#britney rambles

So anyway, as anyone who saw my most recent selfie ( you can find it in #thisismyselfietag) would know, I finally cut my hair! I’d been wanting to do it for a while, trust me, ask any of my friends about this one, and I came to the realisation the other day that the only reason I hadn’t done it earlier was because of what I thought other people would think of me. Like I was super worried that people would see me differently from who I was (and still am) with my long hair, because to be real, my personality hasn’t changed in the days after cutting my hair nor have I become a different person. I was so worried that I wouldn’t fit society’s ideals of “femininity” because I was always told growing up that girls had long hair and if I wore something a certain way of did something different that I looked like a boy. I mean the day I came home with my new hair my mum immediately told me that I looked like a boy but like what does that even mean? Do I now look like society’s ideals for “masculinity”? the answer to that is well, no but do I look stereotypically ‘feminine’ now? Also, no and that doesn’t matter. Coming to terms with my gender is a journey and it’s not an easy one at that, I’m not too sure where I sit on the spectrum at the moment and for now non-binary is where I’m at, I’m also trying out they/them pronouns to see how they sit with me because for the past 18 years I’ve had she/her and they never really sat right with me. I’ve started doing things for me now to make me feel more comfortable with who I am, it started slowly, like no longer wearing dresses because they made me uncomfortable, (guys real talk, I used to wear dresses and heels at least once a week because I thought that’s what people wanted from me and it was so uncomfortable??) it then went to embracing she/they pronouns to slowly sink into it before ‘committing’ to they/them and I finally did the one thing that I wanted to do so much to help me feel more like me, and that’s cutting my hair. It’s liberating really, like I finally did something for me without worrying about what anyone else would think. This one’s for me and becoming un-apologetically me. So, Hello, I’m Britney, I’m 18, I’m a gay, non-binary human who uses they/them pronouns and I finally cut my hair.