May 22
Mal: would you kiss my best friend to save my life?
Ben: I would stick my tongue down Jay’s throat for free.
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Mal: would you kiss my best friend to save my life?
Ben: I would stick my tongue down Jay’s throat for free.
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Lonnie: would you rather have a threesome with Ben and Jay or Ben and Gil?
Mal: Ben, Jay and Gil.
Ben, Jay and Gil: agreed.
Jay: watching them from the armchair isn’t enough anymore. I need to be on my knees in front of them when they do it so they can pat me on the head and call me a good boy.
Jay: whenever I’m around Ben and Mal I’m like Tom Hardy talking about Venom.
Lonnie: I hate that I understood that reference.
Jay: can you really call yourself her best friend if she doesn’t regularly invite you to threesomes with her and her husband?
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Jay: I just had a threesome with my best friend and her husband. Best thanksgiving ever.
Lonnie: why are you always constantly third wheeling a married couple?
Jay: they’re hot, I’m whipped and they let me join in. What more could you possibly want me to say?
Ben: Mal and I aren’t technically dating Jay. But we’re not going to refuse him if he wants to join us either.