#beyond series

11. (tied) Beyond Shame (Noelle/Jasper)/Beyond Control (Lex/Dallas): Noelle and Lex are great characters. I just cannot get into their sex lives. Best part of these books is meeting the gang and seeing the early/original relationships.

10. Beyond Temptation (Emma/Noah): after trying to not focus on the age difference or the fact that Emma brings, basically, nothing to the gang, you’re not really left with much to enjoy.

9. Beyond Ecstacy (Jeni/Hawke): best part of this one is the rising tension, danger, and ultimately the start of the war with Eden. I ❤️ Alya & Shipp. Jeni and Hawke are fine once Hawke matures a little.

8. Beyond Surrender (Nessa/Ryder): this one feels like a much more conventional romance, without the kink, which results in a very sweet and dramatic, but not terribly spicy, end to the series.

7. Beyond Possession (Tatiana/Zan): I like them, and it’s an interesting look at Sector 4 from the view of an outsider to the gang. Zan avoids Ford’s mistakes and I love him for it.

6. Beyond Innocence (Lily/Jared): I would not have clocked these two as a match in a million years, but it manages to be sexy and sweet. Plus the danger of Eden gets more real!

5. Beyond Solitude (Mia/Ford): it is porn, but that’s what we’re here for isn’t it? I identify with Ford, perhaps a bit too much (took me three rereads to understand how he screws up!). This one is porn with heart and I love them together.

4. Beyond Addiction (Trix/Finn): this relationship should not work, as they both fell for the person they used to be. But it does work because they also fall for the new person. I love Finn’s complete devotion to Trix, in a very Lan-to-Nynaeve way.

3. Beyond Ruin (Mad/Dylan/Jade/Scarlett): do I understand how this is supposed to work? No. Am I confused by the mechanics? Yes. Is it hot anyway? Absolutely. Throw in the lore of Section One and the politics heating up, and this is excellent drama.

2. Beyond Jealousy (Rachel/Cruz/Ace): look, these three are absolutely 🔥🔥🔥 together, and that is really what the Beyond Series is all about.

* Sounds like Ryder has some rage issues to work out underneath all the calm.

* Is everyone kind of uncomfortable if Nessa sits in on the orgies? They all treat her like the kid sister, so it’s not like they are inviting her to join them, and sounds like any of her partners are very casual and wouldn’t get an invite to the party.

* Penelope is a direct referrence to Penelope Garcia on Criminal Minds, right?

* Cerys and Jim Jernigan is…not hot.

* “Ink was forever. Nessa still felt too...impulsive.” I have never in my life wanted a tattoo, mostly for Nessa-like reasons, but after I read this series I’m always kind of like, I should really get a cool tattoo. (I still do not have any tattoos.)

* Ryder is just into gulping down beverages that weren’t meant to be consumed that way, isn’t he.

* Ryder wears underwear and this is exactly what I would expect of him (I don’t think any other guy in the Sectors does).

* Their post-coital pillow talk is very cute and sweet.

* Poor Tank. We barely knew you.

* But Flash dying. He’s barely on the page except as Amira’s lover and baby daddy, but he’s been there from the start. The first of the O’Kane men to make it official, to make a kid. Him dying right at the end? With things left to do with Amira and Hana? Yeah, my heart is breaking.

* You start getting the Riders and Ryder in the same scene and it’s a little funny.

* The Riders are just on another level. I mean, Sector One is just a whole other level already, and then the Riders are this religious fanatic death machine. Absolutely crazy.

* Of course Ryder just climbs 21 flights of stairs like it’s nothing. I’m exhausted just thinking about it. I am just going to pretend the solider on the landing is just a really, really bad Special Tasks person who managed to get snuck up on by a guy who was climbing 21 flights of stairs below him, apparently completely silently, without gasping for air or anything.

* Look, Dallas isn’t going to die. It’s not that kind of story.

* Justice for Peterson being a terrible person is very satisfying. But I honestly would have liked it better if the crowd had a chance to rip him to pieces right then.

* Ending with Amira and Hana at the ocean, like Flash promised? 😫

Bottom line: Nessa is impulsive and passionate, and only gets serious about Dallas’ liquor. Ryder has been trained to be a solider and spy and has never dreamed or been impulsive in his life. They compliment each other better than you might think. Also the plot wraps up and it’s sad and sweet and not very kinky but satisfying.

Beyond Ecstacy: Hawk/Jeni, Kit Rocha, Beyond Series

* With this one I’m here for the plot rather than the porn. The plot is getting all dramatic and tense and dark just like I like it!

* “concealing generosity under a veneer of selfishness was practically Dallas's trademark”: which is why we all love Dallas.

* Look, I could go on about these two, but the whole thing is so awkward and ass backward and I’m not a fan. I’ll just focus on the rest of the story. But I do really hate that Hawk is forty. He comes across as younger/more immature in his approach to Jeni. In his twenties or thirties? Sure. I assume also that, based on her shows and stuff, he knows already that she likes a little bit of pain and dominance? So he’s not just foisting his fantasies on who he thinks she is? Also, he basically proposed to her, having romanced her in his head for months, but she’s barely spoken to him. Why she doesn’t go screaming for the hills I don’t understand.

* Now Alya and Shipp is totally worth it. Older woman who’s been crushed and not allowed to flourish, younger guy who comes in blazing and determined who upends their world and gives them hope and purpose for something better? And then he has to pursue her to convince her to give him a chance? And he’s totally worth it? Yeah, that’s definitely a book I would read.

* I appreciate the acknowledgement that herbs are medicine and as a result can have side effects that should be monitored for, and that dosage is important.

* “He wove the rest of the O'Kanes into this fantasy future of his so easily.” I do like Hawk’s sappy dreams about a wonderful future.

* I bet Tatiana will want to have a word with the guy who kneed Zan in the crotch.

* The creepy/sad suicides-by-Eden’s-death-wall were pretty terrible. But it turning out they were the murders of spies when Eden was cleaning house? Uff.

* Making emotionally charged decisions in the middle of a disaster? Terrible idea.

* Not Shipp! 😭😭😭

* Ashwin continues to be cool. First, Bren was the scariest guy on the compound, then he yielded the title to Cruz. And Cruz is nervous around Ashwin.

* “You ruined us,” he rasped. “You killed us both.” Well that’s a terrible line, Hawk.

* People making snap decisions under the threat of life or death and assuming they can’t walk them back when the circumstances change.

* Big John's gaze sharpened. “That's rough.” This has big Zuko-to-Sokka energy, lol.

* “When you tried to save my life, all I could hear was you saying that I'd be fine without you. But you were also saying that you loved me too much to let me die. And if we love each other that much, so much we'd die for it, then it seems pretty stupid not to try to live for it, too.” See what not being in the middle of a crisis and having a chance to think about what you want to say will get you, Hawk?

* Ok, the wedding at the funeral was very sweet.

* “Shut them down. Start with the power grid. Let's see how those fancy motherfuckers like the dark.” Love how this series starts with a barbarian king who likes to host orgies and drinks whiskey like water, but evolves into everyone becoming a whole lot more!

Bottom line: the romance is fine in the end, but Hawk comes on waaaay too strong at first. But the drama! War! Bad guys are really bad! The good guys have to pull together and it’s time to fight! Love it.

* I love all the lore and complex dynamics of Sector One. Like, how is every other Sector a post apocolyptic dystopia, and Sector One is all hippies and free love and cult-like, fanatical worship of the ruling family? It’s such an anomaly. It’s fascinating.

* I should say that in my head Jade is played by Priyanka Bose, as Alanna on The Wheel of Time. Voice and everything.

* I like this group, but I have a hard time wrapping my head around having that many people in a relationship. It just seems like so many personalities and preferences and feelings to manage. I get anxious and exhausted just thinking about it.

* “There was freedom in not having to be everything, all by yourself. There was joy in sharing the victory.”

* The entirety of Mad’s past is a tragic romance and I love it (because I love it when my fictional heros go through the wringer). Carter and Adriana? I ship them forever.

* "My life?" Dylan echoed with a laugh. "My life doesn't mean a goddamn thing—not without you in it."

* Look, I’m not being a prude. But Dylan just made a very significant declaration for Mad, and they have all this tension between them. But suddenly the entire event is about Mad and Scarlet? And the Dylan and Jade. I just find polyamory to be very complicated. I’m trying to wrap my head around it.

* I do love Dallas for giving everyone in the gang a free pass to ditch since there will be war. I really wish Flash and Amira had taken him up on it.

* Cruz, Rachel, and Ace announcing their pregnancy takes me back to the bonus chapter where the kids got conceived, and 🔥🥵😊

* I love when the doctors get seduced by the good guys with promises of medical resources to better take care of people. ❤️

* The scene back at the compound makes more sense. Maybe because it’s less fantasy and everyone understands the others a little better. The dom/boss role just seems exhausting.

* What happened to the boys born into Sector 2?

* I like the moments between pairs of them, when we get a better understanding of the individual relationships among the whole.

* Jade being ruthless is such a shock. “A good leader didn't ask people to do things they weren't willing to do.” I think in part because most executions have either wound up as self defense or happened off screen (Six beating Trent to death, and Finn killing Mac maybe being the exceptions?). Hadn’t really thought about it before. For all Dallas’s ruthlessness, it’s the women in this series that perform some of the most serious violence. Another thing to love about it!

* “This was what Jade was made for, to use every scrap of training from Cerys to tear down the world Cerys had built.”

* Uff. That fight scene is tense. (It’s also very dramatic and I have a hard time following everyone’s insights and personal takes and interpretations of other people’s motives. Two people is complicated. Four is a gordian’s knot!)

* “Jyoti was the part of her that wanted to run Sector Two. Not needed to or felt obligated to. Wanted to. Because she was smart, and she was strong, and she trusted herself to use power for the right damn reasons. Jyoti was the part of her that loved fiercely. Scarlet first, because she'd sung her back to life. And then Dylan, because he'd walked away from the darkness to be a hero and was the only one who didn't see it. And Mad. Adrian. Trapped, just like her, between two lives and two names, torn between the need to fight and the terror of becoming the evil people had to fight.” This is the group in a nutshell, I think.

* Ugh, the plot gets so thick in this book! I love it! The tension! The stakes!

Bottom line: I am confused and turned on and totally on board with everything happening even when I don’t understand it. It’s hot polyamory and dystopian tension and I love it.

* I read the prompts for this and was, like, the sector whore and the traumatized virgin get together? There is no way this works. But then it does work!

* “it turns out it's never too late to start giving a damn."

* I love both that Lili loves to cook, and that no one else in the O’Kanes has any interest. How Dallas hasn’t recruited a chef before now boggles the mind, but it works out perfectly here.

* And she loves the piano, too!

* "Because the piano will mean more to you than the money did to me." ❤️

* “Maybe that was what drew her to him, more deeply than the proper suits and polished shoes. He felt familiar because he was as shined and buffed as she'd always been, a person made up of all the talents and interests other people desired.”

* "Sector Four has no need for trophies, but it can always use food and music." ❤️

* “Cruz's expression stayed serious. "Don't underestimate how far I'll go to protect Ace's heart." I adore Cruz/Rachel/Ace.

* Ya’all, I was *still* so confused about the Mad/Jade/Dylan/Scarlet thing at this point. Wasn’t Mad just spitting angry about Jade a book or two back? And He and Dylan maybe had a thing? What’s this with Scarlet now? Who’s going to wind up with who? 🤦🏼‍♀️

* Also, I just visited the Grand Canyon, and it was pretty breath taking. So that’s the kind of view Mad gets with Scarlet.

* Jared getting Lili to have her first orgasm? 🔥 With the addition of the thruple across the room, and the promise of more? 🔥🔥

* I love that Cruz taught Jared how to protect himself, and even more that it was because he was protecting Ace.

* The pillow talk afterward, and where he watches her play piano, are what I like about Lili and Jared.

* Ashwin! He’s very scary.

* “Finally, finally he wasn't catering to her. He wasn't building a fantasy. He was trapped in his own, and she was part of it.” Orgies are complicated, but this is hot.

* "Because I won't let you." Oh, Jared. You normally know the right thing to say, and this is definitely not it.

* “She could be steel when she had to be, as hard as Lex, as ruthless as Dallas.” “She wasn't the desert or the flowers. She wasn't ice or steel. She was a goddamn diamond, formed under terrible pressure, as hard and unforgiving as the rock Logan had put on her finger. And she'd cut the fuck out of anyone who didn't get out of her way.” I love Lili coming into her own!

* “She'd fight for him. She'd crawl for him. Whichever one it took.”

* The authors are forcing me to contemplate the math. Jared was a whore for longer than Lili has been alive. Why are all the men, including Hawk and Noah (who both come across as much younger than they are), so much older than the women??

* “Nothing was more fragile, more precious, than the moment Jared trusted her so much that he stopped trying to be her fantasy. Instead, she got to be his.” Gah, I love Jared and Lili.

Bottom line: what should have been the odd couple is actually really sweet. Lili learns she is much stronger than anyone, including herself, expected. Jared learns he has a partner who loves him for who he really is.

* “It was intoxicating, the thought that he could want her that hard, that much.”

* I suppose I should like this one more than I do. Super smart tech genius nurses long-suppressed feelings for his dead best friend’s little sister, who had crushed on him hard and now is suddenly all grown up, making her own choices and embracing her sexuality. Probably something about Emma just not being my type? I guess part of it is I still don’t know what she does, or what she brings to the gang that she got tatted in.

* "I'm not leaving you, Noah. If there's gonna be a fight, I'll be here. Watching your back." No one had, not since Cib had gone off the rails. So many years of being alone, exhausted, and if having her was too good to be true, having her like this was some kind of cracked fantasy. A woman, a lover, a partner--“

* The bondage doesn’t do it for me. Probably doesn’t help that even the sex isn’t that interesting.

* Wanting to smile made him crazy, but he couldn't help it. She was deadly and she could take care of herself, and if shit went sideways and he couldn't be a part of the life she was going to build... She'd be okay. Emmaline Cibulski didn't need rescuing.” But I like the other parts of this, that he finds not the kid he left behind but someone who can be his equal. I mean, it shouldn’t work, like Finn/Trix shouldn’t work because the years of memories are about loving the person they were. They just get lucky they happen to like the person each has become.

* I mean, aside from exposing how big a piece of shit her brother was, is the fact that Noah was the one who bought her a big deal? Clearly he never came seeking payment. Unless she thinks now that the reason he finally gets to have her is because he owns her? But it doesn’t jive with his actions to date.

* “Yeah, Emmaline Cibulski could fucking well take care of herself.”

* Ok, so Ford screws up by trying to buy Mia’s freedom, Zan pays attention and doesn’t try to buy out Tatiana, Finn has to apologize for being a scapegoat, and Noah’s only crime is not telling Emma her brother was a piece of shit. Pardon my metaphor repetition, I’m annoyed.

* I mean, at least she gets over it, super quickly? I dunno, just not feeling this one.

* "All those years wasted, when I could have been loving you." The answer was easy, obvious. "You were." Well, glad we got that sorted and are completely over the thing that devastated you and broke your heart. Now it’s a sign that he loved you? I mean, yes, but, jeez. Enough with the drama.

Bottom line: the story has potential, but Emma just doesn’t have enough interesting about her to hold my attention. Their breaking point is over dramatized, and the sex is just meh.