*Peter dials number*
Peter: "Did you know spiders eat ants?"
Scott:
Scott:
Scott: "Okay I'm sorry I ate your Pop Tarts. Please don't hurt me"

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*Peter dials number*
Peter: "Did you know spiders eat ants?"
Scott:
Scott:
Scott: "Okay I'm sorry I ate your Pop Tarts. Please don't hurt me"

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Je bent zo gay als de hel.
:•)
SO ARE YOU, JESTER
31. behind the scenes
What did the Buggsleys saw that was so horrifying 🤔
@razzlefrazzum

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so Peter is 15 and it’s time to start learning to drive. Tony doesn’t want him learning from a professional driving school because he’s always worried about Peter’s safety, so he decides to teach him himself. Tony thinks driving is a good skill for living on earth, so he invites Thor to the lesson too. Thor goes first, and peter observes. Thor is very confused “you say this contraption has no capability of flight? On Asgard our vehicles-“ and he’s too confused about how to operate the car he has to quit. So then it’s Peter’s turn. Unfortunately tony talks to much and makes too many pop culture references that Peter doesn’t understand and changes the music too much that Peter is distracted and confused, and Thor’s presence stresses him out so he quits too.
Tony: “Well it’s for the best kid, if you don’t learn to drive, you‘ll never get in an accident”
Peter: “Mr. Stark no-“
What ends up happening is Natasha and Scott both volunteer to teach Peter. Nat because she wants more time with her spiderling and Scott because he’s just that nice. Nat’s a great teacher and whenever they’re out driving she’ll say random things like, “don’t run the red light like me in Constantinople when I almost caused three car crashes. Technically it was me being chased by the Turkey government for assassinating the prime minister that almost caused those three car crashes but I did run a lot of red lights” and Peter can never tell if she’s joking. Scott teaches when Nat needs a break and he’s a good teacher. He gets distracted talking about Cassie sometimes but Peter doesn’t mind. He also yells “Peter stop!” In a panicked voice every fifteen minutes, Peter screeches to a halt and goes “what, did I run over someone?” and Scott’s like “no you didn’t run someone over you almost ran Antwannette over, she was just trying to cross the street!”
Peter: “is antwannette an ant?“
Scott: “she was just trying to cross the street!”
Anyway Peter has a great time learning to drive with his avenger teachers and even though Tony’s pretty much his dad, he’s glad Tony didn’t end up teaching him to drive. Nat and Scott are much better teachers and Peter becomes bug bros with Scott and Nat becomes his spider mamma.
Peter:You know Uncle Scott when you’re tiny do you think one day you’ll get vored?
Scott: lol I got vored by a dog last week and then he spat me up...then the cat vored me
Tony: Hey whats vore mean?
Stephen: better yet just change the whole conversation entirely
Tony bug sprays the lab once and this is what happens:
Peter walks in and starts hissing then crawls away and Tony who was just minding his own buisness is so confused
Scott comes in with his new ant because he wants Tony to build it a saddle and the ant immediately dies then Scott just screams “BRY-ANT NO”
The billionaire soon realises that he can’t bug spray the lab anymore because his intern acts like a wild cat and innocent ants die when he does