. Let it go.