I'm autistic. Sometimes I fuck up. When I realize I have, I not only apologize but I take action. I DO something to show that I know better now and I'm sorry and want to make things right. Sometimes I realize it on my own. Sometimes it takes somebody else pointing it out. But in the end, I want to put good out into the world.
If I accidentally used a gesture, symbol, or phrase that turned out to be strongly tied to bigotry, I WOULD BE UPSET!!! I'd be embarrassed and try to explain myself sure (especially if it was also tied to something benign in my own culture), but I'd also sincerely apologize to the people I inadvertently hurt. I'd do things like go into a deep dive on the subject so I could better understand, spread awareness, interact with organizations I was pointed towards by people in the community, and try my best to do better and make plans on how to approach it from then on. My autism might be an acceptable reason why I mess up sometimes, but it's not an excuse for me continuing to make that mistake and refusing to take ownership of my actions.
Autism is not a blank check to do whatever I please just because autistic. Autism does not mean I'm exempt from all consequences or criticism. Autism doesn't mean I get to hand-wave away my responsibilities of kindness and empathy. People (rather the person themself or those surrounding them) using autism as a catch all excuse for any actions and refuse to learn and grow? They not only upset me; they are used as an example that people point at when they treat me as less than who I am. It hurts.
