Caleb & I
Part 5
(Caleb being a Menace)
Caleb follows you everywhere. Kitchen? There. Study room? There. Bathroom?
“Babe, are you alive in there? Don’t ignore me for soap and shampoo.”
You once turned around too fast and bumped into him because he was that close behind. Caleb just grins,
“See? Even fate wants us attached.”
He gets pouty when you hang out with friends.
“You’ve been with them for three hours. That’s three hours of me suffering in silence.”
“You could’ve called someone else.”
“There’s no one else. There’s you, and then… background noise.”
When you tell him to give you space, he dramatically sprawls across the bed.
“I gave you space.
This much—” (moves one inch away) “—and it physically hurts.”
He sits behind you when you’re working, chin on your shoulder, whispering nonsense like,
“What if I just uninstall your assignments and install kisses instead?”
Bro what
Caleb will glare at your phone if you’re smiling at messages.
“Who’s making you laugh harder than me? Who dares.”
He’s a menace texter, sends things like:
“You alive?”
“What are you doing?”
“Who are you doing it with?”
“Do I need to fight anyone?”
Caleb has a bad habit of picking you up mid-argument.
“I win. You can’t argue if you’re off the floor.”
He’ll threaten anyone who flirts with you, but quietly, smiling the whole time
“That’s a nice hand you’ve got there. Keep it away from what’s mine.”
He keeps stealing your things. Lip balm, Hair ties, Snacks. He’ll deny it, too all while wearing you lip balm, eating your chips.
“You are insufferable."
“Its called being ‘romantically territorial."
You eyed him
"What? It Sounds classier.”
When you talk about your celebrity crush, Caleb looks offended.
“He’s not even real."
And you are?
He constantly interrupts you:
“…and then Sarah said—”
“Who’s Sarah, and why do I hate her already?”
He absolutely loves holding your hand in public, but if you let go for even one second, he’ll dramatically gasp
“Abandonment. At its finest.”
You try to take a nap, and he climbs right in beside you.
“If you’re unconscious, I’m unconscious too. That’s love.”
Sometimes he just stares at you until you notice. When you ask why, he says,
“I’m checking to make sure no one replaced you with an inferior clone.”
He once got jealous of a stray cat.
“It sits on your lap for hours. I sit on your lap once and you call me heavy.”
You tried to go out alone one day, and Caleb just appeared like a ghost behind you
“Funny coincidence, I was heading in the same direction — wherever you’re going.”
When you scold him for being overprotective, he leans closer and murmurs,
“Then stop giving me reasons to guard you like treasure.”
But when he’s softer, he’ll cup your face and whisper,
“You don’t get it, pipsqueak. I don’t want to own you, I just want to be where you are. Always.”
