#bondistarter

"I'm not completely sure how I ended up here last night but thanks for being the only one out of a million people I probably drunk text last night....and for letting me crash here."

Got home from work to a note on the door and it states, verbatim: If you assholes don’t stop blaring your music at half past three in the fucking morning, I’m calling the police. Bet.

I did a rather naughty thing just now....but listen, it was an accident, okay? I didn’t have enough butter to make my cookies so I used some of my brother’s pot butter thinking like, oh! A little bit won’t hurt… I just won’t eat a lot, it’s fine… I’ll let you in on a little secret there, friends.... it’s not fine. The room is spinning and I’m on my third ice cream bar....all because of a single cookie! That’s messed up.

❝ I remember when staying up for days on end as a kid was not only the easiest feat to pull off but made you feel like a SUPERHERO afterwards and gave you instant cool kid cred for at least a month but let me tell you —  after I got off Monday morning? I came home and tried to set an alarm with my calculator, cried ‘bout it and immediately passed out. I then slept for fifteen straight hours and yet still feel way too exhausted to go in tonight. It pains me to admit it but childhood is gone. Long, long gone.  ❞

People are arriving!

I tried to watch American Horror Story but it stays true to its name. It's soooo scary.

Right... someone come and give me cuddles please?

If Zen gets me sick I think I may rip his balls off!!!