#bonyardintro

TLDR; sophia escaped a religious cult in her twenties thanks to a few brave people in her life that in turn made her brave enough to commit to leaving. she went to school out of state, completed her masters in vegas, and after years as a case manager was hired as a counselor at Horizons. she's sweet, sensitive, and often still feels like an alien walking amongst people since she missed out on a lot of milestones and socialization in her formative years. currently she moonlights as a dancer at Glitter Gulch to feel less embarrassed and shameful about sex, to empower herself, and if she's being honest the extra money is nice to pay those student loans. in her free time she likes to go out with friends/colleagues and perform karaoke, play her guitar, bake, and tend to her plants.

quick stats:

+ favorite color is orange + go to karaoke songs are Waiting Room by Phoebe Bridgers, Breathe by Michelle Branch, My Friends Over You by NFG, and Nothing Really Matters by Jaedynn Latter but she does take requests + has a borzoi named Zoinks that is trained as a therapy dog + loves to cook from scratch

the full bio:

tw: cult antics, leaving a cult, religious trauma, manipulation

+ silver spoon, golden rule, private school, never missed sunday church— it was always expected that Sophia would follow the church, marry young, pop out babies, and serve the community as a dutiful woman. As one who would keep the family tradition alive. The youngest and only girl of the family, she was her mother and fathers hope to stay in the good graces of their community leader.

+ she is twelve years old when she has her first meeting with the community matriarch. they discuss her interests, her disdain of having the bathrooms as her chore when she'd much rather tend to the garden, what books she's been reading, her crush on Josh Reyes, the boy a grade ahead of her. at her second meeting, they discuss the whispers she hears about their church being a cult, about their leaders preying on the weak and desperate, about the terrible things that happen those who try to leave. sophia is afraid of hell. she's afraid of not serving her purpose and losing her family when they ascend. when soph begins to cry as she expresses her guilt, her shame, her confessions of sinful thoughts such as a life outside of the church, she notices something change in the elder. the woman, face normally soft and welcoming, turned into one soph would recognize years later as guilt. as her own shame.

+ at 16 she is being primmed and curated to attract her future husband. she isn't ready to be married. it's a confession she keeps to herself because she doesn't want to upset the matriarch, especially not after her transgression years ago. the boys her age are also gross and are only interested in marriage so they can be handsy. it isn't until her senior year of high school she finds a friend that isn't part of the church. a girl in her grade that's artsy, is allowed to be friends with boys, wears what she wants and asks sophia to braid her hair before PE. they sneak away when sophia is supposed to be at an extra study group that doesn't exist, but is instead spending time at the local coffee shop with aries and her friends. on a day they're alone, she confesses all of her fears. her worries. her sadness. her dreams. she cries and aries lets her. listens. and more importantly, she doesn't judge. she doesn't tell sophia her dreams are a waste, she doesn't tell her she is meant to fulfill the duty put upon her, she doesn't tell her the group she's been in her entire life is a cult. instead, she hugs her. she asks 'how can i help you?'

+ it takes awhile, aries leaves for college and sophia goes out of her way to not marry. she sneaks birth control. she commits sin by lying about why she can't marry. she hides letters from aries until one day she's caught by one of the male leaders of the group. they scream at her. drag her across the community garden and throw her into the churches confessional chamber— a dank and old confessional booth in the basement that can only be opened from the outside. she's left there for hours, sobbing, begging, praying for forgiveness. in a twist, it's her mother that saves her.

+ cecilia was a devout woman to the group, though over the years of watching young girls like her daughter, like she once was, fall into a life that they're not deserving of, having their dreams crushed, she figured it might be too late for her, but it's not for sophia. a backpack of clothes, a final letter from aries, and some money for a bus pass, she and another mother that recently lost her daughter rescue her from the basement and take her to the edge of their commune in the cloak of night. it is the last time she sees or hears from her mother.

+ another surprise? it's aries' father that is picking her up. the truck rumbles off down the dirt path that she once walked to school and hadn't seen for three years. she cries. she sobs. she sleeps for seventeen hours straight. when she wakes, the sun is shining, there is the smell of coffee and cinnamon, and as her daze lifts, she hears the voice of her friend. sophia carefully walked from the room, afraid of what awaited her on the other side of the door, but became overwhelmed at the sight of aries and her parents having breakfast. her new life started with cinnamon rolls, a hug, and a church free sunday morning.

+ she'd be lying if she said it was easy leaving the cult. that it was easy admitting she'd even been part of one. years of not being a part of society and being told her most normal thoughts were sinful and she'd be punished, sophia struggled to integrate at first. she missed her parents and her brothers. she missed her women's group and the community. sophia eventually sought help. she got on food stamps and medicaid, she entered therapy, and eventually her and arie's got an apartment together, sophia even started community college.

+ it was a long road, but she did eventually feel somewhat like she belonged. the loneliness and depression lifted. she started to explore who she was as a person in her twenties. she came to terms with the fact she was part of a cult and those she cared for deeply were still in it. arie's introduced her to friends that she's still in contact with today. they'd stay up late discussing the past, waxing poetic about the future, their take on current politics and what it actually means to be human. topics that seemed to evade her sometimes but the patience she was met with most of the time allowed her to continue growing.

+ all good things come to an end. arie's and her boyfriend decided to move in together, and sophia began her masters degree in Las Vegas. arie's went on to marry, and sophia went on to graduate and start her first job as a case manager, then eventually became hired at Horizons Psychiatric Institution. she loves what she does. she finds it rewarding helping others and seeing them through one of the worst times of their lives. her ability to sympathize and empathize takes her a long way with patients and she exceeds.

+ so why does she moonlight? it started as a way to explore the topic that had always made her feel odd— sex. despite all her work, being touched was difficult for her. boyfriends had come and gone due to her lack of reciprocating affection. it just didn't come naturally, it always felt like a performance that she just wasn't winning. she sought help from a sex therapist along with her own therapist. she took pole classes and burlesque classes to try and get in touch with her own body. one of the dancers in her pole class thought she was a natural and told her there was an opening at Glitter Gulch. on a whim, to be brave like the dancers in her class, she auditioned and now rents a spot twice a week or works as a shot girl for the club. the skimpy outfits, the ability to say who does and doesn't get her time makes her feel empowered. it's her own version of exposure therapy to feel less guilt and shame about sex and sexuality, about her own desires and wants. she just hopes no one in her professional life catches her.