thought about how beautifully ouas coalecroux played out and just how sweet and lovely it all was and started crying while making eggs good morning
middle-age married men confronting demons of their past together and having no few arguments along the way but always always returning to their love for each other and protecting each other and quietly living their best life? im so SICK
and like. zero ambiguity in it. it was pretty fucking unambiguous by ep 3 with back tickles but making it utterly clear in the finale just. happy fucking pride i love everyone in this nightclub. love it love me
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unwell as everyone about Kremy smugly getting his gigantic boar bear husband to carry him to bed where everyone can see but
(pt1)
I also loved all the tinier ways Kremy was essentially peeling back the millions of thin layers of armor he keeps up around their relationship
it often seems like kremy's the one more outwardly enamored, getting jealous of people like henri flirting with gideon, etc (and certainly I imagine a lot of us carry over the ways that's even more the case in OUaW) while gideon's love (in both OUaS and OUaW) almost exclusively takes the form of acts of service with almost NOTHING ever being stated out loud
but here we have Kremy dancing directly with him like it's something he would usually hold back from, Kremy acting dismayed that Gideon put his Huckleberry nickname for him on blast (HELLO???)
and it makes sense that Kremy, paranoid, secretive to everyone's detriment, untrusting, smothering down every hint of his life before the Undercity, would go to absurd lengths to never publicly acknowledge what he and Gideon are even when it's blatantly obvious to the starlight crew at very least that he and Gideon share the same 1-bedroom apartment above the lounge, that Kremy insists on 2 suites at the fancy topside hotel when 1 is more than big enough for the whole crew (icr if it's ever explicitly stated that Krem and Gid sleep in the 1 while the rest sleep in the other but cmon), and everyone knows enough that you have mob bosses threatening Kremy's "Man"
and I just love that this is all happening while Gideon is relentlessly roasting him for not having the slightest clue who the fuck the dead hellhounds were he's supposedly mourning because the whole conversation is Actually about how deeply they know each other despite Kremy's deception and withholding of his past and Gideon systematically dismantling that, not because he cares who Kremy was in the sense of it changing anything about who they are now, but purely in the sense of gathering every bit of information he can to protect Kremy and everyone NOW
idk it's just simultaneously so much more intimate and romantic and satisfying than if they'd just kissed or something
(and at the table Richie breaking the 4th wall to give us all the smuggest shittiest grin as Gideon carried Kremy away like. yall thought huckleberry went hard? hold my 9% ABV crispy, let's see you blow up ao3 even more. AND YOU KNOW WHAT MAYBE I WILL MAYBE I JUST WILL)
(pt2)
HELLO WHY ARE WE NOT TALKING MORE ABOUT THE FACT THAT KREMY APPARENTLY ALSO CALLS GIDEONS DICK THE B.F.P
GIGANTIC MACHO POWER MAN MACHINIST NAMES HIS FAVORITE EXPLOSIVE SHELL AFTER HIS FRUITY ASS HUSBAND'S NICKNAME FOR HIS DICK??????? EXCUSE ME???????????????
im not a big soulmates au connoisseur but coalecroux soulmates where part of the reason gideon refuses to take the manacles off is so he doesnt have to see whatevers marked on his forearm bc hes terrified of involuntarily "belonging" to anyone again. mmmmmm. tasty.
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ive been tossing the term around the past month or so anyway but i would like to formally submit the rat bastard x scary dog ship dynamic for your consideration.
it's basically liege x knight except there is no honor and chivalry, they're both pretty much the worst, and yet somehow perfect for each other all the same. they may be unceasingly loyal to each other ONLY and no one else, but there's always the possibility (or reality) that one would sell the other out for any reason or no reason at all. their relationship may be somehow, against all odds, genuinely loving and caring, or it MAY be toxic as fuck, but there's somehow a sense that whatever the case is, it's exactly what they need. maybe they're fated to kill each other. maybe that's somehow peak romance to them.1 maybe they're doomed to die together caught up in one last scheme gone awry.2 maybe one or both of them get redeemed and it's an even bigger problem, or it works too, take your pick.
on the surface, the rat bastard may seem to have a lot more going on. they are often self-made (made into what or how well depends) and carry a lot of baggage, anger, resentment, trauma, or more fueling their plans (which can be anywhere from mild but callously self-serving to absolutely heinous atrocities). the scary dog may be deceptively cheerful and helpful and even blissfully ignorant (but never as much as they seem), or they may be the most barely-restrained seething ball of bloodlust ever seen, but there's always something even more fucked up binding them to their rat bastard of choice. maybe the rat bastard is the only person in the world they have willingly chosen to serve after a life of having choices ripped from them (yum!). maybe the rat bastard trapped them into service and the only thing stopping them from gnawing through their leash is the prospect of even tastier prey (yum!). whatever the case, though, when you sit down to deal with the rat bastard, the glowing red eyes and sickle-sharp grin of the scary dog are right over their shoulder.
Examples below (blanket spoilers!):
1 Enver Gortash x The Dark Urge, Baldur's Gate 3:
This is peak rat bastard with the scariest possible dog. Gortash is a self-made tyrant who freed himself from eternal imprisonment in the Hells as a child when his parents sold him to a devil to pay their debts, clawed his way up the social ladder through street gangs, black market arms deals, slavery, seducing nobles, and Rasputin-level "adviser" roles to become the self-appointed Grand Archduke of Baldur's Gate and now the Chosen of the god of tyranny. He seeks out the Dark Urge, a murder-crazed violent terror who is the living embodiment of the god of murder made flesh carved from Bhaal's side, and said "bet." And it worked. They carried off a series of increasingly audacious heists, culminating in one that leads to the insane elder brain enslavement tadpole chaos that is the main storyline of the game, and, probably, a lot of fucking in between, or whatever the hell it is they did that led to the Dark Urge writing the Prayer of Forgiveness to reassure Daddy Bhaal that despite how much they admire the Gortass, they still plan to slaughter him on Bhaal's altar where they themselves hope to die. Y'know. Kinda like how Bhaalist marriage ceremonies work. Then there's a whole amnesia thing but Gortash literally stops his coronation mid-ceremony to fawn over the Dark Urge in front of everyone and makes them stand next to him while he's crowned King Shit. You can choose to ally with him and never have to kill him (yourself). You should be able to romance him as the Dark Urge but that's what mods are for.
2 Kremy Lecroux x Gideon Coal, Legends of Avantris:
Kremy is a Shadow warlock with a pact with Baron Samedi who has never met a situation that he will not do his utmost to lie, cheat, steal, swindle, gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss his way out of. (He is also a fucking alligator.) Yet somehow he stumbles across this homeless, recently-escaped-from-ten-years-of-captivity hulking bruiser and monster of a fire genasi, and decides to feed him, clean him up, and turn him into his personal bodyguard. They travel together running bad cons and a worse carnival, racking up eye-watering debt, wth Gideon cheerfully disposing of their enemies (and assorted clowns) with fists, fire, and various pig farms, until they finally are on the hook to Kremy's senior mob boss and must head to the Witchlight Carnival to try to (ew) work an honest job. Kremy foists a bunch of fey marriage pacts onto Gideon but can't stop himself from sabotaging even this and ends up married to Gideon as well. People in the feywilds can't stop calling them a couple and making them perform romantic stage productions together. When they think they are dying to the Jabberwock, Kremy does the only intentionally self-defeating act of his life and flings himself over Gideon's body, surrendering to death because "The jig is up, Gid." Then when they survive, he proceeds to continue to cheat and swindle their friends (and Gideon) anyway. A true rat bastard king. (And literal alligator.)
Share your favorites!!! For ex, I am told Silco x Vander from Arcane fits perfectly but haven't seen all of it yet.
Denial & Deception [Fire Emblem: Three Houses; Hubert/Ferdinand] (M, 83K)
Ferdibert fake dating espionage novel-length fic that a couple of you liked ig
the stone and the storm that breaks it [Genshin Impact; Zhongli/Childe] (E, 7K)
Zhongchi bdsm in which Zhongli has just one more errand for Childe he swears.
acts of service [Baldur's Gate 3; Default Durge/Gortash] (E, 6K)
Gortash cares for the Dark Urge after an episode with the Urges.
the b.f.p [Legends of Avantris: Once Upon a Starlight; Gideon/Kremy] (E, 3K)
Drunk Kremy wants his pig. Gideon reflects on their past.
