#c!bdoubleo100

When it started out, in 3rd life, I think it started with them being very very close friends- and this will never change their friendship will out way a lot of the hate, even the love, because no matter what they're friends that care about each other, and I think for Impulse this is specifically important to mention. Because of course after 3rd life, after the betrayal, there will be that hate, that disappointment that betrayal, that anger, and it sits in his chest, it sits in his chest every single time he sees his friend after this, especially after the fact that in the end game- Impulse and Bdubs started show a really intense affection towards one another. So when that betrayal came up, it was really really hard. But the thing is, while impulse holds a grudge, and oh he holds it hard, he doesn't show it as aggressive as most people might. All in all impulse is REALLY REALLY friendly. He loves his friends so so much, he cares a lot about all of them, but with certain people there is this feeling that makes him feel frustrated, angry, but he's really good at hiding it. Bdubs is sorta one of these people.

So during last life, bdubs and impulse didn't interact a lot with one another but when they do, it ends up being ... well, tense. When Impulse sees Bdubs his chest hurts, not only his heart for his friend who betrayed him, for someone he loved, in a way, but also the feeling of the scar that lingers from the final attack from when bdubs permakilled him. It was an intense pain that he knew how to hide, but it sat there every time he looked at this man. The man who took his life.

And I think that something interesting that happened in last life is when they did interact it was kinda hostile. Of course they're still friends, they're still caring about each other but they are taking a LOT of space from one another. They do NOT want to interact a lot. But when Impulse helped Grian with the wither, I think he really did it to kinda hit back at Bdubs. When Bdubs died to the wither, he came back, towards Grian and Impulse and yelled something along the lines of "Are you happy with yourselves?!" Or something like that, something parallel to that kinda thing and I think the smirk that Impulse had on his face was BIG with a refreshing feeling of revenge. It wasn't he who cause his permadeath, sure, but he got back HARD on Bdubs. And I think that this feeling of relief and is really the reason why that Impulse can actually be with Bdubs in the next life is because he got this revenge. But of course, in the same way, it wasn't really... enough. Even when seeing the scar that was left on BDubs from the wither

But when it comes to double life, it changed. Because these two, they're a power couple, they're in love, they will not stop portraying this OFTEN with one another in front of people and with themselves too! But the thing is, how they got there is ... weird. When Impulse and Bdubs were first interacting in double life, Impulse put it together QUICKLY that he was Bdubs' soulmate after they met up (with etho and scar) but Impulse REALLY really didn't want this. Listen, he loves his friend, he cares about Bdubs, there isn't something that could change his care for his friends, no matter what. Even if Impulse can hold a grudge real fucking hard, he also still loves people so so much, too much, to hate unreasonably. But when it comes to all of this? He couldn't convince himself that he could be connected to Bdubs. He couldnt' imagine living, protecting him, with his own life. Not after what happened. But then as time went on, something chaneged-

Something that happened to a lot of the people who were connected- it wasn't just their lives but their hearts that were connected. Their emotions, their love, their hate-

And suddenly there was a LOT of love in his heart, there was this sudden burst of affection, of love, and there was no reason for it. The only explanation that could come to Impulse was the love that BDUBS felt- felt for him felt for the situation, especially after Bdubs and Impulse figured out that they were soulmates officially. But Bdubs also felt the frustration the grief the betrayal that sat in Impulse's heart and he found himself really really wanting to make it up to Impulse, to show the love that he really had for Impulse and I think Bdubs' love alone built Impulse up so so much, built the love Impulse had for Bdubs and built up their relationship. The hate, the betrayed feeling that sat in Impulse's chest becomes muffled and he's engulfed with this love for Bdubs and that's why they can truly be a couple through and through, even till the end.

With Limited life his feelings of betrayal and hate does bubble up again because that connection that he had with bdubs gets severed after they die and the uncomparable love that sat in Bdubs chest leaves. He still loves Bdubs, this will never change, but now that betrayal sits in his chest again and from what I know of Impulse's pov and, from what happens with him and bdubs, because the love that he felt from Bdubs fading because their connection severs, Impulse almost like- 'rebounds' in a way into that hate and wanting to get that true revenge because until he gets a perma kill on bdubs that want for revenge will never go away. And while he still loves bdubs, the fact that hate and that betrayal came back so suddenly without bdubs' love to muffle it really fueled him wanting to get revenge

But when it comes to Secret life- I think so much time has passed, years- that Impulse has had so much time to sit- to think. Maybe even WITH bdubs in double life- i mean with the fact that impulse gave bdubs a clock in double life all of it, I'm sure they discussed what had happened, the feelings that, now, they BOTH were feeling that originated from Impulse's heart. When it comes to Secret life, Impulse has finally learned to forget but there's something missing- something needs to really set it in place and thats why when heard Bdubs and Gem, his very very close friend, talking about death or something, he voulenteers. The interaction they have, "Bring the smoke" becomes what builds up their friendship, even the love they had again because it's this consensual death that impulse wanted, that he became EXILERATED with. It was a new age for the two, a new moment, a new feeling and how this kill, rather than representing death and betrayal, symbolizes rebirth and change.

(The last line is inspired by @mxmarsbars)