#bobateabluu

your unspoken agreement is casual, at most, and it doesn’t require much without having feelings involved.

the routine that comes with it is simple — you meet up, get fucked up, and fuck. sometimes it happens at your humble home, and sometimes it’s at her place with a bedroom that could fit your entire apartment. but either way, you love it.

the nights lost in the sheets have done more than enough to help you get by, even if what goes on is nothing close to romantic. there aren’t any soft kisses laced with deeper meaning or needing to tenderly hold one another close once you both collapse from exhaustion. you’re only meant to satisfy each other’s desires, yet there’s a difference in the comfort jennie brings, and it’s not even from how good she makes you feel under her touch.

you enjoy every bit of pleasure just as much, but surprisingly, it’s what happens after your bodies are completely spent that you seem to look forward to more.

it’s the part when you haven’t even fully come down from your high yet, but you’re already lazily clothed, sitting together by the balcony with seoul’s skyline in view. usually sharing a cigarette and a glass of liquor in the other hand, or sometimes even passing a blunt if the moment calls for it, there’s a certain intimacy it holds, as if jennie’s been a long lost friend you’ve crossed paths with again.

the first few encounters end being undeniably awkward, with both of you gauging when the best time to leave is once the deed is done, though it only takes a couple of nights until it gets comfortable. moving past the lewd things said in the bedroom, suddenly you find yourselves confiding in each other, talking as if you’d known each other all your lives.

opening up isn’t natural at all for you, yet it’s surprisingly effortless when it comes to her. she’s earned your trust enough to be told about the rollercoaster that life has been in the past few months, though you’ve made sure to leave out all the details pointing towards the other idol she’s definitely familiar with. jennie doesn’t pry further into who she is, and as always, she’s been content with just sitting with you to quietly listen.

the late night conversations you share are different from the usual ones that grace your day. in some way, they’re special.

even if your situation wasn’t typically ideal, it was reassuring enough to know that you weren’t so alone anymore, and that was exactly what you needed especially when jimin was ever so present again.

if you were to be completely honest, you weren’t quite sure about what to feel from the news of the break up announcement.

at first, you thought you’d be completely happy, and you had to admit that knowing she and your replacement were over did make your heart feel a bit lighter. yet the whole debate between fans if it was all for the sake of publicity surprisingly brought about other feelings.

it’s not as if you ever stopped wondering about her, it’s just that new questions entered your head this time.

was she doing alright? was she in the same state of heartbreak from losing him? or was she actually relieved that the entire alleged fake dating fiasco was over?

though whatever the case, fake or not, you assume it wouldn’t have happened if jimin had never agreed to it in the first place. truthfully, you can’t even blame her. she was all over the headlines, and the publicity that came in exchange was a sweet deal if she was only in it to boost her career.

but then again, maybe that’s just how it is in her world. you sell your soul for whatever keeps you in the spotlight, and apparently jimin was no different. you were just so in love to think that she was too genuine to care.

but despite the endless thoughts and lingering questions, there was no point in seeking answers to them anymore.

as painful as it was to admit again, you and jimin were done.

it really was time to move on.

passing weeks have turned into months since then. life has gone back to a resemblance of how it used to be, sticking to producing for indie artists and small labels, despite the boost in fame within your circle.

still, jennie brings a sense of comfort, whether it’s through pleasure or the late night talks that come with it. there still aren’t feelings involved, but it’s not like you’re complaining anyway.

having no feelings present means having no expectations, and without that, there aren’t any reasons for attachment. you don’t really care, and you’re absolutely fine with whatever allows your heart to stay intact.

are you over jimin? you’re not entirely sure, but you like to think you are.

you’ve been doing a lot better at keeping your feelings at bay, though it’s not as if they aren’t there. they’ve just become easier to keep repressed, somehow like a deep cut in your heart that’s ever present, yet you’ve picked up the pieces enough for the pain to get ignored, for the most part. that wound hasn’t completely healed, but it’s well in the process of getting there, and you’re just begging it doesn’t get reopened again.

life has become seemingly quiet compared to what it used to be. your days have been predictable in a sense, and you like the familiarity if it keeps your well-being in check.

but life does have its ways, wanting to test how long that wound can stay patched up when your phone rings with a name you thought you’d forgotten flashing right on its screen.

you remain frozen as it continues buzzing, contemplating if you should even pick up at all. it goes on for about a minute, then it stops. but after a quick sigh of relief, it only takes a few seconds until the device in your hands is ringing again, making it clear that whatever needs to be talked about is definitely important.

it’s been months. what could she possibly want? or rather, what could they want? it might be a mistake to answer, but the building curiosity makes you unable to stop yourself.

“hi y/n.” it’s actually a cheerful greeting, yet you know there’s an underlying purpose to this sudden conversation, and you can’t help but respond with indifference.

“sooyoung.”

“it’s been awhile. i’m glad you picked up.”

“what’s this about?” another greeting gets blatantly ignored. you’re in no mood for fake introductions, clearly not mirroring her smile on the other end. your heart’s racing, just wanting her to get to the point as soon as possible.

you already assume the worst, figuring you’re about to lose all credit for supernova or that this could be the dreaded phone call to inform you of a lawsuit waiting with your name on it.

before reaching out, sooyoung meant to casually ease into the rest of the conversation, though all plans of that happening have gone down the drain by the way she can already tell you’re on edge.

she clears her throat before she continues.

“we want you to produce another song for aespa.”

“why me?” you’re thankful none of your initial thoughts are what they need you for, yet what she says isn’t relieving to hear at all.

“well, all the demos presented so far keep getting rejected. i had to take a chance and see if you’d be up for it.”

“so i’m your last resort?” you ask instantly, evident tone of annoyance present.

“no, y/n. it’s not that,” she responds, pausing for a moment to let out a sigh. but when she speaks again, her voice suddenly softens. “there’s something special about you.”

“and if i’m being honest, it’s still your sound that captures aespa the most.”

it doesn’t matter if she wasn’t lying, you’re left unimpressed by her compliments. you’re not asking for flattery. you don’t even want to consider it, replying immediately once more before you allow yourself to think. “i already have a lot going on right now. sorry.”

“wait. listen, i know a lot has happened in the past few months. this whole industry can be crazy sometimes.”

you scoff in your thoughts.

you don’t know the half of it.

“and if you’re expecting some sort of apology from sm, i’ll be the one to tell you that sadly, this is the best they can do.”

it’s funny she even mentions that, as if she just wants you to decline.

you want to admire sooyoung’s persistence, but you’re not asking for sympathy either, especially not from them. though there’s guilt laced in her words, so you say nothing to let her continue.

“but do it for jimin, at least.”

yet that’s what breaks through the hard facade. you’re left stunned for a moment, and you honestly don’t know what to respond to that.

once the name slips out, only deafening silence is heard in the seconds that pass.

“look, if you change your mind, you know where to reach me.”

“bye sooyoung.”

yup, life was testing you alright. it’s oddly timely, right when you’ve regained a sense of control over things.

though ultimately, the decision is still yours to make. there shouldn’t be any factor to stop you from saying no, not even the considerable paycheck or another track for a top company added to your résumé.

it’s simple. all you need to do is ignore the offer, and you’ll be happily on your way back to days free from any reminders of heartbreak.

yet you just can’t. since that call was dropped, it’s all you’ve been thinking about.

were you ready to let jimin back into your life again?

the decision hanging above your head has you battling with your own conscience. it’s been eating at your brain, right to the point where your mind hasn’t been clear enough to interact with anyone, including jennie and her attempts of hooking up that could surely make you forget about it.

the first few times you decline don’t bother her at all. she’s busy, you’re busy. she gets it. but it’s been weeks since the sudden change in pattern, and jennie just needs to find out why you keep saying no.

you’d think it’s just her being needy, wanting to get her fix whether you’re truly up for it or not, but it surprisingly isn’t the case.

in the months you and her have been in this arrangement, you’re certain it hasn’t been purely about satisfaction, though it’s unknown to you that she’s had the same thoughts as well. the term of friends with benefits does carry the word ‘friend’ in it after all, and that’s exactly what she views you as. a rather close friend, if she were to say so herself, and she just feels the need to check up on you.

to be honest, she looks forward to your late night talks as much as you do. you’ve told her more than enough times that her presence does a lot to help you get by, and with your sudden disappearance lately, she can definitely tell something’s up.

it’s past 10 pm once your quiet evening is interrupted from the doorbell ringing. you’re not in any way expecting guests tonight, leaving you quite startled to find jennie waiting on the other side of your apartment door.

“hi?”

you expect to receive some explanation for why she decided to show up, but instead, it’s like she’s the one who’s surprised once your eyes meet.

“my god, you look horrible,” she says, eyebrows furrowing while she scans your face. noticing the messy hair and dark circles, it’s obvious you haven’t slept in days.

most of the time you appreciate jennie’s bluntness, yet you’re not amused by her comment and the sudden company. but before you can even retort, she’s already pushing past you to make herself at home. with her shoes instantly flung off by the doorway and her purse lazily falling onto the couch, she goes back to observing you.

“so, what’s been up with you lately?”

“work. that’s all,” you answer with a shrug, but you avoid her gaze, which tells her otherwise. in a second, her jaw drops along with her eyes nervously growing wide, looking like she’s been hit by a truck.

“y/n, don’t tell me you actually have feelings for me or anything. believe me, i’m the last person you’d want to fall in love with—”

part of you wants to let her continue the cute stammering until she embarrasses herself enough, though you’re not really in the mood for any games. you decide not to, frantic waving hands causing her to stop. “oh my god, jen. that’s not it.”

“oh okay, cause you scared me for a second.” a sigh of relief escapes before her signature smirk returns, yet she still hasn’t earned a smile from you.

“but really, what’s going on with you?” she asks again, already by the kitchen bringing out two glasses for whiskey to be poured, like she knows tonight’s conversation is about to be a serious one.

“sm wants me to produce for aespa again.”

you don’t sound the least bit excited when you say it, especially because of the audible huff you let out once you heavily sink into the couch, making jennie’s eyebrow raise in confusion.

“and why isn’t that great news?” she comes closer to place a glass in your hands, taking a seat to settle beside you while she waits for an answer.

after taking a gulp, you figure it’s about time she knew. jennie’s proven that you could trust her anyway.

“so the girl i’ve been telling you about…” you begin, voice trailing off for a second as she leans in anticipation. there’s never actually been a name or face tied to whoever’s been on your mind for so long.

“it’s jimin.”

“that’s who you’ve been moping about all this time?!” her voice shoots straight into your ears from the sudden confession, eyes growing wide and jaw dropping again, but you only reply with a deep sigh.

“damn, i’m actually impressed,” she jokes in an attempt to lighten the mood. your sunken expression hasn’t changed though, blankly staring into the liquor swirling in your glass. “so, are you taking it? doesn’t that mean you get to see her again?”

“i don’t know if that’s a good idea. i’m sure you saw the news about her dating.”

“you know that was obviously fake, right?” her reply comes out instantly, staring at you in disbelief.

“what?”

“y/n, it was a publicity stunt. companies do it all the time.” the way she says it is like it’s supposed to be common knowledge, but she’s still met with your clear confusion as the words leave her lips. “i didn’t know what to believe.”

“wait, why did she break up with you again?”

“we were good, jen. then she suddenly said sm wouldn’t allow it anymore.”

“let me guess, threatening to put the group on hiatus? god, it’s always the same bullshit,” she exclaims, eyes rolling at her own statement.

“i don’t know. she never mentioned anything else.”

“see, they probably forced her to end things so you wouldn’t be a problem once the dating news came out.”

there’s conviction in the way she speaks, making you remind yourself that you could trust jennie. she’s only been so straight forward with things, and she’s definitely been in the industry long enough to have seen it all. there was no way she could be lying.

“i’m so confused,” is all you say though, responding with a whisper as your face gets buried into your hands. “why didn’t she tell me?”

“you’ll have to ask her that yourself. but y/n, that’s the way this fucking industry works. if you want what’s best for you, you’re supposed to blindly follow whatever management says.”

it becomes silent as she observes you, watching your brain work in overdrive to connect the dots. she wishes you had told her about jimin sooner, though she completely understands why you chose to leave her name out it.

she isn’t sure of what she feels for you at the moment, if it’s pity or if she’s glad that she’s managed to shed some light on your thoughts. yet seeing you in this situation seems all too familiar for jennie. now, more of your pain makes sense.

“i’ve been there, you know.” as she speaks again, her voice comes out a bit differently this time. there’s a sadness to it, somewhat like an underlying hint of longing, and it causes you to look up to finally meet her gaze. “what do you mean?”

“the whole falling in love when you’re not supposed to, career being put on the line type of thing. i just stopped caring a long time ago.”

throughout the nights of her company, jennie’s made you feel safe enough to slowly open up to her. she’s only ever shared details of crazy escapades with one night stands and past flings that didn’t quite work out. it’s never really gotten much deeper when she speaks about love, and judging from your current situation, you figure she’s just not the type of girl who’s in it for the long run.

there’s a part of her past that’s remained unknown to you. it doesn’t just get told to anyone, yet in that moment, without a doubt, jennie knew she could trust you with her story too.

regardless of her reputation, you’ve admired her entire take it or leave it personality. but as another glass of liquor gets poured, a new side of her shows itself. it seems to be even more genuine, walls completely down and quite a contrast from the careless persona you’ve gotten used to. her voice suddenly softens and her gaze strays away from yours, and you can’t help but notice the faint glint in her eye from a tear forming right at the edge.

it’s been years since she lost the only person she’s ever loved, but the memories seem just like yesterday.

she remembers everything about the day she met jisoo. she could never forget how bright the sun was, how she stumbled into the nearest cafe for an iced latte to escape the heat, but most of all, the beautiful barista handing over the drink from the other side of the counter. she could never forget her smile either, and jennie just knew she had to see her again.

taking only a few seemingly unplanned visits and a couple of lattes later, it became the summer love everyone dreams about, filled with exciting dates and late nights of shared kisses without the world to see.

in the midst of jennie’s rising fame, it seemed like she really had it all, yet it was what went on behind closed doors that truly made her feel complete.

ideally, love wasn’t even something she was looking for. when she thought about it, having someone would only slow her down, possibly just get in the way of her road to stardom. jisoo was never supposed to be part of the picture, but somehow, she felt exactly like the missing piece.

she became jennie’s little secret, her much needed escape from the pressure of idol life. quiet, simple yet standing out effortlessly in the field of fans, bringing her happiness like no other. jisoo was her very own flower to tend to and admire, even if she was the one placed on a pedestal to be adored by the world.

but as the public’s love for her grew, so did the company’s need for control. her reputation had to remain spotless if it meant more opportunities falling into her lap, and jennie was eventually forced to make that difficult decision of choosing whose love to keep.

she couldn’t lose jisoo, but she couldn’t let go of the dream she had worked so hard for as well. she tried to convince herself that they could still hide it, despite the risks. but at that point, it was inevitable, and jennie painfully decided to let the love of her life go.

jennie promised that she would find her again someday, when she was free, far from a life consumed by keeping up with the perfect image. she had no idea when that would be or if the time would ever come at all, yet she held onto that promise as a means to get by.

the months turned into years, and once she received that unexpected invitation, it marked that the chance to relive that great summer love would never come again.

jisoo just couldn’t wait forever.

the last time they had locked eyes was the day of jisoo’s wedding. it was an intimate gathering by the countryside, away from the busy city and flashing lights jennie’s life revolved around. standing at the altar, jisoo still looked as beautiful as she did on that very first day, but her smile was different. it was brighter, happier than jennie had ever seen.

that’s when it made sense. it was true — a flower can never bloom if it doesn’t get to see the sun.

she finally wasn’t just someone’s mere little secret. in her own world, jisoo was finally able to bloom with a love that was free for everyone to witness.

on that day, jennie made a new promise, realizing that she too could bloom if she allowed every part of who she was to bask in the sunlight. she wouldn’t allow any more room for regrets, despite everything that was expected of her.

if it led her to finally choosing herself and putting her own happiness first, then giving up the love of her was a fair price to pay for the years of heartbreak.

as her story finishes, you’re standing side by side on the balcony with smoke over your heads getting lost in the breeze. somehow, you can tell it’s probably the last cigarette you’ll ever share together, and it’s funny how even that final moment is identical to how you met. 

you never questioned if there was a deeper meaning for jennie to come into your life, other than she kept you distracted as you picked up the pieces to feel whole again. though from the night’s entire conversation, that’s when it dawned upon you. in that moment, you fully understood why fate led you and jennie to that unexpected interaction outside of the party’s chilly balcony.

“you still love her, don’t you?”

the question hangs in the air for a moment, clearly catching you off guard. you can’t even remember the last time you asked it to yourself. a million thoughts seem to fill your mind, and honestly, you don’t even know what to say.

silence is your only response, but from that, it’s obvious what the answer is.

“you should do it.” it’s encouraging when she says it, voice carrying a sense of determination, like she just knows it’s what’s meant for you. but as if she hasn’t convinced you enough throughout the night, you still reply with a light shake of your head. “i don’t know, jen.”

“y/n, life’s too fucking short for passing on second chances.”

the last stick gets flicked into the ashtray as the words eacape. before you can even respond, she’s already halfway inside, gathering her things on her way towards the door.

“leaving so soon?”

“it’s late. i gotta get going.” you catch her right by the entrance, taking some time to slip on her shoes and adjust herself in the mirror.

in the seconds that pass, you can’t help but observe her, gaze trailing to take in each of her features that have become so familiar. it could possibly be the last time you’ll ever see jennie, so you might as well remember the image of the person who brought you comfort for so long, especially the pretty cat eyes you bared your soul to throughout the months.

once her hands sits on the doorknob to signal that she’s ready to go, she pauses, wanting to tell you something before the night ends.

“you know, one day, jimin will stop caring too.” a soft smile graces her lips when she says it, making you nod in response. “thanks, jen.”

“for what?”

“you already know.”

she chuckles to herself. she knows exactly why.

“call me if it doesn’t work out.”

the signature smirk paired with a playful wink are the last things you receive from jennie, yet you’re certain it’s the perfect way to say goodbye.

the second she leaves turns into a couple more hours of being alone with your thoughts. if you stayed like this a little longer, the sun is bound to come up soon, though the need for sleep hasn’t settled in at all. jennie’s words have been set on an endless loop, bouncing off the walls in your head like a little voice whispering to fully trust it.

your heart is bursting with emotions. you can’t even pinpoint what it is you’re feeling. if it’s excitement, nervousness, sheer anxiety, or just everything all at once.

but whatever it is, somehow, it feels right.

taking in a deep breath, the call button finally gets pressed.

“jesus, what time is it?” the voice on the other end answers, groggy and clearly disoriented from being suddenly woken up.

“sooyoung, i’ll do it.”

“oh.” it occurs to her who she’s speaking to, and it’s almost as if you can sense her lips curl into a smile right through the phone. “i’m glad you called then.”

“tell me the details.”

“i’ll fill you in on everything in the morning. but just so you know, it’s going to be called whiplash.”

a/n - jensoo nation scream 😔😭

the version of her that came to your apartment was the same one that returned to the dorm later that evening. a nearly unrecognizable jimin, drowning in emotions — sadness, guilt, regret — evident in the way she crashed into the comfort of her members’ arms the second she arrived.

she’s always been known as the strong one, remaining unfazed by whatever’s been thrown their way, somehow like the glue they rely on to hold them all together. it’s really just part of her confident nature. yet it was the first time they had seen her like this, so vulnerable and so broken right in front of their eyes.

witnessing it hurt them just as much. they’ve become like family, treating her like the unnie they’ve never had, but she’s more than that.

throughout the years, jimin has been aespa’s leader in every sense of the word, from their trainee days up until their names needed no introduction. she’s spoken for the group at award shows, represented them on the biggest stages, and made the toughest choices to benefit each of her girls. most of all, she’s been who they constantly turn to when the world becomes overwhelming and life becomes too much.

jimin’s always put them first, setting aside her own feelings and needs whenever it’s asked of her. and even on that night, she made the decision to keep the company’s threats to herself, willing to bear the pain on her own if it could save them from worrying.

being strong for them isn’t even a question. it’s just part of the job, like it’s her duty as their leader to protect them, even at the cost of her own happiness.

though nothing about losing you was easy for jimin. and just like you, a lot had changed for her since then.

it’s funny how the universe works, like it hasn’t done enough to prove that you were connected in more ways than one.

without any of you knowing, it was as if you were living parallel lives, going through the same phases of pain even when you were apart. the shared weight of reality made getting up in the morning just as heavy, and with every day you ended in bed restlessly wondering about her, jimin was actually doing the same.

nights were always the worst. the time of the day when the world was quiet, yet her mind was filled with noise. the same questions came every time, along with the same thoughts of what could’ve been and what she should’ve done differently.

the late hours of pondering felt like an endless cycle, repeatedly leading to her staring at your name displayed on her phone, fingers ghosting over the call button. in those moments, jimin just desperately wanted to know that you were still there, like all it would take was the sound of your voice to completely stop her world from crumbling. but honestly, it sounded ridiculous to even think about.

first of all, would you even pick up? from the way she had never heard from you since then, jimin figured you wanted nothing to do with her anymore, though she knew she couldn’t blame you.

but if you did answer, what difference would it make? there weren’t enough words to tell you how sorry she was or how much she missed you, but if she had poured her heart out begging for forgiveness it would only be meaningless. still, nothing would have changed. she wouldn’t be able to fight for you, and the possibility of getting you involved again just wasn’t a risk jimin was willing to take.

maybe that’s all those words were, merely things that were to echo in her thoughts, but never meant to be said out loud. yet all that was left unspoken was always what brought her back to the final moments of that night’s painful conversation, when you whispered the three words that ended up stinging her heart the most.

part of her wished you had never said them at all, since now she could never tell you that she felt exactly the same.

jimin fell in love with you on that beautiful night by the beach in gangneung, when it became even clearer that there was more to you than simply someone who made her heart flutter. in the midst of everything, it wasn’t the calmness of the surrounding scene that brought solace. not the stillness of the moon, not even the peaceful movement of the waves across the shore.

that’s when it all clicked.

it was you. it was you that drowned out every bit of noise in her life.

it didn’t matter if you were barely alike, status and lives nowhere near each other, belonging to different worlds, as they say. it didn’t need to be perfect or come anywhere close to a match made in heaven.

in your own way, you were the missing piece she was never even looking for, and with you, her world felt complete.

she wished she was as brave as you were that night, yet she allowed fear to stop every fiber of her being that wanted to say it back. in that moment, what scared her the most was that if she had said what her heart truly felt, it would make things real — that the two of you were in love. and if it was real, jimin just knew she could never let you go.

again, maybe that was it. simply feelings that were to be kept to herself, along with more words left to be unsaid.

a love story that wasn’t meant to continue, only to be painfully buried over time.

the weight of heavy memories settled even deeper throughout the days. jimin couldn’t escape like you did. despite how much she resented the company, life just had to go on, continuing with her idol duties of making good impressions and forcing bright smiles for the crowds and cameras.

jimin thought she had gotten good at hiding things. part of her job was having to present herself as perfect after all, no matter what she was going through. but regardless of how hard she tried, she couldn’t fake it behind closed doors, especially not for the people who knew her as much as she knew herself.

the dorm has been awfully quiet without her playful presence since then. most of the time she swears she’s fine, but the girls can’t help but worry when it’s quite obvious that their leader hasn’t been herself lately.

suddenly, the silly jokes are nonexistent, and her usual teasing grin has been reduced to a few weak smiles here and there. even at practice, it’s like she’s barely present, hardly interacting with the staff and making a couple mistakes on choreography they’ve supposedly perfected by now.

though the girls understand her completely, and jimin appreciates their little gestures that still manage to bring comfort even when she’s far from fine.

minjeong comes to her room with food to make sure she’s eaten for the day, ning blows up her phone with the latest memes that still seem to earn a giggle, and aeri doesn’t even mind when she comes knocking on her door in the middle of the night just to feel someone’s presence to ease her mind. but most of all, they’re always more than happy to listen in the rare moments she opens up about missing you.

truthfully, she just doesn’t want to burden them with any more of her problems, but it’s the least they could do for how she’s constantly been there for them all this time.

her members and their mys seemed to be the only source of motivation she had left, so she figured that burying herself in work was the only form of escape within reach. though naturally, having to keep up through the struggle of bottling up feelings didn’t make things any easier.

if you were going out of your way to avoid any possible reminder of her, jimin couldn’t even if she tried.

it surely didn’t help that your name usually gets mentioned with the song that was still winning the group award after award. to everyone else, aespa were seen as the stars, yet she always believed that you deserved every bit of recognition they did. ironically, each trophy jimin held in her hands didn’t feel as gratifying as it used to be, now only a blaring reminder of how you’d humbly deflect her compliments to say you’re just happy she gets to shine.

standing in the spotlight just wasn’t complete knowing you weren’t there, leaving her reminiscing on stolen glances, part of her still hoping that she’d find your proud smile in the crowd again someday.

i miss you.

besides her members, it was the fans who were somehow keeping her together, but to her surprise, even they hadn’t forgotten about you too.

it’s another day of having to force herself to be completely fine. she honestly isn’t proud to face them when she isn’t entirely back to her usual self yet, though getting to meet mys at a fansign event is a lot better than being locked up to sit with all the emotions on her own.

jimin’s used to how the interactions go by now. the fans do a lot in keeping her spirits up, usually coming with praises to let her know how much they adore her and about how well she’s done in the recent performances. sometimes they even ask her to be their wife, which she always finds so adorable.

but today, she’s met with a fan who clearly stands out from all the other mys she’s come across before.

she’s obviously a new face, and for some reason, jimin can’t help but be reminded of you by the woman standing in front of her. it could be the shy demeanor, the soft-spoken voice, or possibly the similar tattoo lined arms that slide the album from across the table, though she can’t quite tell what it is exactly.

but the interaction starts off how it typically goes. she says she absolutely loved their latest comeback and lists which songs of theirs have been her favorite so far. the fan’s words come off a bit shaky, but it’s cute, and jimin just has to tease her for being so nervous to speak to her favorite idol.

they share a laugh and the tension finally eases. a few more compliments are thrown jimin’s way, right before she shares that she’s never actually been a fan of any group until she listened to aespa, and the conversation unexpectedly goes a little deeper after that.

“what made you decide to become a my then?” jimin asks, bright smile flashing as her eyes flicker between meeting the woman’s gaze and focusing on the album being signed in her hands.

she assumes the usual answers, something along the lines that they’re pretty and talented, which are still heartwarming even after being said so many times.

“it was actually thanks to y/n.”

oh.

her breath hitches.

that’s a new one.

in an instant, the room’s buzzing chatter disappears. it’s been awhile since she heard someone speak your name, and as the words fully register in her head, her heart can’t help but soften.

“really?” she tries to stay nonchalant, like it’s an answer she’s received before. though it clearly has her caught off guard by how she stops writing mid-sentence, marker completely leaving her hand to be set on the table.

the woman nods as she looks into jimin’s suddenly gleaming eyes. “i’ve been a big fan of hers, and when i found out she was producing for aespa, i just had to become a my. i even watched your interview together.” 

“what did you think?” she still pretends to play it cool, but the way her question quickly slips out makes her sound a little too eager. thankfully, none of the staff standing close by are paying much attention to the ongoing conversation.

the my’s soft-spokenness leaves as she begins excitedly rambling about her thoughts on the episode, saying things about jimin immediately becoming her bias just because she’s your favorite too. she’s obviously more of your fan, but jimin doesn’t even mind.

it’s honestly a weird feeling, somewhere caught in between looking back on a painful memory and at the same time, warmth washing over from hearing someone speak so fondly of the two of you again. though surprisingly, the latter manages to hit harder this time.

it’s actually adorable, somewhat refreshing, even comforting.

but before the fan can even finish, the staff signal that her time with the idol is up and she gets ushered to move on to the next member.

“i hope to see more of you and y/n again soon. fighting!” receiving her last encouraging words, jimin quickly scribbles a final dedication onto the page.

“i hope so too.”

she can’t help but smile to herself. today’s definitely a good day compared to the others.

even when you aren’t around anymore, you still seem to be so perfect together through someone else’s eyes.

p.s. thank you for loving me and y/n.

the interaction really wasn’t supposed to mean much, simply adding more lines to the list of praises she’s heard so far, yet the unexpected words continued to resonate in jimin’s head as the days passed. for the first time in a long time, being reminded of happier times with you didn’t hurt. but rather, there was a sense of comfort brought from that conversation that seemed to linger on.

days seemed a bit brighter, nights weren’t as heavy as they usually were. jimin was far from forgetting you, but just a little closer to getting her spirits up.

however, that comfort didn’t last long, completely disappearing as she spotted jaewook on the day she was set to be welcomed as prada’s muse.

she decided to brush it off. the occasion was meant to honor her after all. nothing was going to ruin it, not even him always being positioned a little too close to her throughout the event.

for the most part, the night had gone smoothly. it was as if the usual karina was present, giving genuine smiles for the cameras, back with being full of confidence in facing the press and interviews. the moment she was called on stage felt surreal, almost having to pinch herself from sheer disbelief that out of every possible celebrity, it was her who was chosen to represent such a brand.

this was it — a dream of hers finally materializing right in front of her. a new reason to make her members and their mys proud, maybe even make you proud. but most importantly, another reason for jimin to be proud again of herself.

but as predictable as it was, the day after was when sm released the dating statements without jimin’s consent. her world came crashing down in an instant, sick to her stomach with every headline welcoming the newest so-called royal couple flashing before her eyes.

none of this was what she ever wanted when she dreamt of becoming an idol. as cliche as it sounds, it was supposed to be for the love of music, the fans, to possibly even leave her own mark in the industry in some way.

that’s when another moment of the sad reality hit her, making it clear that the things she had tried to stay oblivious to were true all along. there was much more lying beneath the contract she had signed, the years of hard work, and everything she had built herself up on. being an idol simply meant allowing yourself to become a product of the industry. now jimin was merely a pawn in a media play game, gaining attention for all the wrong reasons.

as both agencies quickly confirmed the news, it was as if the whole world was tuned in. the feedback from the public was immense, attracting investors and media coverage all over the country. even the mys were supportive, wanting nothing more than their karina’s happiness.

sm entertainment had finally gotten what they wanted.

every article, every tabloid, every news source all beared the same headline. jaewook and karina, the names on everyone’s lips.

but jimin surprisingly didn’t care at all.

in the midst of the chaos, only a single thought filled her mind — you.

no matter how hard she prayed the news would never reach you, she practically knew that was impossible. being certain of that couldn’t stop the guilt from eating her up again, and the painful image of you being gone forever just became clearer and clearer.

in those moments, it was still as if the only the thing that could bring her comfort was to feel your presence. she contemplated on reaching out, desperately wanting to show up at your apartment to explain. jimin just needed to convince you that none of it was real, that she would never purposely hurt you like this. and maybe, just maybe, you’d allow her to sink into the safety of your arms again.

instead, she didn’t. more like she couldn’t, knowing it would be completely pointless to drag you further into this mess.

do you hate me now?

it was the hardest to fake smiles then. jimin was fighting to keep it together, though ultimately, she knew she couldn’t pretend anymore, not even for her members and the fans. but somehow, it didn’t take long before the public eventually caught on, and that’s when the situation finally took a turn for the better.

despite what seemed like overwhelming support, the hate was inevitable too. while jaewook was being praised and called the luckiest man alive for bagging a top idol, jimin was left on the receiving end of the public’s opinions. giving into the toxicity, people began questioning her leadership and loyalty to the fans, leaving them divided between supporting her and feeling betrayed by her.

some had even wanted her to leave the group entirely, and even if hate wasn’t anything new with being in the spotlight, the weight of things were too heavy for her to resist letting it get to her head.

jimin couldn’t find it in herself to interact with fans then, closing herself off from the world, even online. she’s always been so open with them, sharing little bits and pieces of her life, even subtly mentioning you a couple of times. but suddenly, the updates had stopped. the mys’ sweet jiminie and monday fairy was gone, leaving them only with complete radio silence. jimin obviously wasn’t happy, and from there fans began doubting if the relationship was even real at all.

meanwhile, both companies were riding off the sudden publicity. sm was hungry as ever in securing investors, while jaewook and his agency used jimin’s status and mentioned her name in every situation they could. though as she stayed silent and speculations grew, sources timely began leaking that it was just a huge publicity stunt to begin with.

it confirmed what was on everyone’s minds, and that’s when the headlines had shifted.

things quickly started to backfire. with credibility being questioned, the hate became directed towards the companies. protest trucks sent by furious fans began swarming the sm building, demanding for better treatment and protection for jimin and aespa. sales were boycotted and stocks quickly plummeted, and as predictable as it was again, both agencies took the easy way out to save face.

with the excuse of the individuals involved wanting to focus on their careers, the split was announced just weeks later, to jimin’s relief and the mys’ relief.

the news seemed to haunt you since the day you found out. jimin became unavoidable again, leaving you without a choice but to face every update, each happy picture, and all the little details about her and the new person in her life.

you still didn’t hate her though.

despite how hard you’d been trying to distance yourself from her, the urge to finally get in touch couldn’t help but float around in your head in those times. perhaps as a simple sign that you were still alive, or maybe just a subtle reminder that even after everything, she was still on your mind.

honestly, you just wanted her to know that you still cared, that you were the same y/n who would stay true to your promise of supporting her, even if it was just as a friend.

but then again, you figured it was for the best to just let her be. it would’ve been stupid anyway. she did seem happy, and you weren’t the reason behind her smile anymore. jimin had clearly moved on, that’s really all there was to it.

it was just another point of acceptance, though a more painful one, causing you to fall back into the same routine of searching for escape in blurry nights. as long as you kept yourself numb, it was enough to get by.

you’d be fine again eventually, right?

over time, ryujin had finally succeeded in getting that one crush she told you about to become her girlfriend. you’ve hung out with yeji a couple of times, even third wheeling on some nights when they felt obliged to keep you company. she was cool, considering you practically belonged in the same circle. on top of that, she seemed to tame some of your best friend’s recklessness, so there really wasn’t anything about her you didn’t approve of. and between you and ryujin, you were just thankful that at least one of you was happy.

however, the night of yeji’s birthday was when things took an unexpected turn.

you’d be lying if you said you wholeheartedly wanted to come. even though your career basically revolved around parties with crowds looking to have a good time, mingling and forcing small talk with people you would forget by the end of the evening was never your thing. but with new heavy thoughts freshly flooding your mind, all it took was the promise of free flowing drinks to get you to show up. it was just another momentary chance to forget, and it was the least you could do for the many nights she and ryujin kept you sane.

the apartment was packed by the time you arrived. you did what you had to do to endure the night — enjoyed the music, downed one too many shots until you were happily lightheaded, tagged along with ryujin as you caught up with some familiar faces. though at some point she had gotten lost in the crowd to check up on her birthday girl, leaving you alone on the couch to fend for yourself in the ongoing circle of small talk happening around you.

with your mind clouded by the liquor in your system, it would’ve been bearable. it could possibly be even the chance to flirt with someone new for the night. but it particularly wasn’t amusing that most of the introductions started with “aren’t you the producer of supernova?” which led to faking a call just to excuse yourself for a much needed smoke on the empty balcony.

even in this circle, all you’re reminded of is jimin.

jesus christ.

the outside air blows a bit too chilly once it grazes your skin, but you don’t mind at all. with a cigarette lit in your mouth, you’re already comfortably leaning against the farthest corner with the best view of the city lights in the distance.

it’s quiet and peaceful for a while, puffing away right before the sliding door opening with someone’s presence interrupts the silence.

you don’t bother to give a polite smile or even dare to make eye contact, wanting to savor just a few more minutes of alone time before heading back inside, but whoever you’re now sharing the space with doesn’t quite pick up on that.

“needed to clear your head?” a voice from behind you says.

as you turn to its owner, you’re met by a new pair of cat-like eyes that need no introduction, yet there’s an evident flinch in the second your brain makes sense of who they belong to.

a timid hum is all you manage to respond with, taking in a long drag as you attempt to keep calm.

the woman’s gaze surprisingly hasn’t shifted, trailing across your frame like she’s sizing you up if you’re actually worthy to speak to her. but she did approach you first, which says a lot.

“mind if i join you?”

“not at all.”

receiving a light shake of your head, she takes a few steps forward, stopping close enough that you catch a scent of her perfume through the smoke in the air. it registers as somewhat sultry, like fresh flowers mixed with a hint of brand new leather. it suits her, you tell yourself.

as she leans on the railing next to you, her fingers begin fishing through the handbag on her shoulder. she pulls out a pack of menthols, and with a cigarette dangling on the edge of her mouth, she does a bit more fumbling. it takes a few seconds of palming and light pats on her pockets, until a groan of annoyance escapes once she realizes she’s forgotten a lighter. it’s actually an adorable expression to hear, considering it’s coming from someone as famous as she is.

“let me.” the lightheadedness brings an added boost of confidence, causing your hand to raise and flick a flame onto the stick resting on her lips, earning a cute wink as a thank you.

“i don’t think we’ve met,” she states, exhaling the first puff that gets lost in the wind.

“i’m—”

“y/n.”

she doesn’t even hesitate. the way she speaks is smooth, velvety, undeniably sexy, and you like hearing how effortlessly your name rolls off her tongue.

“you know who i am?” you can’t fake the surprise in your voice, but she replies with a simple shrug, as if she’s not a household name by now.

“i wouldn’t be talking to you if i didn’t.”

there was always something about yeji that struck you as well-connected, to say the least, like that one friend who always knows somebody who knows somebody. it was clear in the way she would casually mention celebrities in conversations, and even clearer in the way tonight’s apparently simple gathering was packed.

you’re not even supposed to be surprised that there were all kinds of famous stars present, but what you never expected was the biggest star in the room deciding to speak to you of all people.

“i’m jennie.”

“i know.”

her lips curl into a smirk. of course you do.

who doesn’t know the jennie kim?

like jimin, she was another one of the nation’s beloved idols, though for a number of different reasons. having to keep up with the public’s standards meant nothing to her, and she certainly wasn’t fazed by anything anyone had to say about her, really. to put things bluntly, jennie kim didn’t give a fuck.

her notorious image obviously brought on the haters, but to you and most of the others, there was a certain charm in her bad girl image. she felt relatable in a way, almost even refreshing to see an idol who wasn’t weighed down by their status.

the ongoing conversation lasts a little longer than you expect it to. suddenly, both of you are going back and forth on introductions, sharing how the two of you ended up at tonight’s party.

you assume for your chat with the idol to end once another cigarette gets stubbed out in the ashtray. yet it doesn’t. it continues, just in other ways.

“you wanna get out of here?” it’s a rhetorical question. she doesn’t even bother to wait for your answer as she already begins walking away, like she knows you’re about to follow her like a puppy dog simply obeying its master.

you can’t quite tell what she means by that, but you do anyway. frankly, you don’t even care.

it’s another form of escape being offered. you just can’t resist, and the night gets even hazier after that.

a series of events follow. 

first, you’re hotboxing in the back seat of the most expensive car you’ve ever been in. a custom jet black porsche, to be exact, puffing and passing with jennie until your brains turn to absolute mush.

moments later, your back’s being shoved against the door, with hot lips pressing lipstick stained wet kisses along your neck.

and lastly, the new cat eyes are paired with a devilish smirk, meeting your gaze from right between your bare thighs, and you remember thinking to yourself that being numb never felt so fucking good.

it started when you were in a dark time in your life, having just gone through a break up with the person who you thought was the girl of your dreams. you were certain she was the one, but finding out she was sleeping around with a number of people behind your back left you with barely any will to live. you were shattered, and that’s when you vowed you were never going to fall in love again.

on the way home from work one evening, you discovered aespa as their voices blasted through the radio of the cab you were in. you eventually liked their music and you couldn’t deny that they were so damn beautiful, so you added each song to your playlist and kept up with the latest comebacks. they soon became your escape from reality, using their upbeat melodies to clear your mind of every emotion you felt. but from the four members, there was one who you gravitated towards the most. you found yourself smiling like an idiot whenever you’d see aeri’s round eyes and bright bunny-toothed smile, making each of your days slowly become brighter as well.

after a few months of becoming a dedicated my, you were lucky enough to win a fansign event with aespa. being aeri’s self-proclaimed biggest fan, you were ecstatic for weeks. you made sure to go shopping for a new outfit and even got a tattoo of her moon emblem. it was a symbol of how she saved you from one of the lowest points in your life.

she traced her fingers over your arm as you showed it to her, eyes gleaming with appreciation. she loved it. her mark on you showed dedication. though it wasn’t the first time someone had presented her with a tattoo they had gotten for her, but the difference this time was that you were actually really cute. you were exactly her type.

so as you stared deep into her round eyes babbling on about how much you adored her, you failed to notice the digits she had written down in your album. your eyes grew wide once you flipped through the page that night, realizing what that wink she said goodbye to you with really meant.

the first time aeri came by your place was casual. you made the effort to cook her your signature dish and spent the night getting to know each other. but the second time was when things took an interesting turn. the night started with a kiss and things eventually led to something else, making you realize there were more ways to scream her name aside from just fangirling at concerts. from there, the rest is history.

it had been about 3 months of aeri coming by your place a couple times a week. it didn’t matter if her schedule was packed, she always made time to stop by. you became what every fan wanted to be. you were the one aeri chose to spend her late nights with, even if it meant nothing more than being tangled with her in the sheets. she was needy, while you were always more than willing to give, leading you to become accustomed to the toxic cycle. but it didn’t matter to you, it was thrilling. you were her little secret. and from the day you showed her the moon on your arm at the fansign event, she knew she had you wrapped around her finger.

from the many nights you two spent together, you remembered the first time you refused her vividly.

it was the day your boss had given you an especially rough time at work, making you contemplate if you should resign right there and then. aeri had asked to come over that night but you told her you were having a bad day and just weren’t in the mood. but as always, she was pushy and so used to getting what she wanted. you never said no to her. once you saw her name with an incoming call on your phone, you knew she was going to get her way whether you liked it or not. so you figured that maybe you did need someone else’s presence to make you feel better.

“do you need me to come over?”

“you don’t have to.”

“i’ll be there in an hour.”

she showed up at your door with your usual order from your favorite fried chicken shop and four bottles of soju. and for the first time in a long time, you two actually talked. she asked about your day and said everything she could to make you feel better, even half-joking that she knew enough contacts to get your boss removed from the company. it was refreshing to have an actual conversation that didn’t revolve around all the lewd things you would say to each other in the bedroom. and as aeri declared that she was going to stay the night to keep you company, it was the first time you laid in your bed without your bodies intertwining just for pleasure.

she fell asleep with her head nestled in the crook of your neck that night, and that’s when you were certain there was more to your feelings for her than just lust.

although you knew she would never feel the same for you. first of all, it wasn’t allowed as an idol. and second, aeri just wouldn’t allow herself to let you or anyone else in. so you pushed your feelings to the side, thinking they would go away eventually if you buried them deep enough. right now you were content with just being her toy if that meant that she chose you above anyone else, even if it was clearly only for the satisfaction you could give her.

after that night you fell back into the same old routine. she comes and goes as she pleases, and as always, you let her. but the next time aeri was at your apartment, she teased you as if she was fully aware of what you felt for her.

she kneeled in front of you, eyeing you with a smirk as her fingers ran along your bare thighs. “tell me, what do you want, y/n?”

“i want what you want,” you said breathlessly, letting her know you were fully in her control. she was having fun. she taunted you further.

“but what do you want?”

“you.”

“you’re crazy.” a devilish smile crossed her lips before she lowered her head in between your legs. and once you were a total mess from coming undone on her tongue, she tightly gripped your chin, forcing to make your eyes meet.

“you’re mine.”

“i’m yours, aeri.”

but she was oblivious, not knowing that she owned your heart as much as she owned your body.

the night you thought you would finally be free from the toxic cycle came a few weeks later. aeri was over again, but this time with an unfamiliar scent lingering on her skin. you ignored it at first, trying to convince yourself that she probably just changed her perfume. but as soon as you were in the sheets once more, you saw the number of fresh marks that lined her bare chest. you were certain that wasn’t your work on her body, and it made something in your brain snap.

aeri noticed your lust-filled eyes suddenly shift to a look of pain. “what the fuck, aeri.”

“what’s wrong?”

“have you been sleeping with someone else?” there was anger laced in your voice. from all your months together, it was the first time she heard you use that tone with her.

she put up her hand to caress the side of your face, thinking it would ease all the emotions you were feeling. “y/n, we talked about this. i told you this was just for fun.” but you quickly distanced yourself from her, as if you would burn at her touch. you just couldn’t hold back the tears forming in your eyes.

“i can’t do this, aeri. just leave. please.”

aeri stoop up from the bed and stared at you, stopping like she wanted to say something. but after a minute of silence, she quickly put her clothes on and headed right out the door.

you knew you couldn’t blame her. she was never your girlfriend and there was nothing even close to commitment. it was clear from the start that the predicament you were in revolved purely around the satisfaction you could give one another. but all the pain, feelings of self-doubt, and memories of crying yourself to sleep at night from your past relationship came flooding back in. the person who had gotten you out of the lowest point of your life was the same person who brought you right back. the tattoo on your arm became a constant reminder of how you were never good enough to be the only one, not even for aeri.

you fucking hated it now.

however, as the toxic pattern with her ended, you fell back into another one. you tried to fill the void in your heart with more meaningless flings and one night stands, sleeping with every other girl you could find who showed just the slightest interest in you. they kept you distracted.

but despite how hard you tried and how many women you fucked, aeri could never leave your thoughts. she was the very representation of dopamine, nothing ever compared to her rush. she was addictive, while you were fighting for your life to stay sober.

a month had gone by since that night. the first few weeks were filled with aeri’s messages and unanswered calls, but after awhile they stopped. you figured she eventually got the hint that you wanted nothing to do with her anymore. though as soon as you thought you were finally doing better, a certain night arrived accompanied with a knock on your door. and once you opened it, you were met by the same face you had been trying so hard to forget.

the aura surrounding aeri wasn’t the usual cocky one she would show up at your apartment with. there was no coy smile lined with brash self-confidence. she looked like she hadn’t slept in days, her cheeks slightly sunken compared to the last time you saw her. it wasn’t the aeri you were used to, but you could tell that the round eyes looking up at you like a puppy were the same ones you had been trying to erase from your memory.

“y/n, can we talk?”

without saying a word, you let her in.

the room was filled with a deafening silence. aeri scanned your face, looking for any signs of emotion as you stared blankly into the wall, avoiding her gaze. she let out a deep sigh before she spoke.

“i’m sorry.”

you shook your head and scoffed at her words. “no you’re not. you’re just here cause you didn’t have anyone else to play with tonight.”

“listen to me. please, y/n.” her tone shifted to desperation as her hands curled into fists. you said nothing to let her continue. “i know i said that this was all just for fun, but the weeks without you have been unbearable.”

without you knowing, aeri was having it just as rough as you were. you didn’t think she cared. but like you, she cried herself to sleep most nights, realizing you were more than just someone she came to to release all the tension from whatever was going on in her life. your absence began affecting everything around her, having to fake smiles for her members and even for the crowd when she was on stage.

but despite all the emptiness she felt, aeri didn’t fuck a single person since the day you left. she realized it wasn’t just your touch, but your whole presence that truly satisfied her.

“i missed you so much. your voice, your smile, your laugh.” you heard her voice break, making you finally look up to meet her teary eyes. “but not just that. i missed every single thing about you.” there was a sincerity in the way she spoke. your heart couldn’t help but soften.

“i don’t want anyone but you, y/n. i need you.”

without saying a word, you pulled aeri in for your lips to finally meet again. you immediately kissed each other with a hunger, both of you trying to make up for the rollercoaster of emotions you had gone through for weeks. your hands roamed around her body, retracing all the curves you tried so hard to forget, while her arms wrapped around your neck, desperately keeping you close as if you were going to disappear from her life again. aeri melted from your touch, while all it took was her soft lips for you to cave in.

“c’mon.”

with a smirk, you took her hand in yours and guided her to the bedroom. once her back landed on your familiar sheets, you wasted no time to remove the clothes separating you from pressing your bodies together. her thighs immediately fell open, inviting you to come on top of her as her legs wrapped around your body to pull you even closer.

you started with leaving soft, delicate kisses along her neck, making a sigh escape aeri’s mouth. you took your time, pressing your lips from her ears down to her collarbones to inhale the same intoxicating scent you had been without for far too long. but as your lips glided lower to her chest, the image of her marked skin from the day she broke your heart flooded into your head. it should have been the reason for you to stop, to put your foot down and be free from your addiction to her. but as if she could read your thoughts, she pulled you in to whisper what she knew you wanted to hear. “please, baby. make me yours.”

a fire ignited within you from her words. you just couldn’t hold back anymore.

you couldn’t let whoever marked her outdo you. you were going to let aeri know exactly who she belonged to.

her skin took turns in your mouth as your lips began roughly moving on her chest. you circled between her breasts and her collarbones, greedily sucking and nibbling at every piece of skin you could find. her aching nipples rolled between your tongue, making moans escape her lips that led you to lose control even further. you knew the amount of marks would be a challenge to hide for all her stage outfits, but you didn’t stop to care. and once you were satisfied with the bruised patches of art you made on her body, your fingers began moving towards her already dripping cunt.

you teased her a bit, placing agonizingly soft touches on her slit. aeri couldn’t help but push her hips into your hand, letting you know she was ready to give herself to you, begging you to fuck her senseless. it amused you to see her like this, finally the one who was whimpering and pleading. the time you were apart made her so sensitive, and you could tell just by her breathy moans that filled the room with every single touch.

you gathered up the leaking juices as you slipped a finger between her folds, using it to begin circling her clit. you couldn’t wait to taste her. but for now, you wanted to make her legs tremble just from your touch.

“i fucking missed you.”

aeri cried out the moment you slipped a finger into her. you took her lips back into your own as you slid in and out of her. the friction already had her moaning into your mouth, but you barely even started yet.

you slowly slipped in two more, and once she had managed to take you fully, you guided her into a rhythm until she could no longer control herself from the pleasure. she grabbed onto your neck, making her nails dig marks into your skin as your coated fingers pumped back and forth with ease. you knew her body like it was the back of your hand, curling and pressing your digits deeper into all the spots she loved. aeri’s delicious moans and curses fell right into your ear, and you couldn't help but lick your lips to the sounds of her pleasure.

but as soon as you knew she was growing close, you slid your fingers out of her right before she spilled over the edge. the sudden stop left her whimpering, begging for release. you could have ended it there, making a statement to let her know who really owned her body. but you weren’t evil, and you couldn’t deny you missed her. you weren’t done with her just yet.

“i want you to come on my tongue.”

all aeri could do was nod and let out a breathy moan at your words, already imagining your warm tongue buried inside her. you motioned for her to sit up on the bed as you situated yourself between her legs, letting her get a better view to watch every single flick your tongue was about to do on her aching cunt.

you left open-mouthed kisses all over her thighs, teasing her once more as your lips slowly made their way to her already dripping pussy. she was left on the edge from having your fingers in her, and now the anticipation of feeling your tongue was driving her insane.

she spread her legs even further, inviting you to come and devour her. and when you decided she finally deserved what she wanted, your pink tongue licked a long stripe that parted her folds, letting you savor her delicious juices. she always tasted so sweet.

“you taste so fucking good, baby.”

she gasped the moment she felt your tongue reach her swollen bud. you began moving your jaw up and down at a steady pace, weaving through her folds and circling her clit. her eyes were filled with pleasure as you stared into them, and she couldn’t help but grip your head to let you know she was enjoying every second of you between her thighs.

“oh my god,” she said breathlessly as her eyes broke contact to throw her head back. “don’t stop.”

her words encouraged you to keep pleasuring her. your flicks became faster and your tongue pressed even tighter on her skin. you don’t dare to stop. and from the way her body reacts, you can tell she was getting closer and closer to the edge. her back arches and a string of moans escape her lips as her nails dig even deeper into your scalp.

but it wasn’t enough, you needed to taste her even more. you decided to take things further. catching aeri off guard, your arms grip around her legs, lifting them to be spread wider to plunge your tongue from her clit to right inside her dripping hole. her mouth fell open, and every sound that comes from her plump lips makes you give into your own desire, even more eager to please.

“yes, baby. fuck me with your tongue.”

you did exactly as she told you, sliding in and out of her, her walls clenching on the warm muscle with every lick. aeri couldn’t help but hump your face from the pleasure, pushing you deeper into her cunt to allow your tongue to go further. you were on a high from her taste, continuing to drink her juices straight from its core.

from the tip of your nose rubbing against her bud and the feeling of your tongue buried inside her, she was left melting from the sensation. her breaths got shorter and shorter and she could no longer resist the heat rising in her body. she was right on the edge.

with a loud gasp of your name, aeri finally came undone on your tongue. your eyes never breaking contact, watching intently as her face twisted in pleasure. her legs tremble and her thighs attempt to close around your head but you force them open, sinking your fingers into her milky skin, leaving bruises to keep her in place. you don’t let her pull away. you weren’t done until you said so. your tongue continued to savor her juices, licking every single drop until she couldn’t take it anymore.

once she came down from her high, you settled beside aeri on the bed, reaching for her hips to pull her closer. she turned to you, and with her lips forming a soft smile, she looked into your eyes as she whispered the words you had so desperately been waiting for her to say.