THE ONLY EXCEPTION | SHUNSUI K.
story synopsis: After successfully surviving the war against the quincies, you end up reminiscing about your shared childhood, and the few drinks you share with Shunsui lead to a lot of unwanted honesty.
content warning: some bleach spoilers (post quincy war), canon mixed with non-canon, major character death, shunsui kyoraku x reader, reader referred to as woman once, reader suffers from insomnia, cursing, alcohol consumption, yearning, teasing, coming to terms with feelings, slight angst, reminiscing, confessions, L-bomb, fluff, reader is his lieutenant, kissing, no explicit nsfw but suggestive ending.
word count: 2.6K
YOU COULDN'T REMEMBER the last time you spent your night so peacefully without worries and uncertainities clouding your mind. Your eyes lazily scanned the surrounding as you tried to figure out what item was currently in front of you with only its sillhouette as hint in the darkened room. One thing hadn't changed though: falling asleep was still the same old, impossible task. No matter how many times you managed to fall asleep, you'd wake back up, even more wide awake than the last time.
"Fuckin' hell." You groaned, sitting up straight. Your hands moved towards your face, groggily rubbing your eyes, ridding yourself of any last traces of tiredness. The clock struck one, and you let out a sigh. "This is ridiculous."
Knowing there was no use in trying to fall back asleep you pushed aside the warm blanket before standing up, feeling a little dizzy from the sudden motion. Once you turned the light on you looked around, wondering what to do next. "I could make myself something to eat. That should work." You muttered to yourself, dragging your feet towards the small kitchen. You decided on instant noodles, a quick but effective bite that should help time pass a little faster. Just as you were about to add the finishing touches to your lame excuse of a "dinner", you heard a knock on your door. At this hour? Strange.
"Who's there?" Your voice came out a little hoarse, and you internally cursed yourself for the tinge of fear that was audible in it. Get a grip, [name]! You thought, rubbing your temple. You're a shinigami! A lieutenant at that! You shouldn't be afraid of an insignificant late night visitor!
You stood there for a moment longer, hearing another knock strike your door. Insistent huh? Knowing that whoever it was probably wouldn't walk away until you opened the door, you finally made your way towards it, opening it oh-so carefully.
"What is your problem it is o— Captain?" You tilted your head up, surprised to see the all too familiar figure standing at your doorstep. "Hey, [name]." "Hey.. Uhm. How did you know I was awake." The male shot you a dumbfounded look before letting out a hearty chuckle. "Your lights were turned on, idiot." "Oh.." You awkwardly rubbed the back of your neck while your other hand still held onto the doorknob. "Wanna come in?"
Soon enough you found yourself making another bowl of noodles for your captain — who also happened to be your best friend.
"So.. Capta–" "How many times do I have to tell you again. Drop those fancy titles. Just call me Shinsui." You shrugged, slurping down the last remains of your food. "Hey, it's a force of habit." "I think you just like calling me captain, is that it hm?" His smug remark made you choke on the restants of food you were about to swallow, causing Shinsui to burst out laughing. "Idiot. Don't say weird shit like that." "Force of habit I guess." He said, mimicking your words with an all too joyous smile.
AFTER YOU FINISHED washing up the dishes you noticed the male rummaging through your fridge. Confused you walked up to him, curious to see what he was searching for. "Got any booze?" You rolled your eyes, gently pushing him aside to fish out a bottle of sake from the lowest drawer. "At this hour?"
Soon enough you find yourself following behind him as he led the two od you towards a more secluded part of town. "Isn't this someone's yard?" You asked, confused as he sat down onto what seemed to be remains of a porch. "Was." The words sunk in and your lips formed a thin line as you nodded. "Right. Now that I think about it, this part seems like a ghost town." "It certainly feels like it."
He gestured for you to come closer, opening the brand new bottle of sake as you sat down next to him, feet slightly dangling in the air.
"How come you're still awake at this hour?" Shunsui chugged down a good amount of alcohol before wiping his mouth, eyes squeezing shut for a second before handing the bottle back to you. "Patrol duty." You mimicked his gesture, less successfully though, feeling the liquid burn in your throat. "Right."
The silence felt heavy, but you took the opportunity to admire his rather worn out features. The war had changed them. Changed him. The carefreeness he once held had dissapeared, making place for a different type of attitude. One you couldn't quite explain. The smile he wore on his lips seemed rather shallow and that glimmer in his eyes had long since dissapeared.
Almost as if instinctual, his eyes glanced towards you, catching you red handed. You quickly looked away, downing yet another sip of strong liquid.
"I though you didn't like drinking?" You handed him the bottle again and this time he screwed the lid back on before putting it aside. "Maybe it'll make me tired."
You couldn't decipher the look in his eyes as you started to feel a little dizzy. "You're still struggling with sleeping? You should've told me." You sighed at his words, warily shaking your head. "What could you have possibly done to help me sleep, Shunsui?" One of his hands moved towards your head, gently placing itself on top of it. "Oh, come on. You used to be the first one to fall asleep during our sleepovers, [name]." "That was ages ago! We were kids!" He playfully rolled his eyes in response to your protests. "What about last week, hm?"
Memories of last week came back to you. That's right. You were over at his place to discuss some important matters, just to fall asleep in the middle of the meeting. "Did you really have to remind me of that? I was trying to forget that!" You complained, crossing your arms together. The brunette couldn't help but laugh, finding your attitude adorable to say the least. His hand ruffled your hair before moving back towards his lap where his other hand rested.
"You fell asleep with your head on the table. I could pretty much feel your back pain. I had to move you to my bed."
The thought of him picking you up and carrying you towards his bed? It drove you crazy. But you knew that it was probably nothing out of the ordinary for him. You were friends after all, right?
"Sorry about that. I didn't expect to fall asleep." He looked at you with a puzzled expression. "What are you apologizing for? I'm just glad you feel safe enough to fall asleep around me. You've barely slept since everything that happened."
He didn't have to remind you. The loss of many comrades had scarred you deeply. Your insomnia had gotten worse, accompanied by lifelike nightmares reminding you of the passing of friends and families, acquintances and passerbys.
"You miss him, don't you?" His voice called out. You swallowed hard. "You shouldn't be that worried about me. You have it worse. Ukitake and I were nowhere as close as you two were. And you lost Captain Yamamoto too." Your words came out whisperlike and the grief in his eyes became more prominent.
"Well yeah, I do. I miss them a lot. But I have my way of dealing with feelings. You on the other hand.."
"Are you calling me incapable of dealing with them?"
"No? Don't twist my words like that."
You rolled your eyes, reaching out for the bottle of sake to finish up the restant of it, but he didn't let you. Shunsui clicked his tongue as the bottle dissapeared beneath his cloak.
"That's enough for tonight. You have to be up early tomorrow."
"Yeah, right. Am I gonna spend my whole day filling out paperwork and solving minor issues?"
"I thought you enjoyed peaceful jobs that don't require assistance from anyone else?"
"I do. I just..." Your words slurred, and Shunsui's interested was piqued. "Hm?"
"I just... I miss spending time with you.."
The brunette's eyes widened. Was this the alcohol talking? Truth be told, drunken words were often filled with honesty, but he couldn't quite believe them. Not when they came from you.
EVER SINCE HE got promoted to captain-commander the two of you hadn't spent a lot of time together. Soul society had to be rebuilt, deaths had to be griefed, victory had to be celebrated and duties had to be carried out until the very end. The male was lucky enough to promote you with him, making you his very own right hand, like you had always been. Like it was meant to be. But he had neglected you, and he knew that all too well.
"I do too, [name]. But you know how hectic everything has been lately."
You sighed, nodding in agreement.
"That's exactly why I didn't want to tell you. I guess my mouth just got ahead of me." The nervous giggle you used to try and cover your disapointment was fruitless as Shinsui's gaze turned more concerned.
"I'm glad you told me. I want you to be honest with me."
He lifted his hand up, moving it towards your face to cup your cheek. Flinching away would do no good. He couldn't know of the effect he had on you, so you stayed as still as you possibly could, gazing into his beautiful eyes.
"I don't wanna add any more burdens onto you."
"Why would you think your worries are burdens to me? You're being ridiculous, you know that right?"
"I'm not being ridiculous, Shunsui. You've got a huge responsibility now. Who am I to whine about what bothers me?"
"You're my best friend, [name]."
In any other situation, the title would've felt like a huge relief. But with the feelings bubbling inside your chest and the butterflies in your stomach you couldn't help but feel disatisfied by his words. He gently tucked away a strand of hair behind your ear before continuing.
"We promised we'd tell each other anything. Was there ever any issues we were not able to tackle?"
You laughed, thinking about all the schemes and tricks you two had up your sleeves growing up. The amount of times you were able to evade any consequences with the help of your wits and charms were laughable to say the least.
"True. Remember when you broke Yamamoto's favorite vase?" Shinsui groaned at the unpleasant memory, flicking his fingers against your forehead.
"I had a bad stomach ache for days from all the bullshit we pulled out. We managed to perfectly replicate it thanks to you though." He thought for a while before a smile tugged at his lips. "What about that time you broke Aizen's sword, hm?"
"Hey I thought we wouldn't bring that up again!"
"You brought the vase up too, it's only fair!"
YOU DIDN'T KNOW how much time had passed since the two of you started reminiscing about your childhood, recalling everything that had happened that ultimately brought you closer. It was strange to think how far you had come. How far he had come. And you felt your heart swell with pride at the achievements of the man that owned your heart.
"Crazy. I can't believe all of that was years ago."
"Tell me about it. If you would've told me back then that you'd become captain-commander I wouldn't have believed you."
"You know what I can't believe? That you've stuck around for so long. I thought I would've driven you crazy already."
"Who says you haven't?"
"I know you love me..!"
"Yeah."
The words came out quicker than you imagined yet the damage had already been done. Your face turned red as you looked away and frantically started coughing.
"As friends! I love you as friends! Yeah, best friends even!"
His hand settling on your shoulder was enough to calm you down, yet the embarrassment still filled you to the brim.
"Hey now. Calm down."
"I am calm. What are you talking about."
"Ofcourse you are."
Feeling defeated you looked away, only for his fingers to carefully grab your chin, tilting your face back towards him. If only he knew how cruel he was, treating you the way he was right now.
"You can't just do that to me.." He whispered lowly, the words sending a shiver down your spine.
"Do what?"
"Say something like that and then pretend it's a mistake. You're playing with my heart, [name]"
"What?"
He inched closer, and you could feel his warm breath ghosting over your lips.
"Do you know how long i've waited to hear those words come out of your pretty mouth?"
"Shinsui..."
"Fuck. You're driving me crazy."
"Back off, you're drunk!" You yelped, jolting up. There was no way he wasn't under the influence right now.
"I'm as sober as I could possibly be."
"Prove it. Walk a straight line."
Shinsui burst out laughing at your strange request but decided to humor it. He had nothing to lose after all. Once he gracefully stood up he marched up to you in the straightest line that you had ever seen. He tilted his head down to meet your gaze, smiling endearingly at the annoyance painted on your face.
"Is that enough proof, [nickname]?"
"I guess."
Satisfied, he pulled you into a hug. Your senses were overwhelmed by the intoxicating smell of cherry blossom that accompanied him. Soon enough he pulled away just about enough to look you in the eyes.
"I know this is sudden. And trust me, I don't want you to feel forced into saying something you don't mean to share just yet. We can forget about this all if that's what you want."
You shook your head. If you were to deny it all the chance of muttering up the courage again would be impossibly low. No, you had to accept what happened and be honest with yourself and with him. He deserved it.
"No, no. It's okay. I don't want to forget about this. Shinsui, I.." You swallowed, trying to find the right words for this sticky situation.
"It's true. I love you. But not just as a friend. As something more."
The sparkle in his eyes returned, and the crinkles under his eyes reappeared as his smile turned genuine.
"This seems too good to be true."
"Oh, shut it. Stop smiling like that!"
"I can't. I'm so happy."
His smile was infectiuos and you found yourself joining in as you held onto him, enjoying the heartfelt moment you shared.
"I love you, [name]! I love you so much!"
Hearing him say those three words with such ease was shocking to say the least. You couldn't understand why he didn't struggle with it. Meanwhile you were a nervous mess in his arms.
"Quiet! You're gonna wake the neighbours!"
"To be frank, that's the least of my concern right now!"
His eyes bore into yours and you noticed the way they flickered towards your lips. You knew what he wanted, and if you had to be honest, you wanted it too. After a moment of hesitation you nodded and he wasted no time crashing his lips against yours, meeting them in a passionate rythm. The warmth of his mouth drove you crazy as your arms wrapped around his neck, holding onto him like a mad woman. One of his arms snuck around your waist while the other creeped onto the back of your head, gently taking ahold of your hair as he deepened the kiss. Your tongues mingled together, mixing in the strong taste of sake. It seemed like hours had passed oncr the two of you finally parted, breathless and excited.
"That was even better than I imagined."
"I didn't know you were such a good kisser, Shunsui."
"There's a lot you don't know about me. I bet you're curious to find out, no?"
"You read my mind!"
And that was all he needed to lift you over his shoulder and take you back to your small apartment, ready to show you all the things he wished to do to you ever since the moment you captured his heart.
Who needed sleep anyway?
©mrsbarou — please do not copy / translate / claim my work as your own!
