#bruce johnson

the beach boys were originally called the pendletones!! they made it their name in reference to the pendleton shirts they planned to wear while performing and in hopes that they would be gifted free shirts. the name was sort of like the beatles (a misspelling of a different word to be more musical). also, the name was changed to the beach boys without any of the band members knowing!! they had only found out after the change had been made

A crack fic written in 27 (ish) minutes and I don’t know much about the beach boys and I only have my sister for help (who does not know them either)

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Once upon a time, Brian Wilson woke up and said to himself: “Wow I would like to go to the beach today uwu!” He jumped off his bed (which was shaped like a bed) and onto his brothers, Dennis and Carl.

“I have an important announcement!” he announced.

“What is it big bro?” asked Carl, as if he was a book character written by someone who didn’t have any siblings. “Did Al dye his hair orange?? :O”

“I was having a nice dream. It better be important,” said Dennis.

“It is berry important, little bros,” said Brian, as if he was a book character written by someone who didn’t have any siblings. “So important that Mike Love, who is our cousin,” he added for some context. “Is coming into our room using the medium of Al Jardine.”

At that berry moment, Mike Love jumped into the bathroom window (oh no wrong band) holding Al Jardine by the foot. “Henlo, cousins,” he said. “I have heard that you have announced some important announcements that are so important that I came into your room through the bathroom window.” He heard Sir James Paul McCartney scream as if he was dying.

“LMAO” said Al Jardine. His name was Alan but he changed it to Al for Alabama.

“I want to go to the beach,” said Brian Wilson.

“Omg same,” said Carl.

“Wot I wanted to the cinema,” said Dennis, being the odd one out (again)

“I don’t care, little brother,” said both Wilsons.

“But Carl, little brother, you are younger than me.”

“STFU” said Michael Edward Love, already in beach gear. “I am beach body ready.”

“Wow same,” said Alabama Jardinia, who too was in beach gear.

“Us too,” said the other Wilsons, except Dennis (who got left out again)

Suddenly, Bruce Johnson appeared out of nowhere….”Can I join you too??”

“No,” they all said at once (even Dennis, who was not being left out for once). “You come in later.”

“SaD emOji” uttered Bruce Johnson as he left through the door

“Let us go to the beach :D” said the boys of the beach and the scene cut to them in the beach boy mobile.

“Zoooooooooooooooooom!!!” said the car. But suddenly a car crash with the beatles in the beatle mobile (Brian Epstein’s car).

“Oi clods wot are yah doin,” said the British insects.

“This is your problem >:O” said the beachiest boys.

Suddenly, Roger Meddows Taylor’s falsetto rang in their ears. OH NO. He was singing I’m in love with my car! The rest of the Queenie Boys were covering their ears except John Richard Deacon born August the nineteenth, nineteen fifty won, who was covering his Cheese On ToastTM’s non-existent ears full stop

They crashed into them (and also the Monkees who magically appeared there too (poor Peter Halsen Dorkelson was crying)) :(((((((((((( PERiDoT EXclamaTion Mark saD EMOJI

“OH NO” said the sand children. “We will never go to the beach Sad Emoji”)

Suddenly, Doctor Who (Pete Townshed!) appeared in his tardis and said “Yall can go to the cinema HaPpY eMoJI. But then he was venusian akidoed out by the fourth doctor played by Tom Baker.

“Go away >:O” said the fourth doctor played by Thomas Baker as he zoomed away in his Tardis.

“OH NO sAD emOji!!” said all of them.

“Oh hey we can go to the cinema HapPy eMoJi uwu!!” said Dennis Wilson, finally fulfilling his dreams.

“No little bro,” said Brian Wilson.

“No big bro,” said Carl Wilson.

“No, cousin,” said Mikaka Liek

“No, budye,” said Alberta Canada.

“No fellow classic rock band person,” said the others.

“The cinema is closed EXCLAMATION MARK” said all of them at once as a crowd of people came in to watch the Sonic Movie (2020).

“And George Harrison has already eaten David Tennnant who was walking by just now,” said John Lennon, world famous guitarist most notably the rhythm guitarist of the Beatles.

“Let’s ALL GO ICE SKATING!!!!!!!!!!!!!” said all of them, leaving out Dennis Wilson. They all drove away with their broken cars (except for the monkees because Micky Dolenz of the monkees could not start the engine SAD EmoJI). *Fade to black*

The ENd

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Actually wait this whole scene is a thing on it’s own

Joan: Me taking a risk, or me using logic against you?

The Saga of Caroline Settino and Bruce Johnson In the summer of 2016, Caroline Settino’s life took an unexpected turn when she crossed paths with Bruce Johnson. Their initial meeting sparked a whirlwind romance characterized by extravagant gestures and lavish experiences. Mr. Johnson whisked Ms. Settino away on lavish trips to enchanting locations like Italy and the idyllic Virgin Islands,…

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