#bvbarmys

edit i made using 1 of Ashley’s famous quotes <3

Here is another Christmas edit BVB  Andy and Ashley wishing everyone a Merry Christmas <3 

I broken down when i saw this. It speaks way to close to home. I know I needed this  He only said 2 words but i never expected him to see my post let alone reply; because i know they are all busy and have lives, i know they can’t be everywhere at once. but i send them not to be replied to but its a way of getting something off my chest because i know even if they dont see or dont reply or anything i know there is that slight possibility that they may have seen it and though they dont reply that they do care and even if they dont say anything via anything that they do send their love regardless.  Love them and always will I will find a way to meet them, dont care what I have to do, im currently going through VHS Tapes to sell them to generate money so that i can do what i want to do for somethings. They keep me going in this sometimes cruel and hate filled world. NOTHING will change that for me ABSOLUTELY nothing.  If any of you are going through Depression, Anxiety, Suicidal thoughts, Ana or Mia, or anything you have going on that you want to talk to someone about I AM HERE i will never turn someone away trying to reach out, I may not have the answer for your problems but at least you know you have somewhere you can come and talk to about anything that is bothering you, i dont care what it is, or if you just need a distraction to keep your mind from thinking certain things. I am here always will be, I will never walk away from someone in need. never will i turn my back on you, You have me in your corner for all eternity. sounds creepy but you know what i mean. You have someone you can talk to, to vent to even if its just to have someone listen for once without giving their two cents and if you are one of those that just wants someone to vent to before you type anything do say that you just want to say what you need to before i comment or anything or even say your not looking for a comment or advice but just a place to leave your burdens so your not the only one carrying them i will carry them with you, you will never be alone.     

I had sent a letter to BVB told them basically what was going on when i discovered them and how they helped me through so much and Amy god Bless her soul sent me this, I do admit, i never thought this would happen, because of how i grew up things like this in my family are almost never heard of so getting this means more to me then anything. I’ve had Chris Andy’s dad talk to me and give me advice on things, have i spoken with Andy? no and I do not expect to, I dont do the things i do, say the things i say to get a response from them my goal is simply to put positive things on their media feeds, express my respect and love for people who have in many ways than one have helped me through my dark struggles, You may call me insane, you may see me as “worshiping” but no im just very protective of those i care for, and yes i care about Andy i care about Juliet, I care about Jake, I care about Inna,  I care about Ashley, I care about Jinxx, I care about Alice, I care about Chris Coma, I care about Anna, I care about Chris Biersack, I care about Amy Biersack and everyone else in their lives, I keep these in a container that I decorated, so that both the note and the small poster photo would not get damaged in anyway. They ARE the reason I am personally still here today, gave me my voice, NO Linkin and Good Charlotte and bands alike didn’t give me my voice. It is, was, always has been 2 bands BVB and Falling In Reverse,  I never got into heavier music really until 2012 SHOCKER yeah i know. Not because I did not like them or hated them but because before I used to be extremely cautious of people around me, i was a social butterfly i guess but it was because i craved friends, those around me though didn’t accept me as who i am, never really took the time to get to know me. It wasn’t until 2012 after my grandmother had passed away and i was dealing with other personal issues at hand, i felt lost, i did not know what to do, who to turn to, i felt alone, when my grandmother died 6 years ago, I had a bad feeling the entire day i was at school, something was off something wasn’t right, when my dad picked me and my cousin up from school, he took us to the back porch, the feeling i had, had amplified when we all sat down, the moment my dad said “Something I need to say” is when i asked the most painful question I have ever asked, one i asked hadn’t been true “ She’s gone isn’t she” my dad just looked at me and confirmed it was so. I felt so lost, couple weeks went by an my best friend at the time had  showed me a song called In The End by Black Veil Brides. Now I had remembered them from before when I heard Perfect Weapon, and at that time i was scared of the idea of being myself, letting people see who i am not allowing people to tell me who i should be. I was confused as hell 5 guys telling people to be themselves I thought they were insane. but when i was listening to In The End it caused me to look at my grandmothers death more peacefully then i had been, it was the first night that i actually got a full nights sleep. BVB saved me because I was very very close to choosing to leave this world, I could not handle being on a floating rock without my grandmother/best friend by my side.    BVB changed my life, helped me out of the struggle that was in my mind allowed me to find Self Love after all the years of Self Doubt, wondering what my part of this world did i belong. My life is not the cherry on the top of the milkshake, my life is not full of unicorns and balloons, i have my struggles just like everyone else  They mean a lot to me, for what they do for their fans, the fact that their family cares about their sons fans? BVB helped me find the light at the end of my tunnel I can finally look into a mirror without hatred towards myself. I can now look into a mirror and say that I am Proud of who i am I could not ask for anything more, I dont expect a response from any Member of BVB because honestly im just a fan, yeah they see the Army as family and i look up to them as brothers and i see the girls as sisters that i never had. They are the kindest souls ive ever come to know throughout the years. They care, they fucking care, they help so many, i watch jake on twitch and if someone types in they need advice he will give them what he can, try to help but it will also say sometimes explain that he doesn’t know what to say an thats okay no one has the answer for everything, but he cares, CC cares i follow every site he’s on FB, Insta, Twitter, im in a shit ton of bvb fan groups. ive seen cc tweet a fan back if he has time, he apologized the other day for not being as active much, honestly they give us the time of day, its the fact that they even notice us when we are not looking to be. Jinxx cares, Ashley cares they are the kindest most down to earth souls.  if you got the wrong end of the stick with them, if they said something against you and your upset about what they said maybe think of what you did to cause that reaction, Do you notice the calm, Loving reaction that Fans get when they’re respectful to not only Them but to the Wives as well compared to the ones that just want to bash them?  I will love them, Respect them until the day I die because they haven’t done anything to me to cause me to think or do otherwise and nothing will change that.