#camrytext

I really fuck with how Oczy and Badeni are both missing a big chunk of themselves when they first meet, and by interacting with each other they both become more whole. As it turns out, they both possess something the other needs.

I like how Oczy when we first meet him was ACTUALLY sort of paralleling Nowak the way he said "welp, it's my job, so..." before killing one of the guys he dueled. He didn't like his job, but he didn't know a different way of life existed. He didn't even hope that a different way of life existed. This man gave up on thinking for himself because he perceived it was pointless. It was peak learned helplessness: when Gras asked him to accompany him, Oczy couldn't decide for himself what he should do so he deferred the decision to Gras.

And then we get Badeni, who is the antithesis to all this: he makes decisions based solely on serving himself and reaching his own glory. We learn he wasn't always like this, and it is in fact a result of him being hardened by life experiences (betrayal by a colleague). His experiences taught him that collaboration is detrimental and dangerous.

But then he's forced to team up with both Oczy (and by extension, Rafal -- as he led him to the stone chest in the woods) and Jolenta (and by extension, Count Piast and HIS predecessor) and any unnamed contributors came before him (history! which he turns his nose at first) to complete the heliocentric theory.

Just some random scattered thoughts here but like:

I like how Oczy is first depicted being afraid of the night sky because it reminds him of the higher class looking down upon the lower class, and then by the throes of fate is forced to work with a well-educated guy of a higher class who doesn't hesitate to disparage him at any second of the day -- a guy who is LITERALLY his worst nightmare. <- interestingly, Badeni can't physically see Oczy very well. I wonder if Oczy knows this and unintentionally feels more comfortable being around Badeni.

I like how Badeni is hyper-individualistic while Oczy is too dependent on others, and then later we see Badeni actually trusting others to the point he leaves it up to Grabowski and fate itself to carry on his legacy -- which technically isn't even HIS legacy as it is Oczy's writing he is preserving.

I like how we go from helpless Oczy who can't bring himself to look at the night sky -- who throws decisions onto other people -- who can't imagine anything else other than misery in his life and wants to go to Heaven to be relieved of it all ... to Oczy who "wants" to see a full Venus. who "wants" to learn how to read and write. who puts down the sword (which he never liked in the first place) to pick up the pen. who picks up the sword ON HIS OWN VOLITION as he realizes he must act in order to save heliocentricism (and Badeni).

I like how Badeni goes from disparaging Oczy at every opportunity to recognizing his game and pausing to hear his opinions, and telling him he'd like to debate him at a later time.

I like how when Oczy wakes up from his coma, Nowak tells him "there are some weird guys who endure the pain" "in these cases, we have to use something more valuable to barter with: like family, friends, collaborators..." and then he brings Badeni into the room. Seeing as Oczy's been out for a week, it implies Badeni did get tortured off-camera and turned out to be "one of those weirdoes who don't crack".

...But then the ONE thing that DOES make him crack is threatening Oczy's eyeballs.

When Oczy questions Badeni "why'd you save my eyeballs if we're gonna die anyway" Badeni responds with "you have no idea how painful that is".

"That" is vague here for a reason. It could be Badeni referring to the physical pain of getting your eyeballs gouged out. It could be Badeni referring to the emotional torture of losing the ability to look up at the stars and witness God's glory -- the emotional torture of having your love (in his case, learning) ripped from you by some arbitrary power. Also I don't know much about the Christian version of Heaven but maybe he also wanted Oczy to retain his sight in the afterlife. And his actions allowed Oczy to be able to see the stars for one last time.

The stickers I made looks so janky with that Avery label still attached fjdsjhfjdsfh (in hindsight I should've cut it off...)

About "Harold"... Here is the context:

Here's the rest of the stickerpack and what Biktor originally looked like... he looked like he was wearing a toupee so I fixed it in the final but LMAO there is something endearing about the wig version.

Also I originally drew him SO HUGE. He almost took up the FULL CANVAS of my comic manuscript (A5 at 600 dpi). Thanks Biktor for keeping me company during the roughest of my inking sessions.

I hope Garcia stays the way she is. Detached and locked in.

IDK, as much as I perk up everytime a surgeon graces us with their presence (Emery Walsh MD aurafarming episode WHENNN??) I feel like the surgery team is cool BECAUSE they're static characters for the dynamic characters (most of the trainees + Robby) to bounce off of. It's the reaction to the static characters that allow for the dynamic characters of the cast to stand out and show growth. Ykwim?

I wonder if Santos is supposed to be an unreliable narrator here the way she mentioned she was a "social pariah" -- but is she actually being treated that way? To me it seems like their coworkers are glad Langdon's got the help he needed and people appear to be treating Santos normally -- maybe this is something that did happen off camera, but I find TEN months of continuous catty behavior to be OOC for The Pitt. They're too busy being locked in trying to save people. My spidey senses are telling me that this is Santos' being hypervigilant due to the stress and guilt she felt about doing the right thing -- and that it's not a real thing.

She's also having Not The Greatest Of Days -- like, Garcia, her "casual hookup" (apparently not casual in Santos' POV...!) is rainchecking on their date and is super happy to have Langdon back. In fact, everybody (except Robby) is SOOOO happy to have Langdon back. Meanwhile, the new attending has been on her ass all day about medical charting, and she doesn't even get thirty seconds to sit down and get caught up before she gets interrupted. I think Langdon's presence bothers her not only because of their rocky past, but because they have a lot of the same strengths. I wonder if her feeling like a social pariah is more akin to her feeling like she's being replaced by someone people have known longer and is more experienced than her.

Going back to the unreliable narrator thing: when she said to Garcia "he should have been fired" -- does she actually want him to be fired as a punishment, or is she just dreading speaking to the guy and being vulnerable? Hmm. I'm doubting her because she seems like the type to believe people can change. Like she's got a traumatic past and demons of her own -- she's her own reminder that people can overcome tremendous obstacles in life and she's written too empathetically to genuinely want Langdon to lose his job and be 100% cool with it. I think she just wants to avoid him, and if he had gotten fired, well, it would have been much more convenient than having to work with him again!

-Garcia's quips make me laugh like no one else on the show i swear to god. this woman comes down to aura farm for 20 seconds and then dips with no explanation. she's highly employed is what she is -- no need for an explanation.

-Also same with Emery Walsh LMAO... the moment Garcia didn't immediately take the opportunity to be Primary Surgery during the mass casualty event and was at least peripherally looking at Walsh, I was like "who is THIS bad bitch??" And then she accepts, with "heavy is the head that wears the crown". okaaay???! She also aura farmed for two episodes, quipped with Jack Abbot, and dipped. I need her back.

-Joy Kwon is very spicy and I like her... I want Abbot and her to interact more. In the meantime I'll be in the AO3 tags looking these two up (sorry, I like my ships to be an HR nightmare).

-I miss Santos' and McKay's S1 hairstyles... Santos with her shrimp antennae coming out of her ponytail was a Look and McKay's blunt bangs were really cute...!!!

-I can't get over Langdon and Santos looking at each other awkwardly in S2. Her extending an olive branch by repeating their interaction about guessing the BAC from S1 verbatim... okayyy ... Joy Kwon in the background being confused bc she's good but she's not fluent in whatever language they are speaking. Sorry girl, you have to find you own narrative parallel. I've been in the AO3 tags for Langtos before I even watched the show and ya know what, I'm still in there slurping shit up. I love it. I love it when capable women and capable men have beef with each other and yet respect each other for their talents. It's lovely and hot and honestly I kinda don't want the tension resolved TOO quickly.

-Langdon looking at Robby in both S1 and S2 kills me. The sad, desperate puppy eyes emanating off of him... I would crack immediately ngl

-I do want Mel's sister to bring back the "You have to find someone to kiss!" from S1 full circle. You know what I mean...? idk fanfics have probably already been written. Yeahhhh Mel might have found someone to kiss, but she doesn't realize yet and he might still be married oohh!!!

-Al-Hashimi is kind of a slay and yes I did raise my eyebrows over her promotion of AI tools but it seems this part of her character is being narratively challenged by the tech shutdown, and she's still proving herself to be very capable and empathetic.

-The way Santos was annoyed at her but immediately perked up when Al-Hashimi complimented her was SO funny-- she acts tough but she loves it when more experienced people compliment her work :'( she's so cute... also she's not good at hiding emotions so everything shows up on her face... cute...

-DANA..... DANA.................... <33333333333333333

-It took me a while to figure out who "evil Whittaker" was -- IDK I don't think Ogilvie and Whittaker look alike or act alike -- other than being white boys... is it the treatment of his character by other characters that make people draw a comparison? Is it his fuckups? Honestly I'm thinking Ogilvie is more "S1 Santos in boldface font". He's grating but I'm sure he'll come around. This is literally his first shift at the ER... gotta give it some time.

no like i literally screamed into my fists "what the FUCK?????????" when Badeni started praying for Oczy and I thought that was going to be this big shonen manga moment where Oczy maims Nowak and they both get to ride off into the night and they reunite years later MY MIND was already thinking up of good end scenarios and i didn't know he'd get CAUGHT and they'd both HANG TOGETHER WHILE EXPERIENCING GOD THROUGH THE BEAUTIFUL NIGHT SKY?!???!? ARE YOU SHITTING ME??? I MEAN IT WAS POETIC BUT IT ALSO DEVASTATED ME *downloading the soundtrack so I can devastate myself during business hours*