#blessedbeyond

Before, I used to think that my service was futile because it didn’t seem to bear fruit. During the time I served as the assistant team leader for a Christian Life Program for Singles for Christ, we had fewer participants who dedicated, and I thought that meant my service was not fruitful.

But I was wrong. I realized that I had been measuring fruitfulness only by numbers--by how many singles would dedicate--and not by the other blessings God was pouring out in our midst.

After that 12-week program, I saw how the Singles for Christ and Youth for Christ ministries grew closer. Some of our participants even came from YFC, and that strengthened the bond between our communities. Personally, I also became closer to those serving in YFC. I began to understand their daily struggles and how, despite those challenges, they continue to serve God faithfully. Through that experience, I realized that our service truly brought life to others.

Today, I’m reminded that the Lord never gives up on us. I am not perfect, but I have a perfect God who always tends to my needs as I serve Him.

When I encountered this question, I immediately remembered my reaction during a group discussion in one of the Christian Life Programs where I served last night.

During the discussion, I caught myself thinking, “If I were the discussion leader, I would do this and that instead.” Almost instantly, I felt guilty. I realized that pride had quietly entered my heart, so I prayed and asked God to purify it.

Sometimes I ask myself if it’s only me who gets distracted during Mass. In those moments, I can’t help but wonder, “Am I truly His daughter, feeling this way?”

So today, before hearing Mass--and as part of my prayer routine--I knelt before the Lord in the Adoration Chapel, asking Him to spare me from negative and worldly thoughts, not only during Mass but also in my daily life.

Thankfully, the Gospel reading during Mass today spoke about freedom (Luke 13:10–17) --the kind of freedom that comes from God. It reminded me that God’s love is what truly guides me through this life.

Once again, I asked the Lord to guide my heart, mind, and body to seek only Him--to free me from worldly distractions and from my own sinfulness.

Today, I attended an inter-faith gathering together with some of my colleagues and other affiliates. The topic was about "Sex Abuse Victims Speak: How Healing and Justice Take Place and the Role of NCFC."

In all honesty my stay there was not only an eye opener to what is not being discussed publicly for it is disgusting to some if not to all: Sexual Abuse... and its victims mostly children, teenagers, women.

And in today's gospel the Lord challenges us. To cultivate compassion even if it is uncomfortable. Because in the first hand, it is much more uncomfortable to those who have suffered from that abuse. But to stand with them instead, as Jesus did.

To deepen my empathy. To just listen to them. Just listen. Sabi nga sa session, we have to be aware of these things. Next is to awareness is being involved.

And that even I am also struggling, I pray to be an active co-healer. That I may be one whom can be a safe place to them when or if time comes that my help will be needed.

And that while attending numerous activities as part of my covenant to the Lord thru the community that I am in, I may also be an active Christ advocate of those not yet in the community.

I have a friend from the same faith community Even though we are best of friends we oftentimes misunderstand each other.

While the rift between us would last only for a few hours or a day, it's difficult. Sometimes I am very much eager to fly back to the province to check whether the feeling is still the same when we argued things online or is it not during face-to-face arguments.

We often agree on the same ideas, especially regarding our faith. But may be because of the delivery that we often clash. Too much familiarity to each other's tendencies ika nga.

And in today's gospel I am reminded of how we should handle disagreements.

We start with humility. Knowing and accepting that we have different realities and there are things that we need to also figure out. That our faith is our relationship to God and so to each other and eventually towards others.

To lead with love rather than corrections. I should first ask myself this, "Is what I’m about to say or do leading my friend or someone closer to love [God], or pushing them away?"

As the priest said in his homily today, "The Heart of Jesus is merciful. He forgives. The Heart of Jesus is charitable. He loves. And the Heart of Jesus is life. So that we will be united."

To listen more actively not because there might be things to argue with rather listen to understand the person so as to understand myself as well.

Little did I know that I was actually referring to the Holy Eucharistic Celebration. The very reason of going to the shrine. I smiled at the realization because at that moment my stomach just rumbles. Haha

When I arrived, I spent the first few minutes at the Adoration Chapel. While in prayer, I saw an image of a nun praying. In that moment, I knew I was being invited to pray for vocations--not just for myself, but for all of humanity.

This was affirmed just before the entrance procession when the commentator asked the faithful to pray the Vocation Prayer. And at this time, it reminded me to pray for my own vocation, too.

And in the Mass today, the Lord reminded me to ask for the guidance of Our Guardian Angels. To be honest, I’m not very familiar with the prayer to them--I usually only recite it when others do.

So, I prayed: Lord, may I be able to recite the prayer to Your Angels not only by mouth but by heart. To have a child-like heart that is in total dependence and trust in you. To which I would also trust the people around me.

"As they were going along the road, someone said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go. And Jesus said to him, “Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head.”

Is the same with asking me this:

“Are you sure? Because following Me means giving up even basic comforts.”

I may have known about this but..

Just like today. So, I prayed the Holy Rosary.

Before I began, I noticed the image of Our Lady of Perpetual Help.

And only after finishing the Rosary did I become aware of the quiet presence of Our Merciful God.

Sometimes, when I struggle, the presence of God is being unnoticed. Not because He is not there but because I am fixated to the things I am struggling with.