I think, I'm in the last stage of grief.
The first stage is DENIAL. I was in shock and I always wonder how can I move on with my life without him. I always try to find simple ways to get through each day like working 12hours a day or watching movies which I didn't even finish any movie I started. DONE.
The Second stage is ANGER. This was the time I was asking God thru my prayers, "WHY IS IT ALWAYS TO BE ME WHO'S ALWAYS BEING HURT AFTER ALL THE LOVE I GAVE?". After all the sacrifices that I had done for him, and this is all I got, pain! DONE.
The third stage is BARGAINING. After all the anger I felt, I started to feel guilty like maybe all the things that I had done wasn't enough or maybe It was all my fault all of the sudden that made him change his feelings towards me or maybe If only I did more than what he expected for me to do, maybe we were still together. DONE.
The fourth stage is DEPRESSION. This was the time that I asked myself, if I will be lost forever, will he be happy? This was the time I was really in the midst of sadness and wondering to still go on with my life. DONE.
The Last stage is ACCEPTANCE. Acceptance is often confused of being "all right" or being "okay" with what happen but It was never okay nor all right when you're in pain, rather, this is the stage where I am experiencing right.
After all the denial, anger, bargaining and depression, And after being sick due to stress, lack of sleep and not eating enough, I realized that I have to ACCEPT what is gone because it is already done. I will try to live with. I am not saying that I am fully recovered from pain he caused me but I have to MOVED ON with my life, CHANGE, GROW, and EVOLVE. I will begin to LIVE AGAIN. Praying to my almighty, God the Father, that if this is the path that I should pass to get to the destination that is meant for me, then I ACCEPT IT. ONGOING.....
