#btb feedback

Because I am still here, I’m still reading BtB like a religious text, and I still adore every last word. I, much to my own surprise, loved reading from Hiashi’s pov in a previous chapter; I’m so here for the whole mess that’s Sasuke and the SasuNaru…maelstrom; I desperately want to see where Kiba and Ino end up, how they solve their current situation (if they solve their current situation), and how they heal, individually and potentially together.

Even more desperately: I want Shikamaru’s grief. I cannot describe how much I love reading these dreamscape flashbacks. Getting these small insights into the hidden life they got to live for a little while, it’s incredible. Even more so because we know how it ended. For now, hopefully. Shikamaru watching Naruto, but refusing to see who Naruto was holding… He knows, of course he knows, but like he said in an earlier chapter: they won’t let him grieve. I want his grief, every last ugly heartbreaking bit of it! If you were to write out the scene when Neji’s death caught up to him (cause I’m not sure the moment he died would necessarily be it), my god… I’d pay good money to read that, for real.

And, finally, Genma. I said it before and I’ll say it again, I don’t know how he’s still standing. I want to read when Kakashi first walked away. And I want to read every last letter of them, hopefully, finding their way back to each other. Genma deserved his eight times up. I at least want to see him get his ninth time realised.

Hey sweetie! 💜💖

Thank you so much for carving out the time to leave this message. I'll always reiterate how much it means to receive feedback. I appreciate you doing so. 💖

[...] In other cases I’ve been scared off by being told my reactions and interpretations were wrong, both by writers and other commenters

I'm sorry to hear you felt scared off by responses to your feedback, but I'd definitely encourage you to ignore that. Christ, some of the stuff I've been told about my writing, the tropes I use, the themes I explore...🤦🏻‍♀️ Not everyone's cuppa chai. Even if interpretations were 'wrong' so to speak, the fact that you're engaging with that storyline and the characters is fantastic. I'm sorry if your engagement hasn't been warmly received by writers in the past - I find that baffling and not representative of writers on the whole, who are invariably hungry for engagement and grateful to receive it unless it's a troll comment or angry flame. Gently guiding a reader who may have misunderstood something is different to completely blasting them out the water and if that's been the case for you, then that's rubbish and I hope that me telling you how much your feedback matters will encourage you to share your thoughts with writers you read. You matter. Your engagement matters. What you love matters, as it's invariably what we love too. I'm so grateful you're still here, luv. And I thank you for showing up for me.🫶🏼 💖

I, much to my own surprise, loved reading from Hiashi’s pov in a previous chapter; I’m so here for the whole mess that’s Sasuke and the SasuNaru…maelstrom; I desperately want to see where Kiba and Ino end up, how they solve their current situation (if they solve their current situation), and how they heal, individually and potentially together.

So lovely to know you enjoyed reading from Hiashi's POV. I feel that there's room for a lot of nuance where Hiashi is concerned, rather than him being portrayed as a black-and-white, cold-hearted dinosaur for not changing the Hyūga clan. Digging into his brain (and chest cavity) was a must.

Kiba and Ino 🫶🏼😔

SasuNaru: Watch this space 😏

Even more desperately: I want Shikamaru’s grief. I cannot describe how much I love reading these dreamscape flashbacks. Getting these small insights into the hidden life they got to live for a little while, it’s incredible. Even more so because we know how it ended. For now, hopefully. Shikamaru watching Naruto, but refusing to see who Naruto was holding… He knows, of course he knows, but like he said in an earlier chapter: they won’t let him grieve. I want his grief, every last ugly heartbreaking bit of it!

Oddly enough, Shikamaru wants his grief too. And I'm on what emotional whumpster ride with you. *grabs medicinal liquids*

Funny how HHU began as another of my failed attempts to write a series of one-shots (BtB flashfowards/flashbacks) that just ended up as a timeline skip continuation of the BtB series....my point being the little flashbacks are good fun to write, and might've originally been posted as one-shots (if I wasn't so shit at them). I'm glad you're enjoying these memories.

If you were to write out the scene when Neji’s death caught up to him (cause I’m not sure the moment he died would necessarily be it), my god… I’d pay good money to read that, for real.

Ah damn, I'd need my Angsta guns locked and loaded for that. Ha! Aw. I'd also happily receive said good money to write it too, if only that were legal. 🤣

And, finally, Genma. I said it before and I’ll say it again, I don’t know how he’s still standing. I want to read when Kakashi first walked away. And I want to read every last letter of them, hopefully, finding their way back to each other. Genma deserved his eight times up. I at least want to see him get his ninth time realised.

Ah, Dearly Tortured Genma. 🥹💖 He's been through the absolute wringer. Kakashi walking away was a serious KO to his heart. Damn right you are, Genma definitely deserved his eight times up and I adore that you are invested in him having his "ninth time realised" (love that). I fully support this sentiment. Thankfully so does Raido, or else Genma might've been alone in the fallout...but credit where it's due, he's a tough bastard.

Hey there, Anon!

No worries at all, luv, we all have our abandoned haunts lurking on the internet. I'm just thankful Tumblr allows for me to hear from and respond to you. 💜💜

just wanted to say i found the BTB fic many years ago and come back to it every so often when i want a good cry (and because i love it so much).

AW! Thank you, my luv, that's so sweet and awesome to know. 🥰 I'm so moved to hear that the series has touched you and that you return to it for a good cry (yes, I know, I sound sadistic every bloody time *facepalms*). Seriously, I'm so chuffed to hear this.

i just finished my hundredth-reread of the original BTB fic and am about to start on the second one.

GODSPEED, ANON, GODSPEED! 🥰

imagine my surprise to see you are still writing for this series and had published a new chapter in the BTB-verse like a week ago!

You felt a disturbance in the force, my dear. Honestly, I had no idea it was going to happen until it was happening...thank you for still revisiting the series; amazing that you could catch this latest streak of insanity whislt doing so! 😉😅

thank you so much for being such a pillar for us shikaneji lovers <3

as a reader and a writer, the way you build your scenes always amazes me. you have all these characters, all of them with their own past and their own motives, interacting with each other in these intricate political and emotional dances, and you manage to show us through dialogue and gestures the layered complexity of their inner and outer reality. hibiki and genma's conversation in particular was so good!!!

thank you so much, sending you love and a giant hug ♥

Hello, my dear @god-of-dust 💜!

How beautiful to hear from you, luv! Such a joy to get your message. Thank you for the immense support of taking out that time to write to me. My appreciation is all up in your energy right now. 💜💜!

I'm not only touched by your feedback, but both spurred and reassured. But more than anything, I'm just so damn happy you enjoy the scenes...you hit the emotional nail right on the head for me when you mentioned the characters...oh gods, the characters are EVERYTHING. Their layers are everything. And I am a fuzzy fizzy fluffy fangirling mess myself over my readers (seriously, the appreciation runneth over so hard) when they enjoy the character interaction and dynamics, which are undoubtedly my most favourite part to write (or witness, as I watch them go about their crazy business and run around after them like some medieval bard or scribe, writing down the madness as it unfolds). You guys let me know I've captured something that matters to you and when you let me know what that is, I feel the joy of being a reader myself, as well as a writer, and also, a fan of the characters. It's this awesome, indescribable cycle of beautiful energy and that connection lives on the kindness of the readers giving their feedback - so THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. 💜💜💜

Or rather, I hope I give you entertainment and you give me the energy back like a nuclear power plant imbuing me with some of the big radioactive stuff (not the legit crap that kills you - oh dear, Rayne), but the metaphorical stuff that turns you into some kind of MARVEL/DC individual whose superpower is to be able to see and hear people talking and walking about the screen in their head (psychiatrist would have a field day with this) and then be able to conceptualise wtf is going on by putting that into words.

Is that a superpower or schizophrenia? 😅😅 As a fellow writer, would you agree that's between us and our maker, right? 😉 Right'O.

Thank you again, my lovely, for being so bloody awesome to reach out with this message. 🫶🏼

I recently started my annual BtB read-through (something about spring makes me think of love and these boys and brings me back every time)and even though I've never really sent anyone an ask before on account of crushing social anxiety, I just felt I had to reach out to you today and let you know how important this story and your writing in particular are to me.

I learned recently about aphantasia and that I have it. Bad. So bad that I truly can't picture anything in my mind at all. I can't even recall a vague image of the room I'm in when I close my eyes. When I read, it's all just words and feelings which is perfectly fine but if a book is too flowery, or to vague, I simply get confused and lose all interest.

Which is why this fic has stuck with me so hard. Your writing makes sense, to me. It's so concise, so clear, and so emotive that sometimes I actually feel like I can almost picture the scenes I'm reading.

There's a particular moment in chapter 13, right before they kiss, that's written just so perfectly that even though it's brief (it's literally one sentence)I feel like I really can see it. It's in my head and I can just barely visualize it and, I mean, it's like seeing colour for the first time. It made me cry, even though it really isn't a sad scene at all lol. I was just overcome with emotion at the thought that I might actually be able to visualize something, even if it's only a tiny, tiny flash.

So anyway, I'm rambling but I just wanted to thank you for this story, and for letting me have this emotional little moment. And also to let you know that in a little way, you've changed my life. It's meant the world to me,so thank you. ❤️

Hello there, sweet Anon!

Oh my luv...there’s so much that welled up inside of me whilst reading your message, I don’t even know where to begin.  

Firstly, let me thank you for so kindly taking the time and the courage to message me despite the crushing anxiety.  I am always so deeply grateful for those who cross language barriers, leap social anxiety hurdles, and any other personal frontiers, and make that move to reach out.  I appreciate how uncomfortable and nerve-wracking that can be and I thank you so much for stepping out so I can see you, and acknowledge you, and process what you shared...

And damn...what you shared.... ❤️

It physically pains me that I feel I don’t have the words in my limited language (I’m certain other tongues have far more superior ways of describing the sentiment I want to express to readers at times)...but when I say that my British composure was shot to burning hell reading what you shared, I hope that this communicates the gravity of your message’s impact. I am humbled beyond words by such personal responses...and at the risk of a restraining order being taken out on me (and potential jail time, not to be ruled out) I’d be handing out a giant bone-rending hug in an attempt to demonstrate what words fail to convey when my mind and my heart are floored this way...this way I can’t seem to describe.

I’ve said this before and I will never stop saying it -- but these kinds of exchanges...this understanding of someone else’s story being made a little lighter by their choice to take a chance on my work and madness...these kinds of messages...they change my life too. And not in small ways. They’re the reason I keep wanting to tell stories, even if that feels impossible whilst in burnout. Having felt like I’ve temporarily lost my way, I want you to know that this, right here, this connection and hard-hitting exchange with a reader reaching out like you’re doing? Letting me know how the work has given you something to lift you or move you in some small or significant way? What that offers me in return? What that means to me? There aren’t words for this kind of exchange, Anon. ❤️ 

I cried. Again. As I knew it would. God I love this story so much. It lives in my heart like a parasite in text form 💜 I love these two and how you portray them. It's so real. It's so raw. Im Always so impressed with how you write this, I forget it's fiction. Every character feels so real and dynamic and like they have so many layers to them. They're sometimes emotional, irrational, imperfect... I'm obsessed.

Also the foreshadowing?? Hello. The mention of Kitori being kind of DID hit me like one of Neji's punches with the knowledge of what comes next. And the hints at something having happened to Shikamaru. Knowing what it is is just. Ouch. Ow. Painful. I'm so impressed with how early it's all mentioned and hinted at and how it's all so very connected.

Also the names????? The titles???? They're so good??? Ive been pondering about the titles and noticed just how many scenes come to mind with the titles. Especially for Under These Scars but also the rest. It's so good and so impressive especially with how short the titles are.

I'm ngl I'm a bit scared to get to UTS. I love it and I love Genma and Kakashi and seeing more of them but. Ugh. The hurt!!! 😭 Especially with Naoki. And Karibi. And Shikamarus experiences. My poor heart. Atleast there's the comfort to soothe over it. (As long as I ignore everything in HHU. 😌 Theres no war in Ba Sing Se Konoha and they live happily ever after.) Man I'm so glad to have found your works, they really do make me Feel so much.

I hope you're doing goodie and that your teas are good 💜🍵

Aww! Hey there @sunlightrays! 🤗💜

Ah, Sunny! How lovely to see your name pop up in my inbox, sweetie.  I hope you’re doing well and life is treating you kindly? Ah!  I did a little jig after reading your message 🥹.  Always so lovely to hear that you've strapped yourself in for another ride through the BtB carnival of crazy.  I hope you enjoy your next stop at OtC!

I cried. Again. As I knew it would. God I love this story so much. It lives in my heart like a parasite in text form 💜

I am swiftly running out of ways to express how it feels to know this, Sunny.  I’ve joked about this before but I’m starting to seriously consider choreographing an entire performance at this rate to express myself through interpretive dance.  

It won’t be pretty.  But it’ll be honest. 

Seriously though, I’m warmed through-and-through to know BtB still moves you.  Thank you for returning to the series. 🤗

I love these two and how you portray them. It’s so real. It’s so raw. Im Always so impressed with how you write this, I forget it’s fiction. Every character feels so real and dynamic and like they have so many layers to them. They’re sometimes emotional, irrational, imperfect... I’m obsessed.

Aw, luv.  I will always stress that the characters are the absolute lifeblood of the stories I write, so it bears repeating that I am always hit on multiple levels by the impact of readers enjoying their portrayals.  I love that you enjoy those layers.  Thanks for returning to invest in them once again!

Also the foreshadowing?? Hello. The mention of Kitori being kind of DID hit me like one of Neji's punches with the knowledge of what comes next. And the hints at something having happened to Shikamaru. Knowing what it is is just. Ouch. Ow. Painful. I'm so impressed with how early it's all mentioned and hinted at and how it's all so very connected.

Oh, bless you.  Thank you.  Some of those parallels were planned and some unfolded in such an organic way it felt magical. I remember thinking “oh boy, there’s a whole other story here with Shikamaru.”  Little did I know it would snowball into something as huge as UtS.

Also the names????? The titles???? They're so good??? Ive been pondering about the titles and noticed just how many scenes come to mind with the titles. Especially for Under These Scars but also the rest. It's so good and so impressive especially with how short the titles are.

Thank you, Sunny.  That means a lot to me given how uniquely frustrated I get when it comes to finding the right titles…to be fair, I’m the same with character names (obviously that’s in relation to OCs, as I don’t have to worry about that with Kishimoto’s characters). It’s got to sit right, you know? Encompass enough of the story etc.  I get very nit picky!

I'm ngl I'm a bit scared to get to UTS.

I’m ngl I was scared to write it, luv. 😂

I love it and I love Genma and Kakashi and seeing more of them but. Ugh. The hurt!!! 😭 Especially with Naoki. And Karibi. And Shikamarus experiences. My poor heart. Atleast there’s the comfort to soothe over it. (As long as I ignore everything in HHU. 😌 Theres no war in Ba Sing Se Konoha and they live happily ever after.)

Aw! Sunny, you hardcore angster you! God. You know I adore and appreciate your love for Naoki and Karibi and for Genma’s storyline. And I feel you, I do. HHU does not start on a happy note. 😭

Man I’m so glad to have found your works, they really do make me Feel so much. I hope you're doing goodie and that your teas are good 💜🍵

🥰 Thank you, Sunny.  I wish I could find new ways to express the gratitude I feel.  I love that you can return to the BtB world and still feel the feels.  Knowing that makes the BtB labour of love worth the long-haul insanity I put in. It makes such a difference in my world—so thank you, so much.

Ah, yes luv, my teas are keeping me marginally tethered.  

Hi there, sweetie,

Firstly, THANK YOU for revisiting the series! Secondly, thank you for revisiting it with such an open approach, getting something (hopefully) different from the story with each read-through. That's beautiful. I hope it always provides that for you whenever you step back into it. If it can in any way provide that, then wow...that's one more reason why it was worth the long-haul investment.

I've been meaning to write for a long time, to be honest, but, first of all, I'm shy (._.) and, as I've previously mentioned, I'm extremely concerned that it will be a bother. And secondly, I wanted to provide a substantial update on our work.

Today I can kind of give you one since we just published the 10th chapter of the translation! Woo-hoo! It was a long (but extremely exciting) journey. Took longer than I would have preferred, but boring adult jobs and deteriorating mental health were quite the obstacles. We continue the work though since we enjoy it quite a lot and currently, it's personally my favourite hobby. It's so much fun (especially translating the curses, you have no idea. Ukrainian obscenities are much more flowery and diverse than the English ones (sorry but it's the reality xD). We have nothing on Italians, though), I wish I could've expressed it properly, but I'm unfortunately not a very eloquent person (which is hilarious since currently, I'm writing a work of my own. Oh the irony).

The thing is that Ukrainian is not the first language of anyone on our team (We have a team, can you imagine? I'm the translator, and we also have two editors and two beta-readers. Bonkers, but very cool, in my opinion). I know it sounds weird, but all of us are from Eastern Ukraine and it was russified quite intensely for the last (oh, God) 200 years of something. I'm not gonna give you a boring and unnecessary lecture on the history of Ukraine, but the gist is that the Ukrainian language was prohibited more the 130 times. The russian empire first, then the USSR second tried to eradicate it as hard as they could. They failed, thankfully, but the consequences are still there and we still try to undo the damage. Since the beginning of the war in the East and then the full-scale invasion we kind of try to ukrainify (is this a word? I think not, but maybe it should be) everything that is possible and not. So if before 2022 I briefly considered an idea to translate your amazing work to russian (my first language) then after the invasion started I decided to not contribute to the problem of the oppression of the Ukrainian language in Ukraine. That's why I translate your work into Ukrainian instead (as a matter of fact, many fanfiction authors here deleted their works in russian and translated them into Ukrainian).

I know it may raise some concerns that no one in our team is a native Ukrainian speaker, but worry not: we are kinda good ;) And also that is partly the reason why the team grew to become so big.

I really don't know why you may be interested in all of this but I kinda wanted to share. Hope you don't mind too much.

Now to the exciting part. Most of our friends LOVE your work. Some of them (the ones who know English) even read the source material — not the translation — that's how intrigued they were (and completely in love, but you didn't hear it from me). So you can better understand the impact your work has, some facts: a couple of people, who didn't even read/watch Naruto (like, ever), are so enamored that they are considering actually getting acquainted with the source material. One girl started rewatching the whole thing even though it's not her preferred fandom choice. Almost all of the guys (who NEVER read fanfiction because they — the guys I mean — are boring human beings) in our friend group read at least a couple of chapters and loved your writing a ton. I hope this will lift your spirits at least for a bit :3

I will try to keep you updated on our progress, but, to be honest, I don't really know when it is appropriate to write to you. The only thing I can say for sure is that I'm dreading the appearance of the Hyuga headbutt since I already wrack my brain on how to translate it properly xD

Sending you all the love, have a great day~

Hello, dearest @demonofkarma!

Thank you for your patience as I finally respond to this incredible message. Let me start by reassuring you that it is never, nor shall it ever be, a bother to hear from you.  It's such a pleasure to receive your message.  Thank you for braving your shyness. I know that’s not always easy. As an extremely introverted person myself, I get it. Please know my goal will always be to set you at ease whenever you choose to reach out.💜

I’ve got to say, it took some time to scrape together the scattered pieces of my mind-blown brain after reading your message. First, I had to process the fact that you took the time out of your busy life to paint me such a vivid picture of the incredible activities going on behind the scenes of your translation effort. Reading about your brilliant cast of real-life characters involved in this translation project honest to gods set me back on my heels…

The lengths you’ve all gone to…during such a painful, heavy, and demanding chapter in your country’s story…that isn't lost on me....even though I'm lost for appropriate words. Just the thought of all the time you guys have invested, the love, the attention to detail, and the deeply moving allegiance you’ve sworn to the Ukrainian language, especially in light of the horrific war and the events that pre-dated it; I appreciate the historical context you provided.  Holy hell, of course, of course you’d want to preserve the language and revive it…gosh, the fact that you wield so many languages is beyond impressive. I struggle enough with just my bloody native tongue (American pronunciations and spelling vs. British drive me nuts at times - which is crying-bitch-level weak compared to the brilliance of translators and those who cross language barriers in so many forms, whether written or spoken)! Huge respect to you and your fabulous team and to the poignant story behind your translation.  Honestly, I’m quite taken aback by what you've shared with me. 💜

I know it may raise some concerns that no one in our team is a native Ukrainian speaker, but worry not: we are kinda good ;) And also that is partly the reason why the team grew to become so big.  I really don't know why you may be interested in all of this but I kinda wanted to share. Hope you don't mind too much.

Please believe me when I tell you that I’m not concerned in the slightest, as this is clearly something you feel very passionately about. That passion, combined with your team’s efforts, leave me in no doubt you guys know exactly what you’re doing – I’m just so bloody honoured you’d dedicate that beautiful effort to the BtB story. That’s out of this world. Thank you.  God, it takes on a whole new dimension knowing what you’ve invested in it and WHY. Thank you for giving me a window into your world.  For explaining the significance, the sentiment, and the super amazing players involved behind the scenes – please extend my thanks. I'm pretty lost for words over here…speaking of which…

It's so much fun (especially translating the curses, you have no idea. Ukrainian obscenities are much more flowery and diverse than the English ones (sorry but it's the reality xD). We have nothing on Italians, though),

This made me laugh out loud.  I don’t doubt it for second, my dear. As for the Italians. They've got us all beat. Doesn't help that they combine insults with emphatic gesticulations. Their hands communicate their meaning faster than Google Translate ever could. It's a beautiful thing. 🤣

Now to the exciting part. Most of our friends LOVE your work. Some of them (the ones who know English) even read the source material — not the translation — that's how intrigued they were (and completely in love, but you didn't hear it from me).

…I don’t have words to express what’s going on behind my ribs whilst reading this…

So you can better understand the impact your work has, some facts: a couple of people, who didn't even read/watch Naruto (like, ever), are so enamored that they are considering actually getting acquainted with the source material. One girl started rewatching the whole thing even though it's not her preferred fandom choice. Almost all of the guys (who NEVER read fanfiction because they — the guys I mean — are boring human beings) in our friend group read at least a couple of chapters and loved your writing a ton

Coherence has left the chat; transcendental joy has entered. I’m pretty sure I could levitate into restricted airspace, get shot down, and not feel a goddamn thing because I’m arse-over-tits high on the good feels. I’m so bloody grateful, I can’t even begin to tell you.

Thank you for sharing this. You said you hoped this would lift my spirits? Sweetheart – your mission has been accomplished. You get a distinction award.

I will try to keep you updated on our progress, but, to be honest, I don't really know when it is appropriate to write to you. The only thing I can say for sure is that I'm dreading the appearance of the Hyuga headbutt since I already wrack my brain on how to translate it properly xD

Ah, my lovely. You can write to me whenever you wish or are able to, in your own time. There’s absolutely no pressure from my end, just a whole lotta love and appreciation. I will be re-reading this message and keeping it close – not being figurative, I print and keep them. As for translating the Hyūga Headbutt…Godspeed, my dear. 😅I have no powers in the realm of translation and can only look on in amazement and admiration at those who have been gifted with that kind of word-alchemy. Massive respect to you and your team.

This response doesn’t do justice to how profoundly touched I was by your message.  I hope you can trust me when I tell you that I was genuinely moved. Again, I’m not being figurative. Things got rearranged inside me. You took me to a higher altitude, had me observing the significance of why my writer’s heart continues to beat, especially in those moments when I’m afraid it’s flatlined. This is the best defibrillating experience...uh,I appreciate that’s a pretty fucked up metaphor, but it’s visceral and raw…as a lot of life-giving blessings are. I send you my whole-hearted thanks. 💗🤗💗

You’d mentioned deteriorating mental health…I’m not certain if you were referring to yourself explicitly, certain members in your team, or perhaps all of you, collectively. Whatever the case may be here, please know I’m wishing whoever is suffering the kind of wholesome recovery that’s needed to restore both mind and spirit. 💗

You also mentioned that you are writing a work of your own and to this I say, may the muses light upon your shoulders and the wellspring of creativity and inspiration runneth over!!

Stay safe, sweetheart.